A/N: Finally, one that includes volume 2! Just fyi, it does contain a little bit of my own speculation on why there are the two dead bodies sitting in Finch's dining room.


I Luv Lie Detectors

Finch lay on the white fabric couch, not bothering to look his "doctor" in the eyes. He sighed. On a chair a few yards away from him sat Vivian, clipboard in hand, and a large machine that looked like one of those old humidifiers at her feet. The screen at the top was tilted to face her, and it came to about her knee. Finch laced his fingers together across his chest, bracing himself for the barrage of questions to come.

"'Kay, so they told me this thing was a Lie Detector, and it'll really tell me if you're lying to me or not, so don't try anything funny, got it?"

"Who said I'd try anything funny?" he asked, dryly. Vivian paid him no mind.

"Wonder if this thing really does work… Lessee…" she looked over the manual attached to her clipboard. "'Light goes off when lie is told; if no false statement is made, then no reaction will occur.' Kay, then, 'I think Finch is totally hot'." Long pause. "Uhh, right. So, uhm… q-questions! Yes, the… questions…" Fumbling of paper. Finch almost cared enough to turn around, but decided against it and kept focus on his toes.

Vivian cleared her throat. "So, how are you feeling?"

"What's it to you?"

"That's not the right answer!"

"'Right answer'?"

"Yeah, you gotta answer so the Lie Detector machine thingy'll tell me if you're lying or not! Try again: how do you feel?"

"Peachy." Lights and a short siren. Vivian shot up.

"Ha! You're lying!"

"No shit, Sherlock." She chose to ignore his last comment.

"Do you totally blame yourself for your sister's homicidal ways?"

"No." Siren.

"Do you think you're insane?"

"No." Siren.

"Did you kill your parents with that crowbar thingy?"

"No." Siren.

"Do you wish they'd come back?"

"As my zombie slaves." Siren.

"Do you wanna kill yourself?"

Finch's voice dripped with sarcasm. "Oh, yeah."


Vivian stared at the machine. "…Why isn't it going off…? It's supposed to tell me that you're lying… right?"

Finch got off the couch, not once looking Vivian in the eye. "If it told you what you wanted to hear, then it wouldn't be a Lie Detector, would it?"

He walked over to the door and shut it behind him, leaving Vivian in the silence, staring at the machine.