Sorry this took so long to get up! Apparently my muse disappeared for a few weeks. Hopefully you'll all enjoy this last little snippet of Renesmee behaving badly :)

A/N- Not mine.


My niece has a wicked sense of humor.

We are not sure where it came from- it seemed to have emerged in her from birth, when she immediately took to biting the dog. It certainly was not inherited from her parents.

Edward took to blaming Emmett and me, claiming we were encouraging her "bad behavior."

We called it "nurturing her gift."

So today, Friday, February thirteenth, as Ness and I trail sluggishly behind Emmett as he investigates every inch of the mall, determined to find the perfect last-minute Valentine's gift for Rosalie, I wonder if she is thinking of giving my brother what is coming to him as well.

We had been dragged here on Emmett's insistence. We were the only ones home with Ness and he had found us as we sat reading in the living room. He'd begged us to go with him, apparently only then realizing that Valentine's day was in less than twenty-four hours and his wife would be rather unforgiving if he gave her nothing.

When I'd suggested he go alone, my brother's jaw fell open.

"No way. Go out alone on Friday the thirteenth? Are you crazy?"

When I'd reminded him that Friday the thirteenth was simply a superstition and a myth, he'd reminded that we were, too.

Right. Vampires. Crap.

And now, for the fourth consecutive hour, my niece and I are stuck trailing a superstitious vampire who threatens to rip my motorcycle to bits each time I suggest that maybe he should buy the next thing he picked up and let us go home. Terrific.

Our two-and-a-half-year-old niece groans as Emmett drags us into Macy's for the third time that day, leading us straight to the lingerie. I cringe as the lust and confusion wafting off of the desperate men in the department hits me.

Nessie squeezes my hand, showing me an image of myself two seconds earlier, followed by two questions, Uncle Jazz, are you ok? and Why?

"I'm fine," I tell her quietly, "As for the why, that's a question which is better saved for your parents."

She nods once and squeezes once more, this time asking when we could go home. She yawns, three images slipping past her control.

Our house. Her bed. Bella.

The slip is involuntary, a byproduct of her exhaustion, and I can feel her embarrassment.

"I don't know, darlin'. You should ask your Uncle Emmett."

"Uncle Em?" The little girl calls, and Emmett glances over his shoulder at her, a bustier dangling precariously in his hands.

"Yeah, pipsqueak?"

"Can we go home soon? I'm tired."

He grins at her,

"As soon as I find a present for Aunt Rose."

Her mood shifts to frustration and she buries her face into my side. When I attempt to free myself so I can wrap my arm around her shoulders, she clings to my hand as tightly as she can manage.

Uncle Jazz, she thinks. A series of images pass through her mind, the last of which include herself, lying comfortably in her bed as she reads a book with her mother.

A plan… and a good plan at that. It seemed to have formed as quickly in her mind as she could show it to me.

The kid is a prodigy.

No sooner has she let go of my hand than the tears, real and fat, begin to roll down her cheeks.

"Ness," I fake surprise, "What's wrong?"

Emmett turns around now, eyes wide as fear rolls off of him; Ness is not a crier- whether it is because she is tougher than most children or because no one in our family will allow it, I do not know. He kneels at her side and places his arms around her, his gentleness with our niece now second-nature.

"I'm tired. I wanna go home."

He laughs,

"Oh, is that all? I just need to finish shopping… one more hour, tops."

Ness glances at me for the briefest of seconds. My turn.

It kills me to do it, but I slowly begin sending her waves of sadness, frustration, and anger. The emotions are not overwhelming- just enough to push her over the edge, and not nearly enough for Emmett to suspect my influence.

Crocodile tears replace the comparatively smaller ones and Ness' lower lip quivers.

"B-b-but…" she starts, tripping over her now-enhanced emotion, "I wanna go home now!"

Her foot stomps in tandem with the last word she speaks, and she begins to sob loudly, her fit drawing stares from passersby. I realize what they're seeing- a beautiful little girl begging to go home in the company of two adolescent men, neither old enough to be her father. It probably is the cause of all the concern that suddenly nudges me.

Emmett stares at her, wide-eyed, before shooting me a meaningful glance.

"I'm trying, man," I lie, "I can't calm her down. She's too wound up."

"I… want… my… MOMMA!" Ness sniffles, collapsing to the floor in a sobbing heap. Her entire body shakes with the force of her cries, and her face is tear-stained.

The visual would have killed me if I hadn't already seen it in her head.

"Ness," Emmett pleads, desperate, nervous, and dumbfounded at once now, "C'mon, midget, you're a big girl. Show me how you're a big girl!"

"She's two-and-a-half," I remind him, too quick for human ears, "Two-and-a-half-year-olds can't be dragged around endlessly without rest."

He groans, leaning over to rub her back. She shifts her body away from his touch and I lean down to pull her into my arms.

"Good going, sweetheart," I whisper into her ear, and, despite her enhanced mood, I feel a rush of happiness escape her. I have to hide my grin when she presses a kiss to my shoulder.

"Ok, ok," Emmett groans, "I'll just get this," he holds up the bustier he'd been contemplating earlier, "and the rest I can just order online and have rush-delivered. Alright?"

Ness sniffles, but her tears begin to slow. I send her a shot of calm and her entire body responds, relaxing into my shoulder as she mouths the word "alright" in response.

As Emmett walks away, I hug the child more tightly to my body,

"You did wonderfully, Nessie."

She grins, a left-over sob escaping her,

"Think you could come next time Aunt Alice takes me to the mall? I can never get her to leave."

I smile back at her,

"We'll see, Ness. We'll see."

So that's it. Thank you all for reading and reviewing. Be on the lookout, I may or may not do an outtake with Rose, Alice, and Ness in which a temper tantrum is closely avoided. I also have a million other story ideas mulling around my head right now. Hope to see you all there!

Once again, reviews, please and thank you?