Title: Game of You

Rating: M(hear that, kiddies? Under 16? Get the hell out![I'm kidding, of course.])

A/N: Been a long time, good old fanfiction…been a long time… Where has the days gone? Oh, yes, in school…well, my old friend, I've trusted you all along. True, there are some…oh, some changes, but I'm sure nothing I can't handle. Lets hope I become somewhat accepted into a fandom, I'm embarrassed to say, quite new in. This is incrediablly messy and I'm not sure if it's much good, but its a start for a comeback. To everyone who sees this, thank you for reading and thank you doubly for reviewing!

"I understand that you think that this…oh, what to call it…relationship is healthy, but please, it isn't. It really isn't."

"Oh, Harley-poo!"

Her baby blues peeked over her crimson glasses to rest upon her wickedly beloved. A smile creased her summer-fresh face. True, it could never physically match her pudding's grin, but in spirit, it was just as pure. From her seat on the purple dressed bed, she could see his full height. In her rose-tinted eyes, he was like a god, and she hoped that every moment of his life, he knew it.

Joker winked at her as he leaned against the doorframe. With one hand he threw his coat onto the floor while the other rest away from her view. With her curiosity igniting, she wondered what he could possibly be hiding from her. It was then she realized she must look like a mess. Her hair was in a tangled bun and her only clothing was a long t-shirt. The usual feeling of unworthiness fell over her, but she held it back with a wide grin.

"Welcome back, Puddin'!" She said as she took off her glasses. "What are you hidin'?"

His soft chuckles caused goose bumps to prickle her flesh. She cooed to herself.

"Just a little something for my Harley-girl." His smile turned into a small smirk as he gracefully strode over to her.

With a glee of excitement, she jumped to her feet and tried to sneak a peek behind Joker's back. With every attempt he'd turn to block it. He was always one for gifts. Expensive (stolen) jewelry, new (stolen) outfits, even beautiful (stolen) art pieces from time to time. It seemed to make up for the bruises sometimes left on her body…

His smile opened up once again when he presented her with a bouquet of white and red roses tied with a black ribbon.

"Oh…Puddin'..."Harley gasped, "They are so…!"

Her prize literally sparkled from the moon coming in through the sky light.

"Fragile, Harley." He accented the first word, making his point across. "Glass is breakable, so don't drop them. I know how much of a ditz you are, so I've made sure you don't have to remember to water them."

Somehow she worked the insult into the highest compliment she had ever received. Diamonds were these glass roses' dew drops and polished emeralds were the thorns. Her heart swelled while her throat clutched.

Rising her gaze, for a moment she saw Joker's appearance change. He seemed so much softer and she longed to touch him. With a small smile, he started to reach his hand out to her face, but pulled back. This was the first time she had ever seen him unsure of his actions. He must have changed his thoughts, for he again reached out for her. With the softest motion, he pushed a rouge strand of hair behind her ear. She allowed her eyes to flutter close, her breath to escape, and her grip on her gift to tighten.

"I know how men can be, Harl', so please be careful. You are so young and inexperienced that you might take gifts for love and violence for acceptance…"

"Mistah J…"She managed "Oh, Mistah J…I love…"

With that, he was himself again. He swiftly walked to the middle of the one room hideout and threw out his arms.

"The new hideout?" He incorrectly finished her sentence. "Oh, I do too. It reminds me of a childhood of jokes and gags. Doesn't it?"

It did, she noted to herself. Polka dotted floors, flashing show lights, a bed of purple stripes, and trap doors she still couldn't get used to. It was all good and fun, yes, but it wasn't exactly…a home.

"Did a package come for me, Poopsy?" He asked as he jumped on to the couch in front of their (stolen) large screen television.

She let out a sad sigh and looked at her flowers. Couldn't there be some sign other than presents and pet names? Couldn't she, just once, find the courage to say those three simple words? No use crying over it. She knew just as everyone else did that her man preferred jests over hearts. She placed her gift in a (stolen) vase Joker gave her.

"Yes, Mistah J. Some big ol' guy with a green hat came by around noon." She said as she sat down next to him.

Suddenly the air got tight around her and him. Slowly he turned to look at her. Putting on a tight smile, he looked her up and down.

"You weren't…wearing…that…were you?" He said through his teeth.

"Of course I was, Mistah J." She gulped. "I wouldn't want anyone comin' around knocking and seein' me in my baddy get-up."

With a growl, he jumped to his feet, pulling her by the hair with him. It was happening again. As he started to choke her, she stared into the green flames in his eyes. She knew once again she must have messed up…she couldn't understand why she just couldn't do things right!

