I miss falling asleep to your voice. I miss listening to you run, even though you didn't make any noise at all. I miss the way you would hold me as close as possible, but still as gentle as you would hold a plume, as if you thought you would break me. The thing that I miss the most about you, however, is the reality that you're miles away and it doesn't even matter. It would never, could never, and won't ever matter because once in my life, despite your unfathomable disgust of yourself, you were everything to me.
I've tried, believe me. I've tried so impossibly hard that there were times when
I could have sworn my mind was going to detonate. If trying was an Olympic sport, then I would have taken the gold. But no matter how immense my effort, I just cannot stop loving you.
Before I seal this envelope with my tears, there are a number of things that I have to say to you. Firstly, your eyes are the most brilliant color that I have ever seen. I will never look into another set of eyes and surreptitiously melt inside like I did every time that you glanced in my direction. When you would gaze into my eyes, roaming to the depths of my heart, you would say a million things without a trace of noise. My life was inevitably devoted to the cadenced pounding of your striking heart.
And now I lay in a meadow filled with my own sinister thunderstorm. You taught me more than I ever thought I was capable of learning, just by being in my life. You taught me much more by leaving me. More than anything else, your absence has taught me that it is a long way back when your dreams are high as mountains. Even though I know that you will never return, I just wanted to let you know that I never will get over you. I will always want to feel your cool skin against my neck, and the scorching intensity of your topaz irises. And as I lay here surrounded by the ominous thunder, I secretly wonder if somewhere, somewhere far away, vampires are playing baseball.