A/N: I'm trying something new. This is my final chapter for this story. Are you ready? Cause I am.
I clung to my legs, grasping at the fabric of my jeans as I pulled my legs further to my chest. Sweat poured from my forehead and I could tell that I wasn't going to make it. I needed help, and there wasn't one person on the entire east coast that could save me. Small whimpers emitted from the back of my throat as I tried desperately to pull myself together. It honestly wasn't working. My veins were pounding with pent up rage and I wanted nothing more then to just fling myself over the edge of this building and be done with it. I hated this and I hated the fact that I have to fight this alone.
"O-Oh God!" I scream out, finding myself unable to keep my mouth shut anymore. I tried to breath, but I found that my lungs decided to stop working. I felt I could taste them in the back of my throat, all spongy and whatnot. It was weird when I felt my cheeks wet with warm tears that were rapidly cooling. I thought I cried myself out two weeks ago. My heart beats felt irregular and pounded furiously at my chest. It hurt.
"I can't believe I was so stupid to actually leave Forks and think it will all work out." I yelled into the night sky loudly. Thank God for the noisy city traffic. I let my head fall back against the door to the stairs trying to hold back my…..change. My joints began to pop, that sweet sickening noise that would bring me to my other form. The ligaments in my legs followed suit and no matter what I did I couldn't hold back anything.
"This is it….someone's gonna see me and they are gonna know about—" I couldn't even bring myself to say the last word. "...o-oh god I can't let that happen." I stood up only to feel my joints pop again with the feeling of transformation. I let out a loud groan before moving my body behind a ventilation shaft. The roof was the only safe place within city limits for me at the moment so here I would stay until the beast within me died.
Another pop of my joints sent me into the oblivion of darkness.
My hand wrapped around a fork and I started to dig into the lovely food that Emily prepared. It tasted as good as it smelled and my stomach thanked me by growling in satisfaction. It's been too long since the last time I've been at Sam and Emily's house…let alone eat here.
"Alright we have to discuss a few matters involving territories Jake." Sam said before pausing momentarily to stare at his former pack member. "I'm sorry that our tribes are…well split. I wish we can bring our packs together, but since we're too stubborn this is how it's going to be." Sam said this too authoritivly for my taste which completely irked me. I can't deal with the fact that he still thinks he's my leader. That's it. I'm done letting him talk to me like I'm 5. I'm more of a leader then him anyway. I place my fork down on the table and raise an eyebrow at Sam. He just stared at me, so I cross my arms and leaned back all casual like.
"Look Sam….I really don't appreciate you thinking YOU'RE leading this meeting. We are both pack leaders so I demand the respect my title ensures me. Got that?" Even before this meeting I was in a bad mood so being here doesn't make it any better. And the look Sam is giving me is really bugging me. He stood up from the table and walked over to the window with his arms crossed over his chest. He let out a breath and just gazed out at the land. The land that we are suppose to protect as a team. But he's not a team player, so you know what? Neither am I. Feeling the need to be more dominate I stand up. My mouth opens to speak, but before I could get a single word out, I feel a sudden lurch between my gut.
"Whoa." I manage between short huffs. The pain within me continue to tug at my gut and I know for a fact I'm going to be sick. Taking one more glance at Sam and Emily I bolted out of the door and out of my skin. I Continued to run, the ache in my legs trying to outweigh the ache in my gut. It hurt like a bitch. And then it occurred to me that the only person who could make my body do this to me was Bella. I howled in agony as I began to steer myself into another course. A course that would leave me to my love.
I closed my eyes and concentrated on trying to hear Bella inside my head, but her voice came out like a broken radio wave. Static filled and skipping words.
'Bella? It's Jake. I need you to completely change for me. I will walk you through everything, but you need to be in your wolf form. Okay baby? Please let go….for me?'
