Reverse Nekoken

By King Loki

Disclaimer: Still don't own Ranma.

Authors notes: This took some time coming. Thank you to everyone who has both read and reviewed. You honour me. Now I'm going to address a few points people have brought up.

On the Nekoken: In this story I put it that Ranma doesn't have full control over the Nekoken and must see a cat be hurt before he could tap into it because I didn't want Ranma to have a big advantage of being able to utilise the Nekoken whenever he wants. Some fics deal with Ranma getting full control of the Nekoken. I wanted to give Ranma a different Nekoken that comes without the fear of cats but still has some stipulations. The Nekoken technique itself won't be very predominant as such as the effects a cat loving Ranma has on the original story.

On Catgirls: I would like to say that the thought already crossed my mind before writing this fic. There are two reasons why Ranma didn't get fur and a tail while he was at Jusenkyo. 1) It was too obvious. Catgirl/boy Ranma has already been done before in Ranma fanfiction. 2) I didn't want to go down the road of making Ranma into a cat. Other authors have already done that. I wanted to make a fic were we see Ranma's love for the furry little creatures.

On Shampoo: Some of you have already looked to the future. Let me only say one thing. Nothing is straight forward in the Ranma universe.

WARNING! WARNING! This Chapter contains gratuitous amounts of innuendos. You have been warned. Proceed with caution.

Chapter 4

Morning graced the Tendo dojo as its inhabitants started to rise. Kasumi headed to the kitchen to begin breakfast, Soun collected the morning paper and began to read from his place at the dining table, Nabiki took her morning bath and Akane went on her morning jog.

Yes, just another peaceful morning at the Tendos.


The call went out as the two in the yard charged at each other. The younger one quickly took control of the fight, using his speed and agility. Ranma bounced on the soles of his feet before releasing four strong kicks in quick succession. Genma blocked the first two, dodged the third and grabbed the fourth to pull Ranma off balance. The pigtailed boy let his father pull him before jumping and kicking the man's forearm with his free leg. Genma automatically released Ranma's leg and took a step back, holding his arms up in a loose guard. Ranma also took a step back, taking a breath to revitalize himself before jumping back at his father with a spectacular flying spin kick. Genma jumped to meet his son mid air as the two martial artist displayed the formidable aerial techniques of the Saotome School of anything goes.

The father and son duo were still trading blows in the air when Akane returned from her run and began to watch the two.

Akane was quite impressed from the skill the two men were showing.

"They are really good!" she said out loud, without realising it.

"It's a bit early to be making all this racket!" Came a complaint behind her as Nabiki grumpily took her seat beside the table. Akane joined them as the two martial artists finished up by throwing each other into the Koi pond.

It was at this point that the third guest let himself be known with a small meow. Neko bounded into the room from the door way and made his way to the dining room table, taking a seat beside the female Ranma as she began to settle herself. The two Tendo sister watched in slight amazement as the black and white cat got on its haunches and brought its front legs up on to the table, showing a very good impersonation of a human waiting to be served. Soun looked up from his paper before deciding to ignore it. Genma, in panda form, merely snort like it was usual and Ranma-chan petted him affectionately.

Nabiki was about to raise the point of getting Neko into some form of cat show when Kasumi bustled in with the breakfast. She placed the food at the centre of the table and started to distribute it out to everyone sitting. As she began to sit, she heard a slight growl before looking up to find both Ranma and his cat glaring at her. She tried to see what she had done wrong before realizing that they expect her to serve Neko a plate as well. Kasumi paused at this before realising that she wouldn't be a good host if she didn't serve all her guests so took another, albeit smaller, plate and place some rice and fish on it before putting it in front of her furry guest.

"Sorry about that." Kasumi said, feeling slightly uncomfortable speaking to a cat.

Ranma and Neko both nodded satisfied, before digging in to the meal.

Genma took a hot kettle from the table and poured it over both himself and his son. Ranma hardly noticed the change as he dug into to his food.

The Tendo family looked on in wonder as there three guests devoured there meals at a speed they had all thought impossible. To see both Ranma and Genma shovelling the food away in seconds without much effort was quite extraordinary. To see the cat keep up with then made the Tendos jaws drop. The cat separated small portions of rice with his paw before bowing his head down and eating off the plate.

