"You're kidding, right?" Kyoraku Shunsui asked in disbelieve. Ukitake Jyuushirou's mouth was wide open and so were his eyes.

"No, I'm not." Head Captain Yamamoto said.

Ukitake stepped forward and clenched his fists together "Yamamoto-sensei, please excuse my rudeness, but this is out radius!! Why do we have to do this?!?! THIS IS MADNESS!!" he shouted.

"No, this is the SOUL SOCIETY!" the older one shouted back. "And you two have done a very terrible crime that must be paid for!!"

Ukitake stepped back and stood up straight again. He was quiet.

Kyoraku chuckled "Come on Old Man Yama~! So we broke the seal on the most dangerous weapon in the Soul Society AND we blow up half of Canada!! Psh~!! How bad could that have been?!"

Yamamoto pointed to a screen and it showed thousands of people dead and other people looking for their loved ones. "Does THAT answer your question?!?!"

Kyoraku put his hat down a bit and his head "Oh… uh yeah… it does…"

"But do we really have to do this in front of the whole Soul Society?!" Ukitake asked.

"Yes, the WHOLE Soul Society has to see this."


"Because I thought it suited you two."

Kyoraku and Ukitake both blushed and looked the other way.

"You have 4 hours to get ready then you have to be at the court yard. Understood?"

"Yes sir…" they both said has their heads fell.

Kyoraku looked down at his colors "Well at least I get to wear SOMETHING that a bit like my old clothes…" he wore a white tank under a pink and reddish thin short sleeved jacket that had red, green, and white flowers on it his had jeans and sneakers on. He didn't have his head but his hair was still up in its normal loss style.

He looked at the door of the room that Ukitake was changing in "Jyuu, you done in there?"

"Yeah…" Ukitake answered sadly.

Kyoraku tilled his head "You ok?"


"What's wrong?"


Kyoraku chuckled and walked over to the door. He crossed his arms "Well come on out so I can see what you look like."

"No!" Ukitake shouted stubbornly.

"And why not?"

"Because I look ridiculous!!" he shouted.

"Come on it can't be that bad!"


Kyoraku sighed "Do you want me to drag you out of there?"

There was a pause. Ukitake knew that Kyoraku would do it, no doubt in his mind but I was just too embarrassing. He sighed and blushed more "Fine…"

Kyoraku heard Ukitake stand up and walk to the door. There was hesitation but then Ukitake slid the door open.

He wore a big long pink and red dress that what seemed like he stood in a hill or something. It was lacy and it had no sleeves or straps. The dress touched the floor just barely to where you couldn't see his feet. He was taller so he had to be wearing some kind of heels under the mountain of a dress. He had white long gloves on that stopped in the middle of his bicep and his hair was put up into a high, high pony tail which was tied with a red ribbon.

Kyoraku blinked then laughed hard.

Ukitake glared at him and clenched his hands into fists "SHUT UP!! I TOLD YOU IT WAS THAT BAD!!"

Kyoraku fell on the ground and beat the ground with his fist. His eyes started to water from laughing to hard.

"I SAID STOP LAUGHING YOU STUPID MORON!!" Ukitake shouted as he kicked the other.

Kyoraku rolled over onto his back and propped his elbows up behind him. He whipped away the tears from his eyes and smiled up at the other "You don't look stupid Jyuu."

Ukitake crossed his arms and looked away "Yes I do… and you know it!!"

Kyoraku stood up and brushed himself off. He then quickly swept Ukitake into his arms and dipped him. Ukitake yelped and his eyes widened. "I told you, you don't look stupid. You look sexy." Kyoraku purred with a smirk then nuzzled the other's neck "Easy accuses…"

Ukitake blushed "Sh-Shun!" he quickly wrapped his arms around the other's neck and looked at the ground "I swear to the lord, if you drop me-!!"

Kyoraku turned Ukitake's face back so he could see this eyes "I would never think of such a thing." Then he leaned down and kissed him. Ukitake kissed him back.

"Well I guess I could trust, just a bit." Ukitake said as he smiled up at the other. Kyoraku smiled back.

Then there was a knock at the door and Ukitake leaned his head back to look at it upside down. Kyoraku looked up. "Who is it?" Kyoraku called.

"It's Nanao, taichou."

"Oh, come in Nanao-chan~!" Kyoraku said happily.

Nanao opened the door then closed it and leaned on it with her arms crossed "Having fun over there taichou?"

