He says he's the same, but he's different.
I think that the Doctor knew he would be. But he left me with him anyway.
Him… the human Doctor. He's all right, but despite my best efforts, I can not manage to delude myself into finding the same man inside of the similar body, the familiar façade. He is merely similar; he could never be my Doctor.
I told him that I get off of work at five, but in truth, I get off at two and come here… a place beloved yet cursed to my heart.
Bad Wolf Bay.
It is the place where I lost the Doctor twice. I do not know which time was worse. The time where he left me alone, or the time that he left me with merely an empty reflection of himself.
Why couldn't I have gone back with him? Him and Donna could have used my company, couldn't they? I could have helped. Unless… is it possible that he did not like me anymore? What had I done? Nothing. That is the answer. The Doctor did not dislike people for no reason whatsoever. He had a kind heart, so kind that he gave even his enemies a second chance, an alternative, a way out. That was one of the many things that I loved about him.
Why was it that I loved him so much? After he did this to me? As realization dawned on me, I let out a scream. I covered my mouth so that nobody would hear. I screamed my throat raw, and still I screamed. I screamed until there were tears, and I burst into a coughing fit. Curled up into a fetal position in the sand, back against a boulder, arms wrapped around myself, I sobbed myself into unconsciousness. The terrible word that I felt toward him pressed fiery red into my mind:
I awoke to the sound of waves crashing upon the shore. But I felt a certain warmth in my heart that I had not felt in a long time. I realized that I was not alone. A hand brushed my blonde hair out of my face. I heard a familiar voice.
"Rose? Rose, are you all right?" I looked up into a familiar face.
"…Thomas…" I looked at my watch. Six. "Oh, I'm sorry-" I blubbered as he helped me sit up.
"Thomas… ah, that's the name that he chose. Sort of fitting for us, the name of a handsome man. Well, fitting for him. I would prefer another, possibly… Oh, I don't know. Always fancied the name Edgar after I met Edgar Allen Poe, back in 1978. Well technically, it was further back than that, but the actual year was 1978. Woah, should've seen my hair back then, it was- Rose?"
I stared up at him incredulously. Then, I noticed a blue box behind him. "Doctor, it's… it is really you. Are you…"
"Real?" he looked sad. "To be honest, Rose… no."
"Then how are you here?" I asked him, sitting up, holding my head.
He then went on into alien, scientific words that I was not familiar with. I smiled at him. When he was finished, he then looked at me. "What?"
"You're such a geek, alien boy... but you're my geeky alien boy"
He smiled back at me. Then his expression turned serious. "Look, Rose, I only have a few moments to be here, time is running out. But I let you be taken away from me twice and I have something to tell you. Something I could not say those two times.
"He looked deep into my eyes. "Rose Tyler, I love you."
I smiled, and felt better than I had in ages. "I-" And then he was gone. I reached out to where he had been, ignorantly hoping that he would still be there. He wasn't.
Yet this time, it didn't feel as bad. I knew he loved me and would never forget me. That no matter who he was with, he'd always keep me in the back of his mind.
I stood and walked home, gazing to where the TARDIS had been moments ago. I then looked to where the Doctor had been kneeling. Where he had been was a box, jewelry sized. Inside was a sonic screwdriver and a locket. Inside the locket was a picture of the two of us in front of the TARDIS taken a few years back. Tears fell down my face, but they were tears of happiness this time. I put the locket on, placed the sonic screwdriver in my pocket, and walked back to my car.
I learned that night that going back to Bad Wolf Bay was an unhealthy habit. That you can not hold on to the little things, because what really matters is and always will be in your heart. The Doctor and I had had our time, and now time was out. But the memories, they would last forever.