Seven Is My Unlucky Number
Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts, Square Enix and Disney do!
Notes: I am insane. I love torturing people. Saïx is one of my favorite victims for such things.
Another Note: May cause your eyes to bleed. And that's just a happy and nice warning!
I don't exactly know how to explain what happened to my body, let alone my soul. One day I had disappeared from existence. Normal? I don't think so. It happened, though, and I'm not exactly sure how I dealt with that. But then again all I ever did was float around in nothingness and say things like 'What's my name, who am I, and why am I here?' In fact, I think those were the only three things that continued to come to my mind because I had forgotten what I had forgotten and I couldn't remember what it was that was forgotten.
Confused yet? I am. It's something that I learned later on in my after life…if you could call it that…
But first I have to explain how I even became what I am now, if I'm even existing. They say I'm not, but then again…these people have always been ones to lie.
Anyway, back to explaining how I came to exist. First, though, I have to explain a little background about myself. People have always told me that 7 is a lucky number. For me that is a giant lie. On my 7th birthday I had the worst experience in my life that any 7-year-old could experience. I was told to go outside and bring in my favorite dog, Wolf, and to take a light with me. What 7-year-old ever listens to their parents, though? Exactly. So instead I went out without the light to fetch my pooch.
That day will forever be burned in my mind.
It was a full moon out so I decided the light was clearly unnecessary in my situation. Seriously, who needs a light when the place is glowing? Wolf was out on his leash. He was a border collie with fluffy fur and was a great companion. Had him ever since I was born, in fact. Well, I was stupid and forgot to grab onto his collar before unleashing him, so off he went into the forest barking like a beast.
That forest scares the hell out of me.
My dog, though, so I have to get him. Besides, I didn't want mom or dad knowing that I was being stupid and not only forgot to get a light but had also lost my dog. Off I went into that forest and was soon shrouded in darkness. If only I was smart enough to know that trees block off the moon's shine. Whatever, right? Nothing to get scared over.
Or so I thought.
I was calling Wolf's name when I heard the nastiest blood curdling whine from that dog. My skin crawled, my muscles tensed, and I was about to piss myself. The crying and whining continued until I heard a different noise. Howling. I scrambled to find Wolf as I continued to call out his name when I saw the worst thing in my life.
Are you ready for this?
I hope so.
There was my poor dog, body ripped open with blood all over the forest floor. It was really hard to see, but I knew that it wasn't mud that covered Wolf's white fur. And then I saw the gruesome creature that had killed my dog. A beast so beastly that…I'm not even sure how to describe it. Half human, half dog…something like that. In fact, it scared me so much I refuse to this day to watch X-Men because I hear there are creatures a lot like it in the movie.
Aside from that, this beast snarled as soon as it saw me. And being the scared 7-year-old that I was…I screamed for my life and ran for it.
In fact I ran inside the house and jumped in bed and refused to come out until the next day. Oh, but that wasn't all. Dad demanded that I explain where Wolf was at. So how was I supposed to even tell him that a beast devoured him? I couldn't. I just pointed to the forest, blubbered like a baby, and finally headed out with him to find the dog. That corpse will forever stay in my memories. After I had left that beast thing had ripped apart my dog so much it was hardly a dog anymore. Just fur and mashed guts. Wolf's head, though, was completely fine. I remember seeing its blank eyes gleaming at me. Well…it seemed they were doing such, but then again I was scared as hell so my mind was probably playing tricks on me. And I remember the words that my dad said to me when he saw that sight.
"Kid, this is why you can't have nice things."
Yes. That's exactly what he said. He told me to go inside and help my mom fold clothes while he took care of Wolf. And as soon as mom saw me she only had one thing to say to me.
"Why are you crying? Did you break something? If not then wipe those tears and put these towels away."
I cried for 7 days after that incident. In fact, each week that passed I would stare out at that ugly forest and wonder if that creature was still out there waiting for me. Waiting to devour human flesh instead of my poor dog, Wolf.
I know this must sound really idiotic, but there's a lot more to the number 7 than just the fact that it ruined my birthday. In school I was the 7th to last person in the alphabet. Not much of a big deal, right? Wrong. I always got bummed out of a good locker and had to share with some freak that couldn't even count up to ten.
