Disclaimer: The Mario characters do not belong to me, they belong to Nintendo. The plot doesn't belong to me either, it's based on Hamlet, the quotable play by William Shakespeare. This goes for the whole story, and I shall not say it again.

Author's Note: I wrote a Mario adaptation of Shakespeare's Richard III because I felt the characters were a perfect fit, and rewriting the play really helped me understand it on whole new levels, which was a bonus for my schoolwork. Last year we did Hamlet in English class, and seeing as writing Bowser II had been so much fun, I decided to do the same to that play. However, it took me months to come up with a characterization that made sense, and even then it didn't seem to mesh as well as it did with Richard III. Therefore, I eventually decided to take a more humorous approach at writing Luigi, and it reads like a Hamlet parody. I then found myself too overwhelmed by homework to write the story last year, and I might never have taken on the initiative to write the whole thing months later had a friend not urged me onward. So I took advantage of the homework-less first week of winter break, and wrote the parody.

Rated T for violence, character death, coarse language and mature themes.

First of all, here's the cast of characters showing which Mario characters (in bold) are playing which Shakespearean characters. For those of you who aren't familiar with Hamlet, I've also included a bit of exposition about Shakespeare's characters, though these relationships don't necessarily translate into Luigi. Still, it should help anyone who does know Hamlet see what I've done to the story, and I hope you shan't be disappointed.

Cast of Characters

The Danes:

Hamlet, Prince of Denmark: Luigi
Old Hamlet, his dead father: Mario
Gertrude, his mother: Peach
Horatio, his best friend: Ludwig
Rosencrantz and Guildenstern, his other friends: Iggy and Lemmy (Bowser Jr. once)
Claudius, Old Hamlet's brother who then married Gertrude: Bowser

Polonius, Claudius' friend and second-in-command: Wario
Laertes, his son: Waluigi
Ophelia, his daughter: Daisy
Reynaldo, his servant / a sailor / a messenger: Larry

Marcellus, a guard: Roy
Bernardo, another guard / a gentleman: Wendy
Francisco, another guard: Toad
Cornelius and Voltimand, the ambassadors: Kammy
Gentleman / a guard: Toadette
Osric, a servant / a Lord: Morton
Priest: King Boo
Grave-Diggers: Hammer Bros.
Yorick, a deceased court jester: Toadsworth

The Foreigners:

Fortinbras, Prince of Norway: Prince Peasley
Fortinbras of Norway, his dead father: Queen Bean
Old Norway, his ailing uncle: Kamek
Captain, his second-in-command: Fawful

The pirates: King K. Rool and the Kremlings
English ambassadors: Donkey Kong and Diddy Kong
Actors: Yoshi and the Yoshis

All other characters are not listed (i.e. attendants, etc.).

Everything about why certain people are allies will be explained in the story, so don't worry. And, even though it is a bit obvious, Denmark is a conglomerate of Sarasaland, and the Koopa and Mushroom Kingdoms; Donkey Kong Island and its surroundings are England and Norway is represented by the Beanbean Kingdom.

Also, I am perfectly aware that I have used the same characters in Luigi as I did in Bowser II – in fact, I did it on purpose. Some characters who appeared in Bowser II but who are not listed in this cast (as it is much smaller than Richard III's personae) will appear as background characters. Another similarity between the characterization of the two Shakespeare fics is that the Koopalings are adults, but will not be described; just picture them as they are in the games, or use your imagination, either one will work for the story.

Finally, I shall address something that always comes up about my stories: I give Mario a thick Italian accent and leave Luigi's lines alone. The real reason I do it is because I like to make Mario into more of a comical character, with Luigi as the under-appreciated voice of reason. The in-story explanation is Luigi spent more time with their mother, while Mario hung out with their father, who was the one with the accent, which therefore rubbed off on Mario more than Luigi. I love contrived cop-outs.

Now, on to the story!