Title: What too much vodka can do
Rating: T
Genre: Humor/Romance
Disclaimer: I do not own Macross Frontier.
Summary: The big day has finally arrived for Alto to wed his superior's sister and wife-to-be. But just before he can say, "I do," a premarital fling from his not-so-distant past crashes the wedding.

A/N: The formal first chapter has yet to begin. Enjoy this prologue (that's kinda recycled).


Michel Blanc had learned long ago that there was never a dull moment when it involved Saotome Alto, his best friend and comrade.
He had known Alto since high school, and together with his other best friend Luca Angelloni—loli-shouta extraordinaire and heir to the L.A.I Corporation, they never found a boring moment in their times together.

Not even today. On Alto's wedding day…

"Senpai, hold still," Luca admonished as he tried to fix Alto's tie. Luca, being short, as his loli-shouta state demanded him to be, was already on his toes as he tried to do the task. Alto had to bend his trunk forward for Luca. He did not like it one bit, as the positioning of their bodies made it look like something a yaoi fangirl would like to see.

"This is stupid…" Alto grumbled under his breath. Michel's pointy ear perked up on that. He smiled a devilish grin.

"Hoho, having second thoughts, hime?"

"You're wrong!"

"Senpai, hold still!"

"I'll take care of this, Luca," Michel took the reins from Luca and secured the tie expertly while the bridegroom muttered a grumpy "thanks".

Luca watched with a smile as he sat on the daybed. "I still can't believe Senpai is getting married."

Michel snorted. "I know there's a saying 'stranger things can happen,' but I can't think of anything that can surpass this."

Alto reacted with a scowl, "Michel, you"—

"Now, now, hime. Don't make me tighten this tie of yours accidentally." He was smiling but the evil intention could be felt around him.

Alto could only glare at his spectacled friend, not wanting to risk his neck--literally-- if he did anything else.

"There we go, all done." Michel stepped back and reviewed his work with approval.

"Senpai," Luca chuckled, "you look so weird in a tux."

"I'll say," Michel nodded in agreement, "he should be the one in the wedding dress instead."

Alto's brows were ticking dangerously.

"Luca…Michel, I am so close to cheerfully murdering you two."

With his hands clenched into fists on his side, he looked more like an angry princess than a supposedly eager groom.

Michel sighed dramatically. "Poor Ranka-chan. Having to marry such a brute. I will pray for her soul everyday."

"Alto-senpai must be so happy," Luca chimed in, "she's a nice girl and all."

Alto's homicidal face shifted dramatically. He turned away from both of them, unable to look them in the eye.


"Senpai, is something wrong?"


"Don't tell me you're getting cold feet." Luca cried out in alarm.

"I'm not!"

Michel's face became solemn as he turned to Luca and said, "Luca, could you excuse us a bit." It was not a request. The curt tone in his voice indicated that. Luca immediately obeyed without question and hastily got off the daybed.

"Yes, of course!"

He crossed the room to the door and exited silently.

It was quiet.

When Michel was sure that Luca no longer had his ear pressed to the door, he cleared his throat. Walking over to the windows, he asked. "Alto, are you seriously having second thoughts?"

Alto's reply was hesitantly done.

"…I don't know."

Michel took a deep breath, as if to steady himself for what was coming next. Both he and Alto were facing each other's backs, their words the only things that would meet.

"Alto, you could always"—

"I can't go back on my word." Alto snapped.

"Damn, you're stubborn." Michel chuckled before becoming deadly serious again.

"Alto, remember...these kinds of things aren't to be taken lightly. Put Ranka's feelings into consideration. It's going to be hard to watch that poor girl suffer from your indecisiveness—be it on your backtracking decision or the long run."


"Think about it."

"I promised I'd protect her." The words Alto had uttered sounded determined but Michel knew better.

"There should be something else to say, don't you think?"

Alto could not answer.

The whole time Ranka looked at him with such a gentle and loving smile, Alto was suffering more and more every second...
He couldn't make sense of what the priest was droning on about when he should—as they had rehearsed many times on this.

His earlier conversation with Michel kept ringing in his head. Cold sweat started to bead on his face and nape. The guilt he had tried to bottle in was bubbling inside and was ready to pop the cork.

Ranka was clearly listening to whatever the priest was saying, because whatever he said, it made Ranka smile even more lovingly at him.
It took Alto a full minute to finally realize that they were already at the heart of the vows—and Ranka had just finished saying "I do".

Alto stiffened as the priest began to ask him the questions he had asked Ranka.

"—To love and to honor, till death do you part?"

It was Alto's turn to answer.

Everyone waited for him.

Alto opened his mouth.

Everyone sat on the edge of their seats.

Alto was hesitating.

Ranka's smile faltered.

The priest was getting impatient.

Michel was softly praying for Alto.

Klan was clutching Michel's hand tightly.

Luca was trembling.

Nanase, the bridesmaid, was wringing the bouquet she was holding for Ranka.

Ozma was silently reaching for his gun.

Cathy was trying to restrain him.

Finally after what seemed like an eternity…

Alto reached out for Ranka's gloved hand and clasped it firmly.


The sound of the chapel doors being barged open returned everything to a standstill.

All eyes turned around.

Standing there on the entryway was a beautiful tempestuous woman, who looked like she was capable of sending anyone to hell if need be.
It also seemed like she was targeting Alto for the trip to said hell with her daggering glare at him.

Alto looked like he saw a ghost.

"Saotome Alto!"

She began marching down the aisle.

"You can't marry that girl!"

Everyone broke into mindless clamor.

"On what grounds…?" asked the priest, who seemed to be the only one with a clear head around.

The beautiful woman stopped a few feet from the altar and pale couple. She regarded the priest with a smile before turning to Alto.

"On the grounds that I'm carrying the groom's child," was her answer.




From his spot, Michel could only blink in astonishment.

Truly, there was never a dull moment when it involved Saotome Alto.