A/N: So this one came to me while I was getting ready for bed last night. It's a one-shot but written Dr. Seuss style. I thought it'd be funny. I hope you think so too! LOOOVE!

Disclaimer: I do not own any portion of or ideas from Stephenie Meyer's books. I only wish I did.


Hunting Trip

It was six in the morning at the Cullen house, and each and every occupant was snuggled up with their spouse. The rooms were quiet, and the fireplace hot, because the girls liked the heat from the fire quite a lot. The teens had the house all to themselves, not before Esme had threatened, "Behave yourselves." It was not like they had gotten in trouble before, it was just that simple things were not amusing anymore. It took bigger things to keep them amused. "Bigger things that involve minor destruction," Emmett laughed, enthused. And so, after many promises of behaving were made, into the distance their parents' figures did fade.

Outside, the sun was beginning to rise, while big, burly Emmett practiced crossing his eyes. His lover, Rosalie, turned and let out a snort, "You look like an idiot, I'm sad to report."

"It's okay," replied Emmett, a grin on his lips. "You look like a bitch with your hands on your hips." Rosalie reached over to Emmett and gave him a smack, to which he smartly replied, "Aww come on, cut me some slack." Rosalie sighed as her eyes fluttered shut, and she snuggled up to Emmett.

"You're such a damn nut..."

Now down the hall, through the second door to the right, was pixie-like Alice, who was all dressed in white. She sat on the lap of Jasper, who's hair she did fix, saying, "I can't believe Emmett was up to his tricks. How did he get all this glue in your hair?"

"Believe me, I have no idea, and I was friggin' there." Jasper sighed as Alice worked with amazing speed. Removing glue with shampoo? No, there was no need. Alice was in her element, even when it was early. Even when the hair she was cleaning was sticky and curly.

Past this room, at the end of the hall, were the last two in the house, one short and one tall. Bella lay under the covers, tucked in and quite warm, while Edward filled out the Cullen's tax form. "I hate doing taxes, because now it takes no time at all. I've done it so many times that I can't even stall. Look, I've been writing for ten minutes and I'm already done."

"So now we have more time for some fun..." Bella wagged her eyebrows as if to suggest that she was not all so pleased that she was currently dressed.

Suddenly, Emmett appeared at the door, dressed in jeans and a shirt. His eyes were black and he looked quite alert. "No getting naked, now, and Edward, don't grunt. I'm pretty damn hungry, and I'm going out to hunt. The others are coming too, so if you so please, hunting in twos is no where near as fun as hunting in threes."

Bella's eyes lit up, the red lighting on fire, considering that hunting she would soon require. "Better sooner than later," she said with a smile. "I haven't been hunting in a really long while."

Ten minutes later, the teens left the house with a leap, darting past Edward's Volvo and Emmett's new Jeep. Moments later, they were surrounded by trees, and the mouthwatering scent set their nerves at ease. The forest was still full of food, to the brim, and so their moving situation no longer looked grim.

"To the left," hissed Bella, who swerved off their path. Moments later an animal growled, a clear sign of it's wrath. Bella's snarl rang through the air in sharp reply.

"Dear Jesus, it's like that girl can fly," said Emmett to his brothers, grinning as he ran past. The others followed quickly; they were so very fast.

Rosalie was the first to find Bella chasing the bear, and with out hesitation, she made one hunter a pair. She and Bella grinned together as they closed the gap with ease, and they took the animal down with much expertise. The others closed in as quick as a blink.

"Thank God, I was hungry. Now there's something to drink," said Alice with a smile as she tied back her hair. It was more than clear that today they'd each get their share.

And when they meal was done, their eyes a new hue, Emmett grinned wildly, "Who's up for round two?"


A/N: Just a short. It was fun to write. I hope you liked it too! Let me know! :) LOOVE.