Kyoraku grinned "Lots!"

Ukitake blushed.

Nanao put the back of her hand up to her mouth and she smiled "Nice dress Ukitake-Taichou."

He glared at Shunsui "I blame this on you."

Kyoraku looked at him "What?! What did I do now!?" he asked in a whiney type of voice.

"I think she's starting to get your bad habits." Ukitake told him as the other lifted him back to his feet.

Kyoraku still held him "My bad habits? Like you don't have any of those!"

Ukitake chuckled then turned his head and looked at Nanao "How much more time do we have?"

She thought for a moment "Maybe… 2 hours."

Ukitake sighed "2 hours until my life is over…"

Kyoraku laughed.

"Come on. I came to escort you to the stage so you can practice. You'll go thru it maybe… 4 or 5 times then the real thing will happen." Nanao explained.

Ukitake and Kyoraku nodded "Let's go Jyuu~!" Kyoraku grabbed Ukitake hand and pulled him behind him. "Whoa!" Ukitake shouted then he fell. Kyoraku looked at him in question. Ukitake glared up at him and took off one of the shoes he was wearing then showed it to him. The heel had to be at least 4 or 5 inches high.

"Ouch…" Kyoraku said as he helped his lover up.

"You know what? Screw this." Ukitake kicked off the shoes then stomped out of the room. Kyoraku laughed "That's my Jyuu." Then he followed and so did Nanao.

When they got to the stage, lucky no one was in 8 square miles of the place. It was a big stage with blue keratins hanging in the front then on the sides so the people working back stage wouldn't be seen. It was made of wood and the rows of seats in front of the stage seemed endless.

Ukitake stood there then crossed his arms. He nodded "Yep, this is I'm going to die. Mhmm! Yep, I'm sure of it."

Kyoraku was over with Nanao, looking over her shoulder at what she was doing. He looked up with wide eyes at his lover. Then he chuckled and walked over to him. He wrapped his arms around his waist and put his chin on his shoulder. "You're not going to die Jyuu. I wouldn't let you. Not until I died first."

Ukitake put his hands on the other's lovers and leaned his head back. He smiled at Kyoraku "That's so sweet Shun."

"Hey, I'm a sweet loving guy!"

Ukitake laughed.

Then Nanao coughed "If you two are done over there; can we start the practice?" she called.

They both looked at her and Kyoraku made a puppy face "But I love my toy. I don't want to give him up! I want to play with him forever…" he whined.

Ukitake blushed "Shun!!"

Nanao shook her head and went back to playing with buttons on the machine just inside of the keratin. Then she pushed the music button and the song from Hell started to play.

"I'm a Barbie Girl, in a Barbie world~!"

The two captains' eyes twitched. "Jyuu, it's the song from Hell that we have to dance to…"

Ukitake's face turned whiter than it already was "I know…"

Nanao looked up "Are you ready? You have an hour and a half left."

Kyoraku looked at Ukitake "You ready?"

Ukitake looked at him sadly "No…"

Kyoraku chuckled and let go of him then walked to the other side of the stage.

Ukitake groaned and stomped over to the side that we closest to him. He sat down cross legged then crossed his arms and pouted.

Nanao played the music over Kyoraku walked out but Jyuushirou didn't. Kyoraku looked around then smiled a bit. He walked over to the other and knelt down in front of him "What's wrong?"


Kyoraku chuckled "Yes I know that, but why don't you want to dance with me? Jyuu, Jyuu doesn't want to play with me?"

"No, it's not that, it just that we have to do it front of the whole Soul Society!" the younger one shouted. "I'm not doing this Shun!"

"Are you going angst my orders?"

The other two captain's eyes widened and Nanao saluted. "Hello Head Captain Yamamoto." She said. The other two were frozen.

"Hello Vice-Captain Nanao, at ez." Yamamoto told her and she nodded then went back to what she was doing.

The old man slowly walked up the stairs and over to the other captains. Ukitake and Kyoraku's eyes were locked with each other's and were stuck wide. He cleared his throat "8th Captain Kyoraku Shunsui, 13th Captain Ukitake Jyuushirou, is there a problem?"

Nanao glanced up to watch what was going on.

"N-no sir…" the two lovers said at the same time.

"Then why are you not practicing? I'd like to see."

"Uh, because we were just discussing what we should do! Right Jyuu?" Kyoraku told the older one without taking his eyes away him Jyuushirou's.

