Itachi sat in his classroom, paying more attention to Sakura Haruno than his science teacher. The bell rang and Itachi walked up to Sakura, putting a hand on her desk, smirking. "Hey babe- got plans tonight?"
"Yeah- but none of them involve you." Sakura said, packing up her things. "Face it, Itachi-San, I don't like you, and you don't stand a chance against my Orochimaru."
"What the hell does that geezer have on me?!" Itachi demanded angrilly.
"Well, for one, he's certainly got more manners than you." She said frostily. "Got to go- I don't like to make my man wait." She smirked, walking off, making Itachi pound his fist down on her desk angrily. Damn 50-year-old Micheal Jackson imposter! Now, he'd never have a chance in hell with Sakura. Itachi sighed and walked out of the school- even catching a glimpse of Sakura and Orochimaru making out, before getting in his car and zooming off.
Hope you get in an accident. Itachi thought bitterly, before walking home.
&% Uchiha Residence %&
Right when Itachi walked through the door, his mother was shouting. "Damn it, Sasuke, stop playing 'Doctor' with Naruto!"
"Yes mom." Came Sasuke's reluctant reply, as Itachi dropped his back and took off his shoes, walking over to the counter and sitting on one of the bar stools there, laying his forehead on the cool and refreshing surface of the counter.
"Welcome home, Bachelor." His mother said sarcastic and teasingly- as always. "What's today's count?"
"4 love letters, 3 packages of home-made chocolates- and 0 chance of winning Sakura-Chan's heart." His mother scoffed.
"You know, I knew Orochimaru in high school." Itachi instantly perked up and lifted his head. He loved her stories. "He wasn't- quite- the playboy. Oh, but was he CUTE! He was quite and absorbed with his word, hardly letting a few people in. But when he did have to let someone in, he always chose me- I guess because he took a liking to me or something. I dunno, he got creepy."
"Why did he like you?"
"Well- I liked the same weirdo shit he did, and I was like his- how do you kids say it these days? 'Cuddle Buddy'?"
"You slept with him?!"
"Once or twice- But I always bullied him into using a condom- besides, even if I did have a kid, none of you came from him! (Thank the Lord)" His adoptive mother said. After the Uchiha clan died, She adopted Itachi and Sasuke- oh, and Naruto. Itachi and Sasuke were a package. she adopted Naruto because he was cute and a sweetheart. "But You have to watch out for Orochi- that motherfucker is lick a resturant kitchen door! He swings BOTH ways." Itachi laughed at this. "Anyways- he wasn't really the BEST experience I've had in bed, so to say. But that freakishly long tongue of his came in handy-"
"Got anything I can black-mail him with, mom?"
"Hell yes I do! You know what? We should have a conference with him! Don't worry- I got ways to keep him in line." She gave a shifty glance from left to right, and checked for his brothers, before gesturing him in for a secret bit of info, leaning forward as well. "I was so tight with him, that he actually taught me some of his special jutsu- and he made some for me too. I'll use them to keep him in line." She suggested. Itachi smirked.
"You're the best."
"That's what he said back then." she said, making him laugh once more. "Now go on and get that homework done! Or no black-mailing for you!"
&% Classroom- Parent Meeting %&
"You look sexy mom." Itachi said, making her giggle.
"You think so?"
They both entered the classroom. "Hello, , I'm Itachi's Foster Parent, Mako Takinara." She smiled, shaking hands with Itachi's Science teacher, Itachi looked at the sliding door, as Orochimaru came in.
"Mako-San!" He purred. "What a surprise!" Mako turned to Orochimaru, flipping her hair sexyily.
"Ohoho! Same here!" She said.
"Wow- You've gotten even prettier then the last time we met." Orochimaru said- this was in the tone of insulting her.
"And you've gotten more feminine! You might as well have a sexchange. "Mako said, smiling, even though every word dripped with acid.
"Oh- I see you have kids-"
"yes- but I signed the papers for their pedgrees- unlike you and your possible hundreds of illegitamite children out there in the world." Mako said. "But I'm here to bring to attention a- complaint- my son has with your relationship with a student here- underage of consentual sex." She smiled darkly. "Poor Orochimaru- I thought you might be smart enough to study up on your victim-"
"Yeah, well, I thought you'd show some freaking compassion-"
"HA! Compassion? to your bitch ass? You must have me mistaken for some other push over wench of yours!" Mako sneered, Itachi enjoying this bout.
"At least I'm a Sannin-"
"Hey, Don't you have a bombshell of a wife? And your dating a high schooler? Shows what you get for smoking all that crack and snorting all that meth." Mako hissed, "Oh, and by the way- I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE."
"You don't know my room-"
"I got that map you drew for me in high school- remember? you have too much shit to move in less than 2 days." The color drained from his face. "Bitches HAVE been trippin, eh? You'd better shape the fuck up- or I might- accidentally- tell them all I know-" She giggled devilishly. "Have a good day knowing my word is your downfall, Orochimaru-Chan!"
"You dirty whore!" Orochimaru snarled. "I'll get you for this!"
"And so leads to the reason of your wife whooping your ass." Mako said, as she and Itachi walked off. Orochimaru swore, he'd get back at them- especially that smug little punk, Itachi.
&% Uchiha Residence %&
"You were great, mom!" Itachi cheered. "You gave him the freaking smack down!"
"I guess so." She said. Something's wrong...I just feel it... "Go to bed, Itachi. Its late- you got school." Itachi growled, but did as he was told. Mako watched him as he trudged off- hoping she did the right thing, standing up for her adopted son- to Orochimaru. She got back to reading what she was reading.
&% Sound Village %&
"I'm sorry about Itachi-Kun bothering you, Orochi-Kun." Sakura said, sitting on his work bench, making him smirk.
"Your classmate didn't bother me- my old girlfriend did." He said, as he worked, holding a vial of green liquid to a candle to examine it.
"This- is my pay back." Orochimaru purred, kissing Sakura, giddy as a school girl, showing off the vial to her. "This is going to damage Mako-San so bady, she'll do ANYTHING to reverse its effect." He told her. Sakura didn't understand and was still a bit confused, but nodded, as he corked the vial and put it in a holder. He moved over to Sakura, putting his hands on either side of her, on the table. "Could you do me a favor?"
"Anything!" She responded without hesitation.
"Get Itachi to drink that- put it in a gatorade or something, I don't care. Just get him to drink it."
"But won't he be able to tell?" Sakura asked curiously, as Orochimaru rubbed the tip of his nose with hers.
"Of course not, silly girl! It will take on the look and form of the liquid in there."
"I don't get it."
"Lets say you finish of drinking a bottle of water. You pour this stuff in, and it will change to looking like and tasting like, water. It'll be ONLY for Itachi- it won't hurt you, but it will cause some serious problems for him." Orochimaru explained. "Just- make sure he gets it, understand." She nodded, making him smirk, before he kissed her. "After this, he'll never bother us again." Orochimaru said, pulling her closer, and kissing her longer. When the broke apart from the lip-lock for air, she giggled cutely.