21 ways to annoy….

Summary: Each chapter is a list of how to annoy certain twilight characters. My first fan fic : ).Disclaimer: I do not own twilight, or any of the characters. Stephenie Meyer does.

By GloriaLapointeStead : ) enjoy.

Chapter 1-- Edward

1. If he asks where Bella is, tell him she ran off with Jacob.

2. Concentrate REALLY hard on dirty thought.

3. Throw holy water on him, wear garlic around your neck, and hold a cross out in front of you while saying the power of christ compels you.

him that Jacob thinks he's a sex god.

5. Ask him if you can chew on his arm.

6. Sit in his room and stare at him for hours.

7. If he asks you what your doing, say your not going to leave till he falls asleep.

8. If he tries to tell you he can't sleep, then say santa claus won't come, then proceed to stare at him.

9. Repetedly think the Pokemon theme song in your head.

10. Accuse Edward of making Jacob "happy" at night.

11. Somehow get Jacob to agree with your accusations in front of everybody

12. Force him to watch the 40 year-old virgin, and give him accusational glares throughout the movie.

13. Skip around the house singing 'Like a Virgin' by Madonna.

14. Hire a stripper to pop out of Edwards and Bella's wedding cake.

15. Show him the Twilight trailer and ask him if he thinks he looks like a pedophile, or if it's just you.

16. Picture yourself naked and covered in blood, and ask him if he wants you.

17. If he says no, scream "LIAR!" and run away crying.

18. Nail all his CD's and stereo to the ceiling, and refuse to take it down when he asks.

19. Cover his Volvo, and vanquish in honey and feathers.

20. Put banana's all over his house and say it was the banana monster.

21. If he gets mad at you for annoying him, turn to the person next to you and say, "it's his time of the month".

Hope you guys enjoyed this chapter. I'll try to update once a day (atleast), and eventually get all the twilight characters. Also, I'll just say this now, but I got most of these from other lists, so if some of them look familiar, that's why. Thanks : )

~GloriaLapointeStead