"Mistah J, I'm sorry!" She cried as he pressed his thumbs deeper into her neck. "I just figured…"

"Well Harley…poo…"He said, "Don't figure…know! Do you really think I would allow anyone who doesn't know that we are here to be delivering something? And do you really think that I would like you to answer the door to someone who knows that I, the Joker, and you, the Joker's…"

There was an awkward pause as she gasped for breath. Snarling, he threw her to the ground and stormed to the other side of the room to the bed. Holding back tears of embarrassment and shame, she wished she had thought more about something as stupid as this.

"You are too naive to realize that maybe…just maybe…he doesn't care for you like he says he does. Think, girl, about how he treats you. I know you haven't ever experienced something like this, but I have, and I know how it ends. I know you won't be able to handle. Walk away while you can."

Getting to her feet, she shyly made her way to Joker's side. Laying herself down beside him, she questioned whether or not to put her arms around her, whether or not to say she was sorry, or whether or not to just walk away…no, she couldn't do that. She wouldn't leave…

He had his body seated against the headboard, his eyes closed, his arms pressed against his chest. His hair was slightly out align…the normal feeling crawled over her. She wanted to kiss him. In his happy moments, when he wasn't angry at her, when he was a villain only to the rest of humanity, things were ok. When they were flying through the city, he would allow himself to grab hold of her and kiss her. It was like he wanted the world to know that the Clown King had himself a Clown Queen…he would just never tell her this.

Could love be silent? Could love just be physical? Could love just be…unspoken? She wasn't sure that she could even count this relationship as stable. But when she asked herself this, things stopped making sense. Her mind became a shaken snow globe with her falling around Joker in a million broken pieces. Damn it, she'd constantly tell herself, what happened to your well-earned psychology degree? Alright, maybe not well-earned, but still.

But, God, did he look beautiful. Everything about him drove her mad. The wrinkled laugh lines around his eyes, his trim body, and those lips…

"Mistah J." She whispered.

"What?" He sharply spat. "What could you possibly want, Harley-poo, Harley-dear, Harley-kins?!?"

"How do you make a clown laugh?"

His eyes flickered opened and his body shifted towards her. Those creamy green eyes burned into her. A secret fire was lit.

"I'm not sure, Punk'ins..."He moaned. "How?"

"You know I'm only looking out in your best interest, Harley. I know I have no right to talk. But a man who only wants you for your…talents and not truly for you isn't the right man for you."

"Like this." She whispered.

She slide onto his lap and pressed herself against him. He sharply inhaled and with it produced a chuckle. Soon, his chuckle turned into laughter, quickly escalating in manic hysterics. Grabbing her shoulders, he threw her down onto her back.

"I know men like the Joker. They'll make you feel special. Like you are the only girl they'll ever love. Like your body is the best feeling thing in the world."

Joker threw himself between her legs. She cried out as the pressure of his being stabbed against her. Causing immense joy from it, he thrusted his uncovered bulge against her again, her hips thrusting for entrance. Bringing her hands down to his belt, she tried to unbuckle her master. Fumbling around with it, she moaned as he bit down on her neck. Her lips were practically screaming for him to inhale her in. Their call went unanswered.

"Any man who takes himself over you, any day, anytime, isn't a guy who is looking for long term."

Ripping away her covering, he chuckled again just out of spirit. Lowering himself down, onto his knees, he traced her figure with his nails, each stroke pressing deeper. Soon, small lines of blood followed his trails as he started over and over and over again. Turning away, she bit her cheek to stop from telling him it hurt her.

"But once he has what he wants, he is no longer playing a game of you."

Rising up straight, he brought himself inside of her. Harley groaned at the full feeling. Peeking through slotted eyes, she watched his chest heave and his body thrust. He had her by the hips, not allowing her to make her own moments or run at her own speed. Longing for his warm body against hers, she wished he would kiss her. She wanted to go slow and steady with love dripping from their pores and birds chirping and the moon shining and the happily ever after sign overhead.

"The scariest part is most men aren't even like the Joker. Harley…the Joker is worse."

Joker's head shot back as he slammed his final effort against her body. His relief of climax soon turned into his manic laughter. Finally, he left her and fell next to her. Sweat was dripping from his body and his shirt was a wrinkled mess. His chest lifted with a mix of breath and humor. What was so funny? What was so humorous? How could this be anything remotely laughable? She looked up to the skylight, looking to the moon. The silent glow covered her nakedness and reminded her she was a person.