As the Saotomes went for their second helping the Tendos really got amazed, the two men and one cat began to partake in Saotome anything goes martial dinning. The father and son went at each other with chopsticks, blocking and striking as the cat defended his plate with his claws.

Nabiki began to feel her jaw start to hurt from the position it was being forced into so decided to start a conversation.

"That's an unusual looking cat you have there Saotome." Nabiki decided to go for one of Ranma's likes and from last night she was pretty sure cats were one.

"Yeah," Ranma said distractedly, still focused on the battle he was having with his father.

"I've never seen a cat with black and white stripes before. Where did you... meet him?" Nabiki said carefully, knowing the guest was rather delicate when it came to the animal's rights.

Ranma snorted a laugh.

"He's not your usual house cat. Neko-chan is a white Bengal tiger."

The whole family's eyes widened as they looked down at the large cat in front of them.

"A bit small isn't he!" Nabiki said, looking unimpressed by Ranma's claim.

"He's only a few years old. He'll get a lot bigger!" said Ranma, a beaming smile on his face.

Nabiki looked down at the cat in front of her, fear of the young tiger now tripling. Taking a more close look a the cat, showed to her that it did in fact look diffrent from the common house cat and it's claws were much larger. That was until she remembered how highly people paid to get a real life white tiger. Nabiki licked her lips as money signs started to appear in her eyes.

"Say Saotome-"

"Finished!" Ranma said as he used his chopsticks to unbalance and toss his much heavier father out into the backyard.

"You were saying something Nabiki?" Ranma turned to her.

Nabiki looked at how easily Ranma was able toss Genma, a very heavy built man, out of the way and decided not to test her luck.

"Never mind! Oh look at the time. I've got to get to school early today!" Nabiki rose from the table before grabbing her school bag and heading out the door.

"Huh? Nabiki wait!" Akane called after her sister but she was already too far away.

"That reminds me boy! You're going to school with Tendo's daughters." Genma said as he walked back into the room.

"School?" Ranma asked, collecting Neko up into his arms.

"Yes. We'll be staying here a long time so I don't want you arguing with-"

"Do they allow cats?" Ranma asked, a smile on his face. Genma paused as he saw danger signs come up if he didn't answer this question carefully.

"I'm sure they let cats in!" Genma said, smiling broadly.

"Actually they have a 'no pets' policy at Furingkan." Akane said informatively.

"Well I'm sure they can make an exception!"Genma told her quickly as he saw his son's mood started to take a nose dive.

Ranma seemed placated by his father's announcement and headed off to get ready for school.

Genma sighed before turning to face the youngest Tendo daughter.

"What did we talk about last night concerning the importance of cats to Ranma?" Genma growled at the girl.

Akane blushed embarrassedly and rubbed the back of her neck.

"Sorry, I forgot." Akane's mind went back to last night before she shivered. Certain parts of that night she'd dearly like to forget. Those cat like eyes staring at her most of all.

"Just don't rock the boat." Genma cautioned as he took his seat and started to finish his meal at a slower pace.

"By the way Akane, I'd like you to show Ranma to school today." Soun said, not looking up from his paper.

"What?!" Akane yelled in indignation before subsiding when her father gave her a stern look. Akane finally nodded after Soun had continued to stare at her.

"Good." Soun replied brightly before going back to his paper.

Akane stamped out the room and met Ranma and his cat as they were putting shoes on to go outside. (Ranma had shoes. Neko didn't wear shoes. That's silly!)

"Problem?" Ranma asked her cheerfully.

Akane glared at the boy before putting her own shoes on and marching out the door.

Akane walked down the street in a huff. The cause of her bad mood was walking on the street fence next to her.

It had surprised Akane when both Ranma and Neko had jumped onto the fence and started to walk along as if it was normal. The cat she could understand but the reason the pigtailed boy was doing it she could only guess was from the boy's habit doing things the 'cat' way.

They continued in silence for sometime before Akane could not hold her thoughts to herself anymore.

