This was a special birthday present for JadedandBoring!! Love you!!

"Have a great day baby!" I yelled excitedly. When Bella turned around and looked at me I just smiled and waved.

"Edward…" she warned.

Play it cool I reminded myself. When she walked up to me with her eyes narrowed and her lips pursed, I kept smiling.

"I really don't want a party… I don't want to celebrate my birthday," she said.

I didn't understand why her turning twenty nine was that big of a deal. It wasn't like she was thirty or forty even. Bella hadn't ever had a problem celebrating birthdays in the past, and I couldn't figure out why this one had seemed to throw her out of whack.

"Bella, I just want you to have a good day," I said before kissing the top of her head.

She sighed and leaned against me as I wrapped my arms around her shoulders. After a few minutes I finally convinced her that I wasn't throwing a party. She left, promising that she would enjoy the spa package that I had gotten her. As soon as I saw her car backing out of the driveway, I made a mad dash for the phone.

"Yeah?" Jasper answered.

"She's headed your way to pick up Alice. I'll meet you at the party factory," I said quickly. I turned around in circles looking for my keys.

"Right-o!" he said in a lame fake British accent. Before I could comment on it, he hung up.

I shook my head and grabbed my wallet, running out the door. I smiled to myself as I made my way through traffic. I might actually pull this off. Bella would spend the entire day getting massaged and covered in mud with Alice. When she got home tonight, she would be totally relaxed and more than excited to see the surprise party I had planned for her.

** *** **

"How many balloons did you order?!" Jasper asked.

"Well they had a special going. If you ordered more then ten you got a discount or some shit, so I ordered twenty," I looked around at the several bunches of balloons that were waiting behind the counter. Someone else was probably having a party too.

"You dumbass!" Emmett laughed.


"You do realize that they meant more than ten dozen, right? You ordered twenty dozen balloons?" Jasper shook his head while looking at me.

"Twenty dozen isn't that bad… it's only…" I looked at both of them. Oh shit. I shook my head when I realized how many balloons that actually was.

"More than two hundred balloons! Your ass ordered over two hundred balloons!" Emmett roared. I stumbled forward when he slapped my back.

"How are you going to get these in your car?" Jasper asked. I could tell he was trying not to laugh at me. He was failing miserably.

I looked at the groups of balloons that were covered in black bags and shook my head. There was no way that I could get all of these in my car. Hell I probably couldn't get half of them in all three of our cars. I took a deep breath and smiled. This wasn't going to be a problem. This place had to deliver… I would just pay the extra fee and have them deliver all of them. It wouldn't be that bad, I could spread them out through the house. It would be fine.

"Hey, you deliver right?" I asked the cashier as she was ringing me up.

"Yes sir. There is a fifty dollar charge, but we can deliver them this afternoon."

"Do it," Emmett nodded. "Fork over the extra cash."

I rolled my eyes at him, and gave the girl my credit card. "I need them delivered before three. Will that be a problem?"

"It shouldn't be."

I smiled and looked back at my friends. "See, problem solved."

** *** **

Things were not going according to plan… at all. I kept telling myself to calm down, that everything would work out and that we had more than enough time. But the more shit that kept going wrong, the more annoyed and frustrated I got.

The balloon ordeal wasn't so bad in comparison to what had happened when I went to pick up the hors d'oeurves I had ordered. Not only had I once again, ordered way more than I needed, but I also ordered food that apparently had finely chopped up celery in it. This wouldn't have been so disastrous if it wasn't for the fact that my wife was highly allergic to it.

"Okay I can't use this," I muttered to the caterer. "What else do you have?"

"Excuse me?" She asked.

Did she have a fucking hearing problem? "I said I can't use this. My wife is allergic to celery… what else do you have?"

"Mr. Cullen this isn't some sort of grocery store. We don't keep party platters of cheese and meats on standby. I don't have time to make you…"

"Wait! Wait! You can buy party platters? Where?!" I asked, interrupting her.

Apparently my interest in grocery store party platters had offended her, because I was asked to leave. She shouldn't have cared. I paid her for an ass load of food that I couldn't even fucking use. So with three pans full of over priced food in the trunk of my car, I hauled ass to the grocery store.