Unexpectedly, his large hand was on her stomach and his pale face near her ear. There was no more laughter, but just calming, soft breaths. Facing him, she found him slowly falling into a hazy slumber. His hand shifted to her hip when adjusted to her side. With a defeated sigh, she placed her shaking hand on his smooth face.

"Just so you know, Mistah J," She said, her voice heavier than normal, "I'm…I…"

She couldn't do it. Staring back at him, she started to see things as they truly were. His head became a dizzy mess as she saw the Joker resting near her. He was a murdered. He was a killer…she had witness death because of him. The worst part, she had enjoyed it. She enjoyed the metallic smell of fresh blood flooding the streets. It frighten her. But before she could run and return to a life of useless normalness, she heard the Joker's voice, low with ecstasy.

"I love you, Harl." His final waking breath produced.

She sucked in a breath, not believing what she heard. With the Clown Prince asleep, she couldn't ask questions, and he couldn't see her reaction. If he could, though, it would have been the biggest smile Gotham had ever seen.

"Just promise me that you won't fall for his tricks? If you ever need any one, you know where to find me. No matter how angry I seem at you, I won't be mad.

Love, Ivy"


The bricks were dripping with Harley's blood. She didn't want to be the one who told the Joker that his men had betrayed him. With her luck, she'd probably be too dead to do it, anyway.

"Feel that, bitch?" The lowlife hissed as her. "Ya like the feeling on being stomped on?"

The others laughed as he made his cruel observation. One held her arms against the wall while another held her feet.

"Aw, she maybe a lil' slut for the boss, but she sure gots some nice tits." Said the one holding her hands.

"My angle ain't too bad either." Said the one at her feet, producing a rousing round of laughter.

"Excuuuuse me!" A high pitched song echoed in the alley. "Those tits are mine!"

Suddenly the gangster who had been beating her to a pulp was airborne a few feet away. The two holding her down ran to their buddy's side. Now in front of her was God himself. True, she could only see out of one eye, but still the sight was holy.

"Puddin'!"She sighed as she fell to the ground.

"Hold on, Harley-Poo." He knelt down to her. "I have to have a heart to heart with my boys."

Placing a quick kiss on her forehead, he stood and barred his two very large, very powerful guns. Coming close enough to be frightening to the men, he shot two warning shots into the air, and pointed the gun at the three men.

"Oh…boys, boys, boys…"He scowled. "Daddy's is very, very, very mad at you. Mommy and I work all day to make you well behaved individuals and then you go and be naughty. Daddy's very, very, very ashamed."

The man who had been holding her arms stood up and pulled out a handgun. Joker looked it over, cocking his head, and grinned. The gangster tried to look tough by taunting him with it. It wasn't long before the Joker was in loud, cackling laughter.

"Wha-what's so funny?" The man's hand was shaking as he held the gun up. "Stop, stop…I'll kill you! I swear I'll pop your ass, man!"

Joker was now bent over with laughter. His hands were on his knees, a sore attempt at holding himself up. Soon, even she joined in with his manic laughter.

"Harl…haha, did you…haha, oh my, haha…" Joker tried to catch his breath. "He said,haha,…he said he'd kill me…haha! The Joker! He wants to kill the Joker!"

"I heard him, Mistah J!"She responded with a louder laugh.

"Oh, haha, oh boy…you, my good man, you are a funny one." He caught his breath and sighed. "Too bad I have to kill you."

With that he shot the man three times in the chest and then turned to the other two. The other one who had kept her bound ran to him and tried to stab him with a knife, but was met with the Joker's foot in his chin and the knife in his throat. Then there was silence.

"Now for you." The Joker grinned, turning to the last man. "I'm most disappointed in you. You see that girl? Go ahead, look. I said look!"

Joker took the man by the hair and put his face towards Harley. The man was quivering with fear, surrounded by his dead friends. She waved at him happily.

"Are you scared?" He looked into the man's eyes. "You should be scared. Ya see, that girl means a lot to me. In case you didn't get the memo, she's the Joker's Queen of Hearts and I don't take kindly to Ace's who touch my property."

With that, he rose to full height and pointed towards the man's head.

"Ride's over."

Throughout the night a dozen shots sang through Gotham City. Batman, who had been taking the Riddler in, recognized the laughter joining them. But he didn't quite know whose the second, much higher, much feminine hysterics were. Turning to the Boy Wonder, Batman stated:

"Here that, Robin? Seems the Joker found a Misses."