Seriously don't ask me why I thought of this because I don't know. It sounded really funny in my head and I hope it does on paper.

Disclaimer: I own nothing.


"I need at least an hour before we do that again. My heart feels like its going to explode." she confessed.

Booth just laughed and kissed her back.

"Happy?" she asked as he closed his eyes and smiled wide.

"You're damn right I'm happy baby!"


That night had been phenomenal, even the next day was spent in bed trying to catch up for lost time.

Booth smiled happily thinking back on that day three months ago. He was proud of himself for finally growing some balls and confronting Bones. Their relationship had taken some getting use to at first, much to their surprise.

You would think after working so closely together for four years you would know everything about a not true!

He already knew she was a bit OCD, but the littlest things would piss her off. Half drunk bottle of water in the fridge was a no no. She would say if you wanted to drink it, drink it all and don't leave it in the fridge and forget about it. The next thing would be her books...He knew she had a plethora of books but he never noticed that they were all in alphabetical order, and god forbid if he looked at one and put it back in the wrong place. It would be like medusa with stone cold eyes and snakes for hair.

Her semi neat freak ways and hasty attitude would lead to some pretty heated arguments and lots of fun make up sex. Even though afterwards she claimed to be duped by his charming smile and other arousing features.

The three months hadn't been all that bad, and to commemorate the monumental occasion Booth had plans to take Bones out to dinner, imagine his surprise when she couldn't go.

"What do you mean you can't go? It's our three moth anniversary for Christ sakes!"

"I know that Booth don't yell at me. I can't help that Cam got sick and these reports and other documents have to be taken care of tonight so the board can review them at their meeting in the morning. Peoples jobs depend on this Booth, if it looks like an area of research and study isn't producing like it should the board will move to have it shut down, and I'm sorry but our anniversary can wait till tomorrow...this can't." she shot back.

Booth hated when she tried to lecture him like one of her med students but he accepted the fact that her work was more important and for the sake of the lab and the people who worked there he conceded and told her they could do something tomorrow.

"Can I at least bring you some dinner and we can eat together?"

"I'm sorry but Angela already ordered pizza...she's staying to help me go through the reports so I can get done faster."

Booth let out a defeated sigh. "Ok...I guess I will just see you tomorrow."

Brennan felt bad when she saw the look on Booth's face. He look like a sad puppy that you just wanted to love and comfort, but she needed him away so he wouldn't distract her.

"Hey I have an idea. Hodgins just restored a 1965 corvette convertible. Maybe you two could go out for some beers and talk auto shop?"

"Its talk shop Bones, and I don't know."

"Oh come on I think you would have fun. He was going out anyway, one of our friends that used to work here as the museum curator is in town, and they are having a boys night. I just don't want you to be sad tonight because I'm not with you, please go out and have some fun." she pleaded giving him her starry eyes that he could never say no to.

"Fine I will go...but only because I want to see that car."

"Great ill tell Hodgins."


That night Booth met Hodgins and another man that was about five eleven and a buck forty (140lb) at Wong Foo's for some dinner and a few drinks.

Booth still felt bad that Bones was at work and he just missed her company. While he was slightly sulking he didn't notice that he already drank four double scotch drinks and was sipping on a beer. He couldn't even remember what Hodgins and this other guy...Luke...yeah that was his name, were talking about.

At some point Luke came over to talk to Booth and sat very very close to him. Any closer and he would be in Booth's lap.

"So your Tempe's new boy toy! Jack tells me that you wrangled her into an actual relationship."

Booth was slightly uncomfortable with Luke's proximity and tried to lean away a little. Luke saw this and swung his arm around Booth's shoulder and squeezed it hard.

"That's good man. She needs someone good in her life, and you look like you can treat her real good." He said with a wink.

'What? Is this Dude flirting with me? Na I think I'm just drunk.'


Bright rays of sunlight filtered through the bedroom window and hit Booth directly in the face. When he woke up he looked around to see that he was in his apartment and in his bed...but he was naked.

'Why am I naked and why is there a used condom on the floor? And dear god how much did I drink last night?'

He heard some noise coming from his bathroom and the sound of running water being shut off.

'Bones must have come in late last night and had her way with me. Not that I mind but I'd like to at least remember when I've had sex.' he thought.

The thought of Bones having her way with him made his morning wood into a more prominent erection.

'Well she did say we would do something together today...Having good morning sex sound like a good start to me.'

He laid himself out on the bed posing himself with his disheveled hair and sexy as hell body, waiting for Brennan to walk out of the bathroom and see her stud of a man hard and ready to go for her.

When the bathroom door opened Booth nearly had a heart attack.


"Morning big that for me?"

A very naked Luke walked out of the bathroom and blushed at Booth's arousal. Booth quickly covered himself and nearly fell off the other side of the bed.

"Now don't be shy baby. It's not like I haven't seen it already...or tasted it."

Booths eyes grew wide.

"No way...there is no fucking way I came home with a dude last night."

"But you did baby and the things you did....wwhew make me want to shiver. You filled me like no other man has big boy, and you seemed to enjoy it yourself."

"No...HELL NO! I am not gay. I am a straight heterosexual male... I like woman and breast and pussy. I like the clit not the dick so I'm sorry I don't know what you think happened last night but I did not fuck you."