When I found a tray of meats and cheeses, and another with fruits and vegetables I grabbed them. As I drove home I thought that maybe, just maybe, things would get back on track. That was until Jasper called me.

"Did you mean to order all black balloons?" He asked me.

"Uh…" I tried to think back to when I placed the order. I thought I had said black and purple, but I honestly couldn't remember. "I think it was supposed to be black and purple. Why?"

"Well we are at your house, trying to decorate with two hundred and forty black balloons. It looks like a funeral," Jasper explained.


He sighed. "Edward you do know that people decorate with black for people's fortieth and fiftieth birthday's right? Like a mourning type thing? You know… getting old?"

"Oh fuck," I groaned and threw my head back against the head rest.


"Well… can we not make it look better? I mean isn't black supposed to be timeless and classic?" I asked him. It wasn't normally my style to know that shit, but I had been dragged to five different stores last weekend while Bella looked for a pair of "classic and timeless" black shoes. "It's already four; people are supposed to be at the house at five-thirty. We don't have time for this bullshit."

Jasper was quiet for a second. "Let me see what I can do. Where are you?"

"I'll be there in like fifteen minutes. I just have to go pick up the cake."

We hung up and I took a calming breath. "It will be fine. It will all be fine."

I ran into the bakery and picked the cake up, then sped back to the house. When I walked inside I realized that none of this would be "fine". It looked… horrible. I sat the cake on the counter and walked into the living room. Jasper was studiously popping balloons, while Emmett was inhaling the helium and singing the munchkin song from the Wizard of Oz.

"This is your plan?" I asked them. "You're just going to pop balloons?"

"Well I figured that if we didn't use as many, then maybe it wouldn't be as bad," Jasper explained.

"Yeah," Emmett chirped. His voice was high and distorted.

"Then just let them go! Open the back door and they will float away!" I yelled. Did they not understand that we were on a time crunch?!

"That is so bad for the environment," Emmett said in his chipmunk voice.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "Are you kidding me with that?"

"No man he's serious. It can kill the seals if they eat it and choke on it. Not to mention the birds and other wildlife that could be affected," Jasper lectured.

"Okay fine, pop the fucking balloons. Emmett can you please go get the party platters out of the back of my car and get the food ready? There is food in the trunk that we can set out, but we can't use it. It has celery in it."

"Bella's allergic to celery," Emmett said.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. "Yes… I know."

While Emmett dealt with the food I ran into the bedroom and changed clothes. I made sure that my dirty clothes weren't left on the floor; I was trying to be better about doing that shit, and double checked my shirt in the mirror.

After a quick glance at the clock I walked into the office. I pulled open my desk drawer and got out the card that I had gotten for Bella. I didn't have time to write a full out love letter, and honestly I think we were past that phase. So I just told her the truth, that I loved her and had no idea what I would do if she wasn't in my life. I smiled as I pulled out the small brochure that the travel agent had given me, and tucked it into the card. With twenty minutes to spare, I walked back into the kitchen and tapped the card on the counter while I looked around. The food was laid out, and Emmett was opening the box to the cake. We could do this.

"Who's Bedford?" Emmett asked. He looked up at me and then back down at the cake.


"This cake says, 'congratulations Bedford'. You picked up the wrong cake dude," he shoved the box across the counter for me to look at.


Jasper came walking into the room and shook his head when he saw the cake. "It's fine; just scrape the top part off. We can put the fruit on top of it."

I groaned as they started working on it. I was being punished; Karma was kicking my fucking ass. Bella said she didn't want a birthday party, and instead of listening to what she had said I just did what I wanted. Was I ever going to fucking learn?

My phone started ringing and I pinched the bridge of my nose as I answered it. "Yeah?"

"Edward!" Alice whispered harshly.

"Alice?" I looked at Jasper. He shrugged at me. "What… where are you? Why are you whispering?"

"You have got to cancel the party!" She said a little louder. My heart fell to the floor. "Bella was getting her hair highlighted and… it didn't turn out well. At all."

"What do you mean? Alice…"

"Edward her hair is green! GREEN!" She yelled.