Ukitake nodded "Yeah!"

Yamamoto nodded "Very well." The old man turned around and walked back down the stairs. He sat down on one of the benches in right in front of the stage.

"What are we going to do?!" Ukitake asked in a harsh whisper.

Kyoraku smiled "Just go with your gut. That's what I do every day! But when it comes to you, I just use my head."

Ukitake's eyes lowered "Thanks… that makes me feel so happy inside…"

"You're welcome~!" Kyoraku stood up and pulled the other to his feet then walked back across the stage. Ukitake blushed at what his gut what telling him to do. "Oh God… this is going to be bad…" he mumbled.

An hour and a half passed and the area outside of the stage was filling quickly. All the captains sat in the first row, the vice-captains were behind them and all in number order.

Ukitake peeked out then quickly hide back in and put his back straight angst the wall. His face was white and his eyes were wide. His heart started bumping faster and faster. "Oh my God…"

Kyoraku glanced over at him and his eyes widened. He picked up a peanut butter cookie and walked over to him. "What's wrong?" he asked taking a bite of the cookie.

"So… many… people…" Ukitake said without looking at him. Kyoraku glanced out the keratin with half open eyes then looked back at his lover. He swallowed what he was eating "Uh… would it help if I told you were sexy in that dress of yours?"

Ukitake glared at him "No."

Kyoraku thought "Hmm…" he looked at his cookie then back at the other "You want some?"

Ukitake glared at him harder but sighed. At least he was trying. Jyuu smiled "No thank you." He stood up and kissed his cheek "You're so sweet."

Kyoraku put his hand on his cheek then smirked "So if I said something really sweet then what do I get?" Ukitake smirked then turned around and started to walk to other direction. He turned his head, still smirking and said, "Why don't you find out?" he winked at him.

Kyoraku's eyes widened as he watched the other walked away. The he grinned "Fucken' sweet!!" he shouted with the face of a child's at Christmas time. Ukitake laughed.

"Taichou, are you two ready?" Nanao asked as she walked over to her captain. He turned around and stared at her "Ready for what?"

She stared at him like he was an idiot "The show, taichou…"

It took Kyoraku a second but he got it "Oh, Oh! The show! I forgot." He turned his head and gazed at Jyuushirou who was talking to another Soul Reaper. "I kinda got distracted…"

Nanao rolled her eyes "Wow…" then she grabbed his arm and dragged him behind her to the side of the stage.

Yamamoto walked up the stairs with the help of Unohana then stood in front of everyone. "Thank you all for coming to this performance. I'm sure you're all wondering why you had to come here today. Well, as you know, the seal on the most powerful weapon in the Soul Society was broken and half of Canada was blown up."

There were gasps from the people who didn't know.

"Yes, Yes I know it's terrible. And the two who did such a crime were two of our very own captains."

More gasps and even some of the vice-captains gasped.

"So to make up for this terrible crime, they will be doing a little, dance, so to say for us today. I saw them when they were practicing and my personal thought is that they're pretty good."

Kyoraku quietly shouted 'yes' from down stage, which some of the Soul Reapers thought was funny.

"BUT, I thought that one of them, THE OLDEST ONE could have done a better job."

"Damn it!!" Kyoraku shouted "Ow, what was that for?!?"

More people laughed.

"So please enjoy the show." Yamamoto finished and Unohana helped his back off the stage.

Everything went dark and Ukitake's heart started to beat fast again "Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God, oh my God!!" he said in his head a couple times.

Kyoraku peeked out and looked around then at Ukitake. He looked around again then blew him a kiss. He mouthed the words 'I love you' to him and Ukitake relaxed a bit. He mouthed 'I love you too' back to him.

Then one Soul Reaper, each on either side, started to count down on his fingers and mouthed the numbers to the captains. "5, 4, 3, 2, 1" he pointed to the captains. Ukitake took a deep breath and walked out on to the pitch black darkness.

Nobody in the audience could see them, but they knew someone had walked out.

Ukitake put his hand on his hip and the other on the back of his head. He shifted his weight a bit then smirked devilishly out at the other Soul Reapers.

Where Kyoraku stood, 10 Soul Reapers had to keep him back and keep him quiet.

The Soul Reaper on Ukitake said nodded at Nanao who nodded back then pushed the music button. The music started to play and the spot lights shined on Ukitake and people started to laugh. Ukitake blushed and quickly glared at Yamamoto before starting to dance. "Oh, I am SO getting the old man back for this…" he growled in his mind.