I heard short words but nothing that told me she'd do it. Before I knew it though, I reached city limits and was running myself into an open highway. I tried as hard as I could to stay with in the thinning forest but it was no use. Frustrated and angry I pressed my head into the dirt and tried even harder to deliberate my next move.
The calming voice inside my head told me to let go. I wanted to so bad….I really did. I just wanted everything to be normal without this-this monster trying to break out. My legs popped and cracked with the sound of change so I decided to listen to the Jacob voice and just….let go. I ripped my shirt and pants off before my skin started to grow white fur and my spine shifted with an audible crunch.
I held back my growls as best I could and hid my body behind a ventilation shaft that was sticking out from the roof. Feeling the smallest ounce of safety as I laid there, I decided to try to hear my boyfriend.
I instantly felt weak after that and closed my eyes to try to rest. I knew Jacob would be coming. He had to. I needed him more then words can explain….and in some sick way I knew he needed me too. It just worked that way with us.
'Bella? Oh thank god. What happened to you? I was talking to Sam and I felt your need for me. Please tell me what happened Bells.'
I sighed and felt instantly better feeling Jacobs worry for me. It made my anxiety wash away.
'I felt the need to change and I can't do it here you know? Too many people and no forests. It just doesn't work. So lately it's been getting worse and worse. Now I can't control it.'
'Can't control it? Bell's its unhealthy to not change after a certain period of time. When you're young at least…..'
'I want to change back now. I'll call you….'
I pulled myself to my feet and tried to contort my body to my human form. My bones started a dull throbbing which only made me try even harder. I started to grumble without success of change.
'It's not working. Jacob I'm stuck!'
'What do you mean stuck?' He sounded panicky which made me all the more nervous.
'I can't get back.' I tried once more, but my legs wouldn't pop back…nor would my arms. My heart began to panic and pound against my chest like a jackhammer. 'Oh god. I'm STUCK!' I started to whimper and bury my head in my paws. I could hear the confusion in Jakes mind. It radiated like waves.
'Stuck?' Jacob asked.
'Jake! Help!' I continued to struggle and pop my joints but it did not work in the least. Helplessly I lay back down incase anyone spotted me from there apartment views. Damn cities. I could hear Jacob's deep voice in my head whispering words of encouragement as he ran through the dwindling forest. I could see everything in his eyes when I tried hard enough. Though the exhaustion struck me like a train and I could feel myself falling in a pit of dreamless sleep that I knew coming out of wouldn't be easy.
'Bella? Oh please don't pass out on me now….'
I couldn't listen to that smooth rough voice in my head because before I knew it, sleep found me and the last thing I saw were the blinking lights of the city.
I ran. I ran so fucking hard I could feel my lungs about the burst into shreds of cell tissue. But stopping was just not an option. For me it never was. I've been running for a good hour and a half and I knew that it wouldn't take me long to get there. But my only problem was how to get INTO the city fast without being in my wolf form. Thank god the sun was setting to the point where maybe blending into the scenery might be possible. My other dilemma was that if I DID change back into my human form I wouldn't have clothes.
'Fuck' I thought as I felt my paws dig further into dirt as my leap became greater. It wouldn't be long before I got to Bella. I could already smell her sweet citrus scented skin. Apparently thinking about Bella made my legs work harder, so I continued on that train of the thought. Bella's eyes…those deep eyes that made my blood stop. And those perfect lips that invited me. I ached to tear them apart. It's been too long. MY mind also wondered off to searching for Bella inside my mind. I could feel her small pulse, but other then that—nothing.
I probably blanked out for a while because I began to see a highway run beside the trees I was dodging. Maybe if I followed it, it would lead me to where I needed to go. So I did just that. I followed it.
Have you ever been conscious but not completely awake? Like your mind is awake, but you can feel that your body is still resting? That's how I felt at the moment. Exhaustion only for my outer body. My mind felt trapped, and I feel like I've been fighting the monster in me all night.
