Bella Swan had an oral fixation; she just didn't know it yet. Edward Cullen on the other hand was convinced of it, especially after all the time and research he had put into proving just that point. He planned to use said research to convince Bella of something he was certain she would be unsure about.
It had started shortly after they had announced their engagement; she had taken to spending the time during classes and even after school when she studied sucking on a lollypop. After taking careful notice he realised that her obsession with the sugary treats followed a distinct pattern.
Anytime where they had to refrain from touching each other, like during classes or spending time with Charlie, she would unwrap one of the sweets and would spend the next half hour paying homage to it. By homage he meant tormenting his senses as she whirled, twirled and practically made love to the damn thing.
It was on one particular afternoon, a very hot and sticky afternoon, in which the entire family had opted to stay indoors to indulge in more leisurely pursuits that he decided to confront her. Enough was enough.
"Bella?" he asked, turning from the wall of CD's to study the beautiful woman who was currently flopped spread eagle across his bed, working the pink stick in and out of her mouth as she read from one of the sorriest looking novels he had seen in her hand for a while.
"Hmm?" she questioned, without looking up. The stick was pushed to the side of her mouth now, bouncing mid air as she flicked it with her tongue.
"So I have been brushing up on my psychology lately," he started, rubbing my hand across the back of my neck, "You know, not much has changed since I got that degree forty two years ago," he added.
"No, I suspect Freud knew it all when he said young boys lust after their mothers," Bella replied sarcastically. Edward took another glance at her book and realised she was reading Oedipus. Great, just great, one of the most analysed texts in existence and she just happened to be reading it.
"You never know, people mock some of his theories now, but in another forty years time his word could be gospel," he added, really not wanting to broach the subject he knew was coming.
"I highly doubt that," she offered, putting her book down, her hand going to the stick as she twirled it from one side of her mouth to the other, staring at him enticingly with her big brown eyes. Edward gulped and forced himself to think of Mike Newton in Mrs Cope's Sunday best.
"Yes, speaking of Freud actually, I was doing some research …" he started again, letting out an unnecessary puff of breath. If he could have, he would have blushed.
"I wondered why you had been holing yourself up in Carlisle's study so often these days," she smiled, crossing her legs beneath her as she studied me.
"He has a rather extensive library," he shrugged, not wanting to tell her that in the process he was running away from sinful thoughts of her mouth.
"And what did you research there?" she asked, catching on that he was having trouble spitting out what he wanted to say.
"Oral fixations," he mumbled, looking out of the window, avoiding her gaze.
"Pardon?" she asked, tilting her head.
"I have been researching oral fixations," he repeated, a little too loudly.
"Oh," she said, blushing furiously.
Trying to recover quickly, and make it seem as casual as possible, he turned it more into a lecture, rather than an educated conversation, "An oral fixation is a fixation in the oral stage of development manifested by an obsession with stimulating the mouth first described by Freud, who thought infants are naturally and adaptively in an oral stage, but if weaned too early or too late, may fail to resolve the conflicts of this stage and develop a maladaptive oral fixation. In later life, these people may constantly 'hunger' for activities involving the mouth."
"Oh," she repeated, slowly taking the stick from her mouth, "and who do you think has an oral fixation"
"You," he whispered, "I don't mean that in an offensive way, I don't want you to think I am saying Renee weaned you too early, or that you are strange or anything," he started to excuse, royally screwing up. He screwed his eyes shut and took another deep unnecessary breath.
"I don't have an oral fixation," Bella said, and Edward could have sworn she held laughter in her voice.
"The signs clearly point to it love, and I know it is often hard to accept personal faults. I have discussed this at length with Carlisle, and we both believe that the stress of exams and applying for colleges, the upcoming wedding and everything that is bound the follow has caused this repressed childhood reaction to return,"
"Edward, I don't have an oral fixation," she repeated.
"We can get through this together, I know with a bit of work and maybe a second opinion you can overcome this," he continued, looking at her now as he held both of her hands in his.
"I don't have an oral fixation!" she huffed, giving him an exasperated look.
"I expected you would experience some denial love, but this is me …" he didn't get to finish because she had grabbed hold of his forearm and was dragging him from the room. She didn't stop her furious marching until she reached the living room, where Jasper and Emmett sat huddled in front of the television playing a video game.
"Tell him," she growled at Emmett.
"Tell him what?" the large man asked without taking his face from the screen. His lips lifted in a smirk when he blew up a nondescript building.
"You know what; the whole house has probably heard what. Tell him he is wrong!" Bella ground out.
"Edward, Bella doesn't have an oral fixation," Emmett announced, laughter lacing his voice now.
"How would you know?" Edward asked incredulously.
"Because, Emmett and Bella have a bet, I think he just won," Jasper announced beside them. Edward turned on the blonde.
"How would you know?" he repeated, feeling at a complete loss. Everyone's thoughts were completely guarded and he was becoming increasingly agitated at being left out.
"I was here of course, and Bella now has to forfeit her truck for a much needed service,"
Edward looked between the three of them, Bella bright red with embarrassment, Emmett looking like the cat that got the canary and Jasper looking quietly amused as he killed off half of his opponents' battalion while his attention had wavered.
"So let me get this straight, Bella's oral fixation has something to do with Emmett and because of something I have just done he is going to service her truck?" Edward said slowly. All three nodded the affirmative.
"Oh stop being so cruel," Esme chided, entering the living room with a set of folded tablecloths tucked under her arms, on her way to the dining room.
"But it's so much fun," Emmett laughed, turning back to the television.
"You'll tell me what's going on won't you?" Edward pleaded with his adoptive mother.
"Of course dear," Esme smiled, "Bella was feeling upset after you had left to hunt one weekend and to cheer her up Emmett told her that the best way to get your attention was to …"
"Drive you insane with her mouth," Emmett finished with a booming laugh.
"I didn't believe him when he said that sucking on candy would work, so we made a bet," Bella said quietly, "I'm sorry Edward,"
"So you don't have an oral fixation?" Edward asked faintly, feeling slightly betrayed by his family.
"No, I don't have an oral fixation," she whispered, attempting to smile at him.
"Good, there isn't enough room for two of us in this relationship," he grinned at her, and when she frowned her picked her up and threw her over his shoulder, "Because I am pretty sure I have developed one myself," he teased and Emmett's booming laugh followed them all the way upstairs.
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