"You don't have to tell me baby I know what happened, I wasn't the one that was drunk begging to fuck me in the ass."


"Don't get testy with me baby. I enjoyed it. And you enjoyed it when I returned the favor."

Booths eyes were huge.

"I did not get fucked in the ass."

"The condom hanging out your butt says otherwise sugar. Now if you'll excuse me I have a plane to catch."

Luke picked up his belongs and exited Booth's apartment.

Booth stood there breathing heavily trying to calm himself. No way did he fuck or get fucked by a man last night. He saw something on his bedside table and picked it up. It was pictures of him and Luke at Wong Foo's. Luke was all over him and he was more than three sheets to the wind.

"Oh my god."

He then remembered what Luke said and reached around and pulled out the used condom that was sticking out of his ass.

"OH MY GOD." he was freaking out royally, staring at the incriminating evidence. He felt the bile in his stomach rising up and looking for an exit. He felt violated, humiliated and dirty as he stared at the condom.

Suddenly there was a flash of light and a rather amused looking Bones standing in the doorway.

"Seeley Booth discovering a used condom sticking out off his ass." she said throwing the picture down onto the floor.

Booth looked at her and looked like he was about to shout out a full explanation till she raised the camera and took another Polaroid.

"Seeley Booth freaked out that his girlfriend just caught him cheating with another man."

She laughed as she threw that picture down. She then turned the camera and took a smiling picture of herself before throwing it down.

"Temperance Brennan, basking in her glory of paying back her boyfriend for taking advantage of her in her office three months ago!"

Booth looked ridiculously lost trying to put the pieces together of what she was saying. Once it seemed like the light bulb came on in his head she snapped another picture.

"Seeley Booth realizing that all of this was just a rouse set up by his loving girlfriend...priceless. I think I will keep this picture." she said with a smile.

Booth's jaw dropped.

"That's right baby I told you I'd pay you back and this was...ahh. This was just awesome.

"So Luke?"

"Oh Luke is gay. He is also not shy and is a great team player. When Angela and I came up with the idea he was more than happy to play along. All we had to do is get you drunk enough which you did perfectly and the rest played itself out nicely."

Booth didn't know if he should be furious or proud that Brennan would even consider doing a stunt like this.

"In the words of Ashton Kutcher...You got punk'd!"

Booth fumed and took off toward Brennan, dropping his sheet and chasing her around the apartment naked. Brennan just laughed and snapped as many pictures as she could trying to stay away from Booth.

When they ran into the living room Booth chased her around the couch a few times before tackling her to the ground. Brennan squealed and laughed as they landed. Booth wrenched the camera away from her and threw it against the wall.

"HEY!! That was and expensive camera." she chide.

"Shut up." Booth hissed before capturing her lips with his.

Brennan's protest died when she felt his lips on hers. He attacked them furiously, growling and grunting as he removed her pants and panties.

She knew that he was pissed and knew that he was about to prove that he was very much a straight heterosexual man that loved woman.

"Are you mad baby?" she teased using his words from that night against him.

"Because you are so fucking hot when you're angry."

Booth roared as he sank his cock deep inside her.

Temperance cried out with pleasure as he did this. She released a growl of her own when he started biting at her neck and pummeling her cunt.

"I told you I'd get you back when you....ahhh....least expected it." she moaned as he pounded into her.

"That was a fucked up way to get back at me Bones." he growled pounding deep inside her a few more times letting the sound of her cries echo in his ears.

"But it so worth it baby...oh god fuck me." she gasp.

Booth pulled her further beneath him burying himself to the hilt.

Normally he wouldn't have ever considered fucking Brennan like this, but she played a dirty trick and he was going to have his way.

He pounded roughly a few more times then stopped.

"Wha- Why'd you stop?" she questioned as he pulled out of her throbbing cunt.

He didn't say a word. He just flipped her over and brought her to her knees.

"I'm making it clear to you that this is the only asshole that my dick will ever be in." he growled.

Brennan felt like she had the wind knocked out of her when Booth slowly pushed his way in her tight hole. She had anal sex before but this was the first time with Booth and it never felt like this.

He thrusted deep inside her anus, loosening those tight muscles that tried to push his cock out. Brennan cried out every time he pushed inside her, he almost thought he was hurting her till she cried out for more and faster. Booth gave it to her as hard and as fast as he could go and soon he was falling over the edge when she clasped down on him tighter than anything he's ever felt before in his life. Brennan felt the rush of his release shoot inside her, and although it was a different feeling from the usual coming inside her cunt, she had no arguments.

"Your really not mad are you?" she asked when their breathing regulated.

"No I'm not mad…I'm very…very relieved that was just a prank." He panted

Brennan laughed and rolled over on top of Booth, laying her head on his chest listening to his heart beat.

"Happy anniversary Booth."

Booth just smiled and kissed her forehead; he looked forward to many more anniversaries like this minus the naked man and supposed same gender sex. He wanted to keep the fire they both possessed alive and resting there on the floor with the woman he loved in his arms he learned that their fire together was an eternal flame never to be extinguished.

I laughed my ass off when I re-read this. My friends that are gay said that was a funny yet fucked up way to mess with somebody but they loved it, and I hope yawl did as well. I hope I didn't offend anyone in writing this chapter it was not my intention, I was just going for a few laughs.