(Disclaimer: Don't own 'em. Simple as that. I'm sure if I did they wouldn't even exist to the public. :D –sneaksawayandstealsKyoanyhow- I don't own the song that inspired this either. Warnings: CRACK. Yes, I will say it now. Pure crack. Why am I purposely writing crack? I dunno. But I'm watching House right now (which I don't own either). So besides being completely ridiculous, this will contain shonen-ai (boyxboy) and obviously OOCness. :3 But thanks for reading it anyhow!)
Heard this song in the car, was thinking of KyoYuki, and voilà. Enjoy. 'Cause I know I'll enjoy torturing these poor suckers.
Yuki cautiously opened his eyes as he reluctantly pulled away from sleep. He groaned and nestled more into the warmth of the bed, hugging the pillow to his head and curling up into a ball. He drowsily noted the pulsing headache he currently had. He also noted that the room was curiously dark. He always left his blinds up at night. Were for it not the sun he'd never get up in time.
"You finally awake, or, well, semi-awake?"
Kyo? "More or less," he grumbled out. Slowly he concluded that they, in fact, were not at home, and therefore somewhere else as Kyo sat on the bed. "Where are we?"
Kyo shrugged. "I think Shigure and Ayame dragged us over the ocean and into America."
Yuki cautiously sat up. "…Where?"
Kyo shrugged again. "Ask them. They're in the room over."
"You know. Just tell me."
After a moment of hesitation Kyo answered. "Vegas."
Yuki processed this and came to a realization. He, for some reason, had a hangover. He was shocked, but that wasn't half of it.
Kyo placed a bottle in his hands. "Aspirin. Take some. It'll help."
"Do you…remember what happened last night?" he asked while dumping out a couple of aspirin.
He could feel Kyo stiffen as he quickly said, "No."
Yuki rolled his eyes as he swallowed the pills and set the bottle aside. "You're lying."
Kyo sighed. "You can't figure it out yourself?"
Yuki looked over at Kyo, who was dressed in only a pair of cargo pants, with his back facing him. Then he took note of himself. He nearly startled back in shock when he noticed his lack of clothes. He furiously blushed as his mind connected two and two together. He hid his face in his arms and rested them on his knees that he had pulled up. He didn't miss the slight pain that was in his legs. Joy.
"What?" He mumbled.
"Look at your hand. Your left hand."
Curious, he did. He did not like what he saw.
"Yeah." Kyo agreed to the stunned silence.
"We did not."
"It's not even legal…Is it?"
Kyo shrugged for a third time. "Whatever we did it sure as hell worked."
"How long has it been since you woke up?"
He knew for a fact that Kyo routinely woke up at six, no matter what. He was surprised he himself had naturally woken so early. But it also explained why Kyo could act so calmly right now.
"Who did you bother?" Yuki asked.
Kyo nodded. "I dragged him out of the room, went to the lobby and freaked."
Yuki grimaced. "I'm taking a shower." Maybe freak out a little myself when I get in there, he thought. He carefully slid out of the bed grabbed some random clothing to cover his body and hid in the bathroom. He hid his face in his clothes and screamed for a brief few seconds. Then he banged his head once on the door.
He sighed. He was gonna kill both the dog and the snake the next time he saw them. For now he took a shower, dressed and came out looking remarkably better than he had going in. He quickly surveyed the room, and glowered at the two new occupants of the room.
Kyo was currently glowering at Shigure, who, along with Ayame, was being a complete nuisance of himself.
"Long night, eh, Yuki?" Shigure said, winking.
"Shut up, Dog." Kyo growled.
Yuki gave both Shigure and Ayame an accusing look. "I know I didn't get drunk on my own."
Ayame smiled and danced over to Yuki, wrapping his arm around his shoulders. "Dear brother, all that matters is that all that tension is finally gone!"
Yuki slowly blinked and the paused in his rage to look over at Kyo, who was looking back. They both flushed and Kyo muttered, "What tension?"
"Oh, the tension that was so thick that you could cut it with a knife," Ayame answered airily. "Shigure, would you be a dear and let Haru and Momiji in?"
"Of course, Aya," Shigure replied and all but danced to the door.
Yuki and Kyo both stared blankly at the door as it opened to reveal the ever bouncy rabbit and the cow.
"Good late-morning, everyone!" Momiji greeted as he happily bounced into the room.
Haru immediately stalked over to Kyo and smacked him across the face. Momiji frowned and tugged on Haru's other arm. "Haru that's rude. You have to say hi first!"
They all stared disbelievingly at Momiji as Haru just smirked. "Hello, Kyo."
"What the hell did I do?" Kyo asked angrily as he prepared to hit him back.
Yuki frowned and quickly held Kyo back.
"You stole away Yuki," Haru answered.
Said rat paled. "What?"
"You weren't exactly being quiet, dear brother."
Haru's eyes lit up and he swiftly pulled Yuki away from Kyo and grasped his chin. He leered at him, smirk firmly in place. "Hello, Yuki. I was going to make you mine."
Kyo shoved Haru out of the way and hugged Yuki possessively. "Hands off, Cow."
Yuki flushed. "I can take care of myself, stupid cat."
"Ooooh, a bit possessive, aren't we?" Haru taunted.
Momiji tugged on Haru's arm again. "Haru, stop being so mean." He pouted and turned to Kyo. "You too, Kyo."
"Thank you, Momiji." Yuki calmly said.
The sound of a camera quickly resounded through the room. Yuki and Kyo's eyes widened and they both launched themselves at Shigure, desperately trying to get the camera.
Momiji happily chatted with a now white Haru, when Yuki finally realized something.
As Kyo finally grabbed the camera away, Yuki quietly asked, "What about Akito?"
Kyo stopped inspecting the camera and wrapped his arms comfortingly around Yuki. "We'll worry about him if he ever finds out. For now, don't worry about it. We can worry about him when we get back home."
Yuki just leaned back and nodded.
Shigure grinned. "Great! We still have a few more days here! "
"Oh yes, Shigure, we simply must…" And there they went. Planning things, along with Momiji, that no one else had a say in.
"Here we go again," Kyo muttered, rolling his eyes.
Yuki turned around and gently kissed him. "Here we go again."
NK's Giant Paragraph of Utter and Complete Nonsense: …my dividers are getting less and less creative. ): Oh well. XD Uhm. Not much to say about this one. It's as close to crack as I'm gonna get, I suppose. Man. I need to make up for this somehow. Dx I hope it made SOME sense at least. Man. It's so poorly written it burns. XD
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