I stared at the wall in front of me. "What…"

"She's about to be back in here! Just do what I said! Cancel the fucking party!"

Before I could say anything she had hung up the phone. I looked at Jasper and Emmett who were almost done with the cake and freaked out. "MOTHER FUCKER!" I yelled and threw my phone down on the counter.

"What happen?!" They both yelled together.

"We have to… get all of this out of here!" I ran into the living room and started trying to herd the massive amount of balloons into the coat closet.

"What happened?" Jasper ran after me. "Edward…"

"We have to cancel the party! Bella's hair is… green or something. I don't fucking know!" I shut the closet door and grabbed another handful of balloon streamers and ran into the guest room. "Jasper, can you start calling people? I don't… fuck I don't even know who all I invited!"

Emmett started helping while Jasper assured me he would take care of it. Not giving a shit about the environment I opened the back door and started shoving balloons outside. The seals could fucking deal with it.

"Alice just texted me," Jasper yelled from the living room. "They're about five minutes away!"


If it wasn't total chaos before, it was now! The three of us were running through the house trying to wave the last of the balloons out of the doors.

"Emmett, get the food! GET THE FUCKING FOOD OUT OF HERE!" I yelled.

He nodded and grabbed the pans of over priced celery food and ran out to his car. I shoved the rest of the party platters at Jasper and pushed him out of the door. "Stay here and keep people from ringing the door bell! Tell them I'm sick… or… fuck! Just get rid of them!"

After I shut the door, I ran back through the house trying to make sure that it was balloon free. I stopped when I got to the kitchen. The cake! They left the fucking cake! I picked it up and ran back and forth, wondering what to do with it. When I saw headlights pull into the driveway I stopped. A cake was normal! I could have easily just gotten a cake because I liked cake. It made sense! I sat it back on the counter and ran into the living room. I turned the TV on and fell into my chair. When the side door open, I took a deep breath and tried to appear normal.

I heard a quiet knocking on the window behind me and saw Emmett hiding behind the bush. I waved him away and turned back around just in time.

"Bella it really isn't that bad," Alice said encouragingly. "They can fix it Monday… no big deal."

I prepared myself for whatever Bella was going to look like, and was determined not to laugh… or frown… or show any sign of emotion to her hair. I would look indifferent, and just reassure her that she was beautiful.

"I look ridiculous!" She yelled and threw her purse onto the dining room table. I smiled when she walked into the living room and immediately regretted it. "Don't you fucking smirk at me Edward Cullen!"

I blinked and shook my head, looking at Alice for support. "I didn't…"

The second that Bella covered her face with her hands and started crying I shot up out of the chair and wrapped my arms around her. She cried against my chest and muttered apologies. I kissed the top of her green streaked hair and told her it was fine.

"I just… I want to go to bed," she whimpered against my shoulder. I nodded and after apologizing again, she walked back into the bedroom.

"What the fuck!" I whispered harshly.

Alice shook her head. "What did you want me to do?! Edward she is fucking pissed! Where is Jasper?"

"He's outside making sure people don't ring the door bell!" I said a little louder than I meant to.

She shushed me and I rolled my eyes. "Go check on Bella…"

We both looked towards the kitchen when we heard the side door open again and took off through the house. I nearly knocked Rosalie over as she was coming into the house. I covered her mouth to keep her from screaming while Alice held her finger over her lips.

"What the…" Rosalie whispered.

"Hey, do you guys want to order dinner?" Bella yelled from our bedroom.

Alice whispered she would deal with Rosalie. I ran into the bedroom just as Bella was starting to walk out. She ran into my chest and I held onto her arms to keep her from falling.

"Easy," I laughed, hoping like hell I seemed normal.

"Where's Alice?" Bella asked. I followed her back into the bathroom and watched she pulled her hair up into a messy knot.

"She's um… outside. I think she's calling Jasper," I lied. Well technically she was talking to Jasper, so I guess it wasn't a full lie. I moved so that I was standing behind Bella and kissed the top of her head. She leaned back against me, and even when I smiled at our reflection she just kept frowning. "Honey, it isn't that bad," I whispered. "You're beautiful. You always are."

"You're just saying that to make me feel better. I look… horrible."