He spun around, making that really big dress of his spin and twist. He mouthed the words to the song.

"I'm a Barbie Girl, in a Barbie world~!

Life in plastic, it's fantastic!"

Ukitake twisted his hair around his finger:

"You can brush my hair,"

He picked up some of his dress and spun again:

"Undress me everywhere,

Imagination, life is your creation~!"

As Ukitake sang that last part, Kyoraku started to walk out (surprisingly calm) then as so as Ukitake sang, he quickly spun Jyuu around and in twined his finger with the other's. He put his other arm around his waist and dipped his slightly. His eyes were closed slightly and he had a sly smiled. Ukitake put his hand on Kyoraku's shoulder and smiled at him.

"Come on Barbie, let's go party."

A couple of the girls in the back squealed and other people laughed. Kenpachi fell on the ground laughing and Hitsugaya's open was wide open. Rangiku had to push it back up.

Then Kyoraku lifted Ukitake back to his feet and let him go. They stood next to each other and danced the same movement as Ukitake sang:

"I'm a Barbie Girl, in a Barbie world~!

Life in plastic, it's fantastic!"

They both twisted they're hair around their finger,

"You can brush my hair,"

Then Ukitake picked up his dress again and spun. Kyoraku just spun:

"Undress me everywhere~!

"Imagination, life is your creation!"

Ukitake started to slowly walk around Kyoraku with one hand on his hip his gently ran his finger along Kyoraku's shoulders and smirked at him devilishly.

Kyoraku watched in pain. Oh how he wanted to just tackle that beautiful man he loved so much!

"I'm a blonde single girl in the fantasy world,

Dress me up, take your time, I'm your dolly."

Kyoraku then quickly spun around and grabbed Ukitake before he walked away. He wrapped his arm around his waist:

"You're my doll, rock and roll, feel the glamour and pain."

He smirked and touched his lips

"Kiss me here,"

He then motioned downward

"Touch me there, hanky-panky."

Renji and Ikkaku both fell over laughing and Rukia blushed at what her captain was going thru.

A couple minutes later, the two captains finished and stood close to each other. They were both panting and blushing a bit.

Everyone in the audience started to clap and cheer.

"Oh my God… I'm so glad it's over…" Ukitake said has he put his head down.

Kyoraku chuckled.

Then another song started to play and the two captains' eyes widened. It was the "Lollipop (Candyman)" song!

"What are we suppose to do?!" Ukitake whispered.

Kyoraku thought then started to dance around the stage with the other. "Ok, I have no idea what we're supposed to do but just go with your gut!" Kyoraku whispered back.

Ukitake bit his lip


He sang.

"I am the candy man."

Kyoraku sang.


"Coming from Bountyland"


"I am the candy man."


"Coming from Bountyland!"

Once they finished that song, they both fell to the ground, panting and sweating a bit.

Everyone clapped and cheered again.

"Ok," Ukitake said, "You think it's over NOW?"

Kyoraku looked at him and opened his mouth to say something but the song "Roses are red"

Ukitake glared "Ah hell no! I am NOT doing that again!!" he shouted. He stood up and walked off stage. Kyoraku watched with wide eyes.

Then Ukitake shouted, "Move Nanao!!" then there was a loud crash and the song stopped. "Piece of crap!!" Ukitake shouted. Kyoraku laughed "He's so cute when he's mad." The older one thought.

"Captain Ukitake," Yamamoto called.

Ukitake stomped back out on stage with his Zonpacto unsheathed and tight in his hand "WHAT?!?!" he shouted.

"What are you doing?"


"Stop this instant."

Ukitake put his sword up to his face then cut thru the air "No you stop!! You try dancing in a fucken dress under hot lights!! YOU THINK IT'S EASY?!?! NOT TO MINCHIN THE STUPID MUSIC!!!" Ukitake shouted back.

Kyoraku put his fist in the air "You tell him Jyuu!!"

Ukitake walked back stage again and tore off the dress then put on normal clothes. He walked over to Kyoraku and grabbed his wrist "Come on. You're going to help me to stop being mad…"

"Does this mean…?"


"FUCKEN SWEET!!!" Kyoraku pulled Jyuushirou back and picked him up. He then flash stepped away.

Yamamoto shook his head "I worry about them sometimes…"