I also hated Valentine's Day. We always had to create paper bags with decorations on them and our name in glitter glue. The teacher would call one person up at a time to drop candy into each bag, but everyone didn't even know how to count, let alone know how to drop one candy in instead of two. So they'd go down the line and drop one in, giggle, go to the next and drop one in…and then they'd find their best friend's bag, so they'd drop in two causing their entire count to get off. As soon as they reached near the end of the line they'd realize their mistake and they'd improvise. The teacher wouldn't notice that they had accidentally missed a bag. Oh, but they had to be strategic about it. Missing the end bag would cause havoc. And so they always picked the 7th to last bag. How would I know this? Because I never got any Valentine's. Ever. Okay, once I got a sticker, but that was it.
There's even more to it than that.
The 7th table was where I sat at. I had the broken desk where leaning on it ever so slightly would cause it to combust in on itself. My chair was just as cheap because one leg was shorter than the others so I sat lop-sided the whole time. And then I'd get yelled at 7 times a day to sit straight.
Oh, I'm not even finished.
Every test we're given I always miss the 7th question. No matter how easy or hard it was. In fact, it could have said 'what's your favorite color?' and I would have gotten it wrong.
I always got 7 out of 10 on every spelling test I ever took. And once I had actually gotten 8 out of 10, but I had accidentally spelt my own name wrong, so I was docked a point.
I also remember when I got braces. It was the 7th of February. There was a giant blizzard out and I had hoped we wouldn't be able to make it, but somehow my dad managed to pull through and get me there. And then what do they do? They want to screw with my teeth. The nurse lady I had was a complete moron and didn't even know what she was doing, so instead of giving me enough shots to numb my mouth she gave me too little. All I can say is that I cried for 7 days after that.
And I'd also like to say that I didn't have any friends…because I was the 7th person…and it made things terribly uneven. So I always sat out.
Things got a bit better after I was 7…but then I turned 17.
You're starting to get the picture, I can tell.
I went to my very first theme park ever. Ever. And I will never ever again experience such a thing. Ever.
I had gained friends, I know…pretty special, and they wanted to go on some deadly looking roller coaster that screamed terror and adventure. I couldn't really refuse, I had to suck it up and be a man. So I got in line and waited with them. And what happens? The 7th cart is the last one open…and it has my name all over it. I suck it up and get in with one of my friends thinking that my curse is just my mind playing tricks on me. I'm buckled up, harnessed in, ready for the adventure of my life. We shoot off at a rather high speed and all I could think of was 'hey, I think something's wrong'. Oh, but I don't bother to say anything at all because I'm a moron. As soon as we got to the loops, though, I finally figured out what it was. My harness was broken. I started to scream because…hey, you'd be freaked out, too. And then we went through the loops. Through? No. It got about so far before the ride started to break down. I remember hearing the ride lose its 'WHOOSH' noise as soon as we got to the top. The harness that was holding me creaked and a bolt flung to its deadly doom. We went through and I saw we had another loop to go through. And that was when I knew we weren't going to make it.
"Oh shit." Those were my last words for that day. I distinctively remember getting so far up when the harness flung itself to the sea below. Thankfully I was wearing a seatbelt, but that didn't stop me from much. The ride went through the loop somehow and went for its next deadly location. Which was a quick snap to the right.
I bashed my face right into the seat in front of me from the sudden force. And I didn't wake up.
When I did wake up I was in the hospital all by myself with some ugly old nurse glaring down at me. She snarled at me about 'kids these days' and that was that. I was in the hospital for 7 days.
One last story before I give up on the pattern here. It was senior year for me, a few days before prom. In fact, it was the 7th. My friends had called up and asked if I wanted to hang out. No. Of course not. Fuck. No.
They convinced me otherwise.
"We're just going to stay at one house, that's it. Nothing can go wrong." Yeah. Of course. So I went. I was sitting in the back in the spot that didn't have a seatbelt. Should have known this would only be trouble, but it wasn't like we were going far. But we passed our destination because they wanted to pick up some food before we stopped. Whatever, right? We'll be fine.
And then we got into the car accident of my life. I remember screaming "Watch out!" But you know…that never works. Well, it did in a way. The car that was heading right at us we swerved and missed, but that didn't stop us from hitting the tree that was in the way. And of course me, being in the seat with no seatbelt, flung forward into the window and smacked right into the tree. The rest of that week I can't recollect because I was out.
I still have the 'X' shaped scar on my face from that day.
So the main question asked is…why do I bring this up?