"It isn't just the hair, what's wrong Bella?" I asked. She shrugged as I wrapped my arms around her. "You've been unhappy for a while and I know it isn't just your birthday. Tell me what's wrong."

"It's stupid," she muttered.

"Please tell me," I kissed her shoulder.

Bella took a deep breath and turned around to look at me. "I'm almost thirty."

"Okay? And?" I asked.

"That only gives us ten years Edward." She said quietly. She looked at me like I was supposed to understand what she was talking about. I had no clue. "They say that women shouldn't have children past the age of forty! What if… what if we waited too long? Ten years isn't that long and… what if it takes longer than we thought…"

"Bella," I said calmly.

"I know we made that whole list of things we wanted to do before we had kids, but Edward we're running out of time!"

"There is only one thing left on the list," I smiled. I rubbed her shoulders, trying to make her relax. She rolled her eyes and shook her head. She wasn't going to make this easy. "Bella, I…"

"I don't need to see Europe, Edward! That isn't who I am… I mean… I would love too, but it just isn't a possibility right now!"

"What? Why?" I asked. "Bella I…"

"Because we already know that this isn't going to be easy Edward!" She yelled over me. "The doctor said it could take years… and now… what if takes too long?!"

"I already got the tickets for Europe!" I yelled back at her.

Bella stared up at me and I shook my head. This was definitely now how I wanted this to happen. I wanted her to be surprised and excited, not freaked out and the verge of a panic attack.

"You…" she whispered.

I nodded and sighed. "I got them for your birthday and our anniversary. I was going to tell you tonight."

"So… we're going?" She asked. Her face was lit up with a smile.

"We're going."

She squealed and threw her arms around my neck. I laughed as she kissed me and apologized for being so irritable lately. "It's fine Bella, I just… why wouldn't you talk to me about this? You said yourself that doctors don't know everything."

Her shoulders shrugged as she shook her head. "I don't know…"

"Bella, I…"

We were interrupted by the door bell ringing. I felt my eyes widen as Bella moved out from under my arms and walked back into the bedroom.

"Do you think Alice locked herself out? You weren't expecting anyone were you?" She asked.

I tried to get her to stay in the bedroom and let me see who was at the door, but of course that shit didn't work. Before I could stop her, she was pulling the front door open. I groaned and let my head fall backwards as my mother yelled "happy birthday" from the front porch.

"What…" Bella looked past her and my father. Our entire front yard was covered with people, while Jasper and Emmett were trying, unsuccessfully, to turn people away.

"Are you surprised, honey?" My mother asked and pulled Bella into a hug.

"Very," Bella muttered and looked back at me.

"I…well…" I mumbled. I shrugged my shoulders and smiled. "Happy Birthday."

Bella looked back into the front yard and pulled the door the rest of the way open. I stood aside as people started coming in and smiled pathetically. My mother grabbed onto my arm and leaned in to me.

"Is her hair green on purpose?" She quietly asked.

"Just… don't bring it up," I muttered. She nodded her head and kept moving into the house.

Other than the fact that I had thrown a party when Bella had specifically asked me not to, things went well. People seemed to have a good time, and no one mentioned her green hair. After Alice and Jasper left, I quietly shut the front door and walked back into the bed room. Bella was throwing the decorative pillows onto the floor, and stopped when she saw me standing in the doorway.

"I'm sorry…" We said at the same time.

I raised an eyebrow and she smiled.

"I… Thank you… for throwing a party for me," she said. I watched as she got into bed and fidgeted with the blankets. "I didn't think I would want to celebrate, but I had fun. Even with the green hair…"

"The green hair is… kind of sexy," I shrugged. She rolled her eyes as I crawled onto the bed next to her. "No I like it. It's like… punk rock-ish."

"You're a horrible liar, but I love you," Bella laughed.

I smiled when she leaned down to kiss me. "Happy birthday baby," I whispered and kissed her back.

A/N: Aw… a little Assward makes everything better! Just to let you guys know, I have started posting chapters for the prequel. The story is called When Assward met Bella. If you were wondering about the sequel… well this is kinda part of it, but I will be posting it once the prequel is finished.