A/N- I see nothing wrong with writing a story to ring in the new year. Now, If Jericho gets hurt within the first month of 2009, we'll all know I cursed him.
"Chris, you coming?"
"No Cody Rhodes, I am not coming. I have more important things to do on New Years Eve than get wasted." Chris shot him a disgusted look as if he expected more from the rookie.
"What are you doing?" Cody was genuinely interested. It was unlike Chris to pass up getting drunk with the boys. It offered him a perfect chance to tell stories about how great he is.
"I'm writing a letter. I need you to be quiet. Leave." Chris turned back to his computer. He had only gotten the "Dear" part out when Cody interrupted.
"So you aren't going to be with us to ring in the new year?" Cody asked skeptically.
"No. Leave. I need some Jericho time." Cody shrugged and left. It'd be a shame the day Chris realizes his last name is Irvine.
Chris ignored the slamming door and immediately got back to his very important letter. He needed to get this typed so he could print it out. Email was not an option.
How are you? This is the sexy beast
writing you, something I knew thrills you to no end. I'm
sure by now you are wondering why I am writing this letter to you. The truth is, I just needed to talk to you. I think we need to make sure we are on the same page with each other. There is no doubt in my beautiful head that we are going to get along great. I know we haven't met each other yet, but that all will be changing shortly.
I want to be sure we are right for
each other. Me relationship with the one before you was amazing. We
got along like two peas in a pod. Did I tell you I was champion?
Twice? I was, and it warmed the hearts of every wrestling fan there
was. I cried when they cried when I lost the belt to that undeserving
imbecile. He also goes by Cena.
You know how I know we are going to get along real well? You took an early start to your position when you injured Dave, who also happens to molest guys in the ring. Just look at Batista and Cena vs Rhodes and DiBiase. You'll understand what I mean. I need you to keep actions like that up. I understand you have a demanding job, but honestly, it's only for a year. I think in that one short year you can help a brotha' out.
Obviously there is no one as great as me in the wrestling world, and since I obviously can't feud with myself, I'm asking that you produce a wrestler who is worthwhile my beatings. Let's face it, I already put away Michaels, Cena, Punk, Batista, Orton, Hardy, Bradshaw, Santino, Austin, Rock (Austin and Rock in the same night might I add), Angle, Lesnar, Storm, Christian, Edge, Hunter...basically everyone.
I don't think I am asking very much of you nine. All I am asking is for an exceptional year that tops the one I had last year. I have faith in you.
The Ayatollah, Sexy Beast, King Of The World, Y2J, King Of Bling Bling, Lionheart, Living Legend, Savior of the WWE,
Chris was proud of his letter. It was bound to do what he needed it to. He printed it out and searched for and envelope. He found one and put on a return address (he used Cody's in case this got into the wrong hands) but had trouble coming up with a senders address. Ten minutes later, he still didn't have an address so he decided to call the front desk.
"Front desk. This is Jane, how can I help make your stay here better?" Chris rolled his eyes at her obviously rehearsed answer.
"I need to know an address."
"What address do you need sir? I'll be glad to help you." She was really pushing the cheeriness, that much was obvious.
"I need the address for 2009." Chris stated, grabbing his pen so he could write it down.
"The address for 2009."
"I wrote 2009 a letter and need to send it before midnight." Chris explained, keeping his patience in tack.
"I don't think there is an address for 2009 sir." Jane told him. Why did she always have to deal with the drunk ones?
"No, there is. 2008 had an address."
"Which was where?"
"304 Picnic Drive, Louisiana."
"Oh." Poor woman was speechless.
"Come on lady, this is important. My future is in the hands of you."
"I don't know how to go about getting an address for something that isn't a person."
"Then what exactly do you call 2009?" Why did Chris always get stuck with the dumb people?
"A year." She said simply.
"WATCH YOUR MOUTH ASSCLOWN." Chris was beginning to lose his temper. It was 11:30, time was running out.
"Sorry sir. I can't help you." Before Chris could reply, Jane hung up and disconnected the phone. No one else was in the hotel anyway.
Chris cursed the phone for a good five minutes. He had to hurry. What else could he do? Call Cody.
"Three rings? Really jackass? Three damn rings. Did you not know it was me? Why don't you have your phone set so I have a separate ring tone?"
"Did you need something Chris?" Cody asked, ignoring the rant.
"I need the address for 2009."
"Tell me you didn't write a letter to 2009? Remember what happened when you wrote a letter to 2008?"
"I beat Shawn Michaels? One the belt twice? Won the hearts of millions?"
"Was put in custody because the police thought it was a threat." Cody offered, remembering the new year from last year.
"Not my fault."
"You sent the letter to the Governor of Louisiana's house." Cody pointed out.
"Not my fault." Really, how was Chris supposed to know that 304 Picnic Drive was the Governor's place? That's why this year he put Cody's address on it, for safety precautions.
"I can't help you, sorry Chris." Chris about threw his phone when Cody hung up. He had no choice but to come up with an address himself.
Now the question was, where in the world would 2009 start first?
"The North East." Chris decided. It was ahead of time compared to the rest of the US, which was good enough for him.
Now to pick a state.
"Massachusetts." Chris decided. It stuck out into the Atlantic a tad more than Maine did.
Now for the actual address.
"Boston." It only seemed natural to send it to the capitol. Chris wrote down on the decided address and took the letter down to the lobby and out the doors. There was an "out of town" mailbox across the street.
Chris said a quick blessing and put the letter to 2009 in the mailbox.
2009 was going to be a good year for him. He was smart enough to write a letter.
Good things will happen.
Just wait and see.