I do not own Katekyo Hitman Reborn.
Characters: Hibari, Gokudera
Pairings: 1859, HibaGoku
A/N: Because this pairing needs more love. This was originally a fic to test which pairing I liked writing more, but upon finishing I decided to devote my Reborn fangirl-ism to 1859.
He opens the door, dumps Hayato onto his creaky pull-out sofa, and makes to leave.
The steady hand on his shoulder stops him. Green eyes stare, and with that gaze, Kyoya is weighed down.
He sighs, and he stays.
One night. That was all.
Hibari Kyoya had gone there and stayed there for one night.
One, short, measly, night, ten hours of virtually no importance.
There was nothing more.
Yet the next day, when he tells Hayato to get lost with the rest of the herbivores, Kyoya receives a shaky glare from those green eyes, brimming with betrayal.
He does not see the reason. It had only been one night. He had left the place as soon as he got up.
The question leaves Kyoya's mouth quickly, but Hayato turns away quicker.
He does not wish to leave, but he cannot bear to hear Kyoya talk. He does not wish to explain, but he cannot bear Kyoya's ignorance.
Hayato walks away without a word.
Kyoya does not understand Hayato's actions, but he feels the shackles being clamped on his wrists at that moment.
He hears the footsteps slow, and knows that Hayato is waiting for a reaction.
Kyoya does not give Hayato the pleasure of one, but he goes back to Hayato's flat that evening.
He felt the chains tightening, becoming taut.
Two nights. That was all.
He had been with Hayato for two nights, yet the next day, when Hibari turns his back on the Guardians and walks away, he could feel those green eyes burning through his back, silently screaming betrayal into his ears.
So what if Kyoya went to Hayato's small, cramped and decidedly dirty flat? It was two nights. Only two nights. Hayato is the same as anyone else, he is not special, he and Kyoya have no connection.
There is no reason for Hayato to feel like he has been betrayed. There was nothing in the first place.
He should not be expecting anything.
Kyoya wants to go to Hayato and tell the fucker to stop being so fucking delusional, and for the sake of god stop looking at him with that face! There is no reason for you to be wearing that face, there was nothing in the first place! Nothing, fucking idiot, so stop looking at me with that fucking face!
Because just that look on Hayato's face deepens Kyoya's commitments, deepens his ties to the world.
His shackles tighten, he cannot get himself out of the chains and he curses Hayato for chaining him down, tying his wings to his sides and rendering them useless.
Kyoya goes back that evening.
Stockholm syndrome, is that it?
Developing a troublesome and downright infuriating liking for the very man who captured him, who bound him to the earth.
The irony comes back and bites him in the neck.
He hates it, but he loves Hayato, damnit, his freedom just matters more.
Matters more than Hayato?
So it does, does it?
He feels the metal contracting around his wrists.
That morning, he buttons up his wrinkled violet shirt, looks for his tie, and finds it in the hands of Hayato, the black material bulging through the gaps between his clutched pianist fingers. Green eyes stare shakily at Kyoya's face, waiting for a reaction.
Kyoya folds his coat over his arm, slides into his leather shoes. He pretends not to see, and leaves.
The tie remains in Hayato's slender hands.
Reassurance, is that what Hayato wants? Reassurance that Kyoya would be back that evening, that Kyoya would not turn him down, that Kyoya would not give him the merciless, harsh monotone he gave everyone else.
Kyoya does not want to give Hayato that reassurance, because it means that he would be accepting his ties. He would be accepting his cage, the chains that held him to the ground. If he goes to Hayato to retrieve the black silk from those trembling fingers, and reassures Hayato that he would be coming back regardless, Kyoya would be sealing his own freedom away, leaving him burdened, unable to fly like he longs to. So let him take it.
Just let him take it, and not say anything about it, because Kyoya has not frozen his heart up enough to turn Hayato down. He is still not heartless enough to bear that look of betrayal.
Kyoya is letting himself being captured, and he realises it.
Even though he knows, he goes back.
"You cannot bring a bird to the ground unless you shoot it to death." So said Kyoya one night, a bitter smile gracing his features.
There was a pause before the other replied with a level voice. "And yet, a bird is nothing if it has no place to land."
It was becoming a habit.
Sometimes Hayato took it on purpose; sometimes Kyoya left it on purpose. Neither say anything, but both know that Kyoya would never admit to being captured.
Hayato takes Kyoya's tie to reassure. He is afraid Kyoya will leave, and not come back. So he takes, and waits at the door for the moment Kyoya comes back to reclaim his possessions.
Kyoya wants to comfort Hayato, but he wants, needs, his freedom more. He does not admit anything, yet he goes back every day and his restraints grow deeper.
He does not want to admit, so he just lets Hayato take his tie. Every evening, he comes back wearing another, and that one too, will be in Hayato's hands by the next morning.
Both are waiting for the moment Hayato can get over his need to reassure, and not take Kyoya's tie.
Both are waiting for the moment Kyoya can get over his need for freedom, and ask for his tie back from Hayato.
Gokudera Hayato has captured Hibari Kyoya.
They both know, but they do not voice it. They are simply waiting for the time when Kyoya can come to terms with it.
For the time being, that is enough.