Well…I died one day…but I don't exactly remember how it happened. I'm assuming it involved the number 7 somehow. I just remember being nothing in a place that was nothing surrounded by other nothings.
And then one day I became something.
'Who am I? What am I? Where am I?'
I want to move but I can't. I want to look but I have no eyes. I wish to feel, but I can't remember how to feel or how to wish.
'What have I become? What's left of me? What's wrong with me?'
I want to remember who I am but I don't think I can. I want to remember other people, but my memory escapes me. I want to want in general, but it's impossible to do when I've forgotten how to do just that.
'Am I dead?'
Good question, now if only someone could answer it.
"I think I'll call you Saïx."
Who was that? Where was that voice coming from?
"You can open your eyes now."
I have eyes? Oddly enough I could open them. But…I could have sworn a few minutes ago they were gone—
"Yes, that's it. Can you feel yourself returning now? The darkness no longer holds you, nor does the light."
Who the hell was this guy and why was he talking like that? Pretty tan skin…bright orange eyes. Hmm…but I've never met him in my life. Or have I? I'm pretty sure I haven't. Right?
"Come this way, Saïx, you belong with the Organization."
All right…whatever you say. Jeez, this castle is so huge…who could afford such a nice looking place like this? Then again…where was this place anyway?
"Don't be shy, this way." Yeah, I'm coming as fast as I can, all right? Not like I can walk any faster. Hell, I think I've forgotten how to walk correctly, is that pathetic? Probably.
"Here's your room. We'll talk more in the morning, I'm sure you'll be very curious when you awaken."
Oh baby, look at this bed. Heck, I'll sleep for a week in this thing.
I had a dream, not that it's important or anything, but it's the first dream I've had for a very long time. It's where this guy finds me half naked outside some weird place and takes me into a giant castle and gives me a nice, comfy room to sleep in. Of course, when I woke up that morning I found out it wasn't actually a dream but a reality. Now I'm not quite sure on whether I should be freaked out by the fact that some unknown man has just taken me in or the fact that I'm wearing clothes that I would never wear in my life.
Black. Leather. Everywhere.
Oh freaking God headache from hell. Ahem. All right, now I feel better.
"About time you woke up, man. Come on, we don't have all day." And who was this angry looking brick of a moron? Brick…of a moron? Great, even my insults are as stupid as my lost memory. I didn't say anything, though, just followed him to a new meeting area. There were lots of them. Okay, not lots…but six others besides myself—wait a minute. Oh no.
"Good evening, Saïx, and welcome to the Organization. I am Xemnas, your Superior."
Xemnas smiled and nodded, "You're the first person to arrive that wasn't of our original six members. Congratulations. You might feel odd…well, if you could feel that is. We are all Nobodies. A type of Heartless that went much farther…we use our previous bodies from an existence that is no longer, and now we exist as things that don't actually exist. It might not make much sense right now, but—"
"I don't exist?"
They all fell silent as he spoke. Xemnas nodded a few times, "That's right."
"It's nothing to get worked up over, we're working to exist again through gaining our hearts back. We need more members though. At first we believed it was impossible to gain more people, but you've proved us wrong."
"How did I do that?"
"You started to remember," Xigbar replied.
"But…I don't…remember anything."
Zexion nodded, "Of course. You started to remember, but once that happened you forgot. Xemnas found you because you were remembering. Since you've been saved from nothingness, though, your memory went away again."
"So…if you hadn't saved me I would have remembered more?"
They fell silent again and Xemnas shook his head, "It's impossible. Your mind doesn't know what a memory is and what isn't. It probably would have weaved you lies."
"I see…" No I don't.
"It'll make more sense later on. Right now your head is fuzzy because you've been under the darkness for so long. I can help you regain balance, though! I'm good at those things," Vexen hissed and licked his lips.
"Is there something else I should know right now?"
"Yes, we go by a numbered system of roman numerals."
"Yes. You're sitting in the 7th chair, therefore you're member number 7."
Saïx got up quickly and moved away from the chair. Fuck no I'm not sitting in that chair. It's probably cursed! Just like everything else that's been marked 7!
Everyone watched him jump up. Xigbar raised an eyebrow, "What's the matter?"
"This is some kind of a…trick."
Xaldin shook his head, "No. It's not."
"I don't want to be 7."
Lexaeus grunted, "Why?"
