Title: Bev's Lucky Day
Summary: Bev has won a tour of the set of Doctor Who - and with it the chance to meet some gaaaaaaaaawgeous men.
Disclaimer: I don't own Little Britain.
Author's Note: You need to know your Doctor Who to appreciate this.
It's ten past Auntie Harriet, and woman Bev has won a private tour of the set of Doctor Who. It's really rather a dull place if you ask me.
(Bev is walking through the set of the TARDIS with her guide – a man with a beard.)
Bev (to the guide): I was never really interested in the early episodes, but I really got into it during the Peter Davison era...
Guide: Yes, very good. Well Bev, I'm afraid this brings us to the end of the tour. But before you go, I've got a few people to introduce you to.
(They approach a line of people.)
Guide: This is the outgoing executive producer, Russell T Davies.
(Bev politely shakes Russell's hand.)
Guide: Next to him is his co-producer, Julie Gardner.
Bev: Nice to meet you.
Guide: And moving along, we have the current Doctor, David Tennant.
(David is smiling at Bev.)
David: Hi there, Bev.
Bev (turning to the guide): Oh 'e's gaaaaaaawgeous! Oo, wha' a hunk! A bit skinny, but that don't bother me! Phwoar! And wha' a sexy accent, eh? Oo, 'e is lush. 'E can fiddle around with my TARDIS any day!
Guide: Er, right. Anyway, next we have former companion and star of Torchwood, John Barrowman.
John (grinning): Hey, nice to meet you.
Bev: Oh 'e's gaaaaaaaaaaaaaawgeous! Look at that jawline! Very fit, too, and wha' a lovely tan! 'E really is gaaaawgeous! Phwoooar!
Guide: And finally, we have a bit of a special guest today. The 9th Doctor, Christopher Eccleston, has dropped in for a visit.
(Chris stands there.)
(The guide leads Bev away from the line.)
Guide: So Bev, what do you think about the decision for the 11th Doctor?
Bev: I'll be devastated to see David go – he's gaaaaaaawgeous!
Guide: Yes, but what about his replacement? Have you seen any of his work?
Bev: Uh, who is it again?
Guide: Matt Smith.
Bev: Matt Smith, Matt Smith...
(Bev stares into space for a moment, trying to remember. Finally, she turns back to the guide.)
Bev: Oh 'e's gaaaaaaaaaaaaawgeous!