I heard a voice that was oh so familiar to me, and the best part was I don't think I was dreaming. Rough hands were on me in seconds. Petting my fur and making my muscle unclench. I heard myself start to whimper and the immediate 'shhh' that followed it soothed me. Before I even opened my eyes I knew Jacob was here. This brought a warm flood of happiness through my veins. Jacob sent me a smile and I want to leap into his arms and kiss him to death. But first I needed to become human.
"Bella…." Jacob repeated as he hugged me around my furry neck. I licked the side of his face and rested my muzzle in his bare chest. I noticed Jake's jean shorts were way too tight and I really couldn't wait to be human again to laugh at it. His petting became slower and a saddened expression crossed his face. I was confused.
"I don't know how to say this, but I'll just be blunt with it. I don't know how to change you back."
I pulled myself away from Jacob, but I knew deep down that would be the case. He stepped closer and rested his hands under my muzzle, pulling my face up to meet his. No words needed to be spoken. The two of us sat down and just silently enjoyed being in each others company. It felt right.
Eventually we fell asleep.
Seeing Bella stuck the way she was nearly broke my heart. The love of my very long life felt broken and there was no way I could even fix it. I let her head lay in my lap as I ran my fingers through her furry mane. Even in her wolf form, Bella was beautiful. Bella made it worth wearing these 'too-tight' shorts and pretending someone mugged you to get a free ride into town.
Yep, she was definitely worth it. And with that thought lingering in my mind, we fell asleep.
The morning sunrise was a bitch. It really was. I rolled on my side and brought Bella's body with me, trying to shade her from the heated rays. My fingers rolled over her skin—before I completely stopped. I cracked my eyes open to be greeted with the site of Bella in her human form, naked as can be, just sleeping as peacefully as ever.
"BELLA!" I yelled which apparently startled her because she shot straight up and stared at me.
"What?" She said before staring down at her fingers and then legs, an incredibly smile creeping on her lips. It was beautiful. "I'm not stuck." Bella stated which just made me smile more.
"What the hell happened?" I asked, unable to control my questions. Reaching out I cupped my girl friends cheek and smiled. She returned it along with a shrug.
"I don't know….I dreamed about turning back. I really did. You were in that dream….but anyway, I guess my subconscious broke whatever held me back." She finished speaking and all I could do was stare at her. I didn't even speak before pouncing on her and crushing her into my body. Oh god how I missed her face. And her soft hands running over my skin as we kissed and held each other. Completely magical, that is until we pulled away. I stared at her face and kissed her forehead before letting her snuggle back into my chest.
"I won't last not seeing you for this long Bella…." I started softly as she twined her fingers in my hair.
"I agree. But there's nothing we can do really." Her voiced wavered off in the end and I could tell she wanted to cry.
"What if I come here once a week and stay for a day or two—on the weekends of course. Would that maybe make things better?" Bella pulled back and stared at my face before kissing me soundly on the lips. This felt right and she knew it.'
Her confirmation of these new plans made me probably the most happiest I've been in my life. The hell we went through these past weeks was complete and utter agony. We sat on the roof a while longer, just holding and kissing each other. Completely picture perfect. Then again we are a pretty hot couple. This sounds corny, but our future looks bright and I honestly couldn't wait to start it.
Totally got completely corny in the end. I'm too tired to care though at the moment. I'll look back on this and laugh one day. Ha ha.
Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed this story. Not too terrible right? Especially with my mind always elsewhere…especially with finals and regents' next week. Blah. The inspiration for this last chapter came from the novel 'Blood and Chocolate'. It was pretty good.
So this might be my last Twilight fic for like….ever? Nah maybe just a while. Twilight is pissing me off cause of lame fan girls making everything less awesome. The book isn't even that great. I've read WAY better. Don't get mad though. But if you guys give me phenomenal reviews then I may cook something up….who knows ;)
Alright I'm done boring you guys.
Thanks for reading.