"Because the number 7 and I have had a terrible history together…"
Vexen, who was playing with his hair, dropped the ends and glanced over at him. "You've had a history with a number?"
"Yeah. One that I feel like I don't need to explain."
Xemnas smiled, "Oh, so you do remember something! That's splendid!"
Saïx frowned. Eh, what? "What do you mean…?"
"The number 7 made you remember your past, or at least some part of it. How much do you remember?"
Saïx shrugged. Like how the hell am I supposed to know? "A few things….um. Can I just…go back home? I'll just end up dying or something if I stay as VII."
Zexion scoffed, "That's impossible, it's just a number."
"If you were me you wouldn't say that."
"What is so scary about the number 7?"
Saïx sniffed. Think, boy, what was so scary about it? Tell a personal story, but put it in different terms! "It killed my dog." Idiot, that's still in personal terms. Saïx nodded before anyone could ask, "And almost killed me numerous times."
Vexen stood up, "It's a NUMBER. It can't kill anything! It can calculate and make other numbers, but it can't physically doom people!" His hair began to frizz as he spazzed at Saïx.
"Sit down, Vexen, you'll scare him," Xemnas ordered. He smiled at Saïx and waved his hand, "You can sit anywhere you like, then, how's about that?"
Saïx hesitated. Anywhere I like? "Anywhere?"
Xemnas nodded his head slightly and his smirk grew, "Do you want to sit in my spot? It isn't marked with a VII."
"Are you…making fun of me? I don't appreciate that."
The Superior shook his head, "I'm only reassuring you that my chair isn't an unlucky number."
Xigbar sighed, "Dude, if it bothers you that much you can have my chair, I'm not afraid of numbers."
Saïx glared at them all. Eat dirt. Yes, dirt. "I just want to go home…"
"You don't have a home," Xaldin said.
"What do you mean? I know I live somewhere—"
"That place is no longer your home. This is your home."
Saïx let his eyes loom on Xaldin before glancing at Xemnas, "Is that true?"
Xemnas nodded, "Unfortunately, yes. You're dead to everyone, so returning would only cause havoc…well…if they can even see you. Sometimes we're like ghosts…completely unseen to the human eye."
Saïx was speechless. How was he supposed to even respond to that?
"We should discuss other things, though. As part of the Organization you have an element and a weapon. These things are predetermined based on your previous life. We, of course, do not know what they are, so we'll have to wait and see what you can do."
Xemnas nodded for the group to brandish their weapons. They did and Saïx stared at all of their interesting items. Sweet, deadly weapons! Wait, what if mine sucks? Shit! It'd be a giant number 7! "And…these elements are like…wind and earth and crap?"
Xemnas nodded, "Precisely."
Vexen snorted, "Minus the crap."
"How do I found out what I have?"
Xaldin laughed, "You fight until it shows up, that's how."
"Not to doubt what you're saying…but what if it never shows?"
The group exchanged looks again. This boy must really not have any confidence whatsoever. Xemnas nodded, "You'll get it sooner or later, don't worry. Some just take longer than others."
Saïx crossed his arms over his chest, "When do you expect me to…find out?"
"Not right now, you still have many things to learn. Such as a tour around this place. This meeting is finished for now, I'll show you about."
Zexion frowned, "Xemnas? Shouldn't one of us do it?"
"Nonsense. Considering he's the first of his kind I'd like to find out more about him. This way, Saïx, let's start over here. Ask me anything you want!" Xemnas and Saïx both went off together with that. The others continued to sit there and brood.
"I have a feeling Xemnas is going to start picking favorites," Xigbar retorted.
"I believe you're right," Xaldin agreed.
Zexion sighed. Here they go again. "Guys, let's not make bets on this type of thing. Just because Saïx is the first Nobody to show up that isn't of our original six members doesn't mean he'd like him more than us."
"Is that what you think? I have to agree with Xaldin and Xigbar. We're doomed," Vexen simpered and got up, leaving the group.
Their eyes landed on Lexaeus. He only shrugged and got up, leaving.
"Oy…I hope you guys aren't right," Zexion mumbled.
This is just a short beginning to a new fic I'm thinking about writing. It's written in 3rd person, but the entire beginning was Saix's thoughts, so that's why it's in italics. It's mostly based around Saix's beginning into the Organization and bits about his past. If you guys like it please review! There will most likely be some XemSai later on, too.