"When we get to school I don't know you." She shouted up at the pigtailed boy.

Ranma blinked before getting an annoyed look on his face. 'Whats her problem!'

"Fine with me!" He said unconcernedly.

"And we're not getting engaged!" Akane continued.

"Like I'd want to," Ranma growled back.

"What was that?" Akane looked up at Ranma, anger on her features.

"You heard me tomboy!" Ranma said to her.

Annoyance built up in Akane before she decided to release it physically. She turned and kicked the fence Ranma stood on.

Ranma merely jumped and caught Neko as he leapt to avoid Akane's attack as well. As both animal and human landed they turned and stuck there tongues out at the girl. Akane growled in anger.

Emotions might have escalated then if it wasn't for an old lady throwing a bucket of water over Ranma and Neko's heads. Ranma changed swiftly into a girl as the cat hissed before jumping from her hands.

Akane sighed as a new problem reared its head. Ranma couldn't go to school in his cursed form so they had to find hot water somewhere on the way. An idea hit Akane.

"Come on Ranma. I'll show you where to get some hot water." Akane said as she raced off.

Both Ranma and Neko watched Akane run off down the street before turning to each other, shrugging and racing off after her.

The three soon arrived at a local clinic. Akane stopped and wait for the redhead and her cat to catch up.

"This is the place." Akane said cheerfully to the two before heading in.

"Do you think she's a little emotionally unstable too?" Ranma asked Neko.


"It could run in the family. Her dad did seem to cry a lot!"

The two shook their heads before walking in after Akane.

As they stepped through the door they walked into a clean and tidy waiting room.

"What took so long?" Akane asked from the other side of the room. "I can't find Dr Tofu!"

Akane looked slightly worried about this 'Dr Tofu', Ranma thought.

Ranma stopped for a moment before getting down on all fours, closing her eyes and sniffing the air.

"What are you doing?" Akane asked at the girl's strange behaviour.

Ranma's eyes shot open and she quickly rose from the floor.

"He's in that room." Ranma pointed towards one of the side doors in the hall, the tone of her voiced sounded very confident.

"You're sure?" Akane asked sceptically.

Ranma nodded as she turned the handle and opened the door.

"Call it animal instincts!" she said, giving Akane a very cat like grin.

The girl shivered before heading in after her.

As they entered the room, the two teens looked around before hearing Neko make a noise and start to head towards a skeleton in the corner.

"What've you found Neko?" Ranma asked heading towards the medical apparatus.

The redhead jumped back in to a stance as the skeleton started to move, almost coming alive. Akane gasped, having a fear of scary movies meant she didn't like the supernatural very much.

"Sorry. I'm just messing around." A soft voice said as a young man came out from behind the skeleton. "I hope Betty didn't startle you?"

"Dr Tofu! We were looking for you." Akane said walking towards the young doctor.

Ranma blinked as both Akane's body language and voice became more shy and awkward. He shared a look with Neko as they both raised their eye brows in understanding.

"What can I do for you Akane?" The doctor asked, looking at the girl.

Akane blushed and looked towards the ground to hide her face.

"We need some hot water." She said demurely.

"We? Who is your friend, Akane?"

"This is..." Akane started.

"Ranma Saotome!" the red haired girl dashed forward and bowed to the doctor. "I'm a guest of the Tendos while I'm staying in town."

"Nice to meet you miss Ranma." Tofu bowed back.

"I wonder how long that title will last!" Ranma said quietly.

"Excuse me?"

"Oh never mind. This is Neko-chan." Ranma introduced the cat at her feet. It bowed it's head respectfully.

"What an intelligent cat you have there!" The doctor said, returning the bow. "I'll just get that hot water for you now."

As the doctor went to collect a kettle, Ranma stood beside Akane.

"So you've got the hots for that guy?" Ranma grinned at her.

"What?!" Akane exclaimed, getting even more red-faced.

"It's kind of obvious." Ranma went on obliviously.

"Shut up and mind your own business!" Akane ground out between clenched teeth.

"Here's your hot water Akane." Dr Tofu said, handing over the kettle as he walked back into the room.

Ranma took the kettle from Akane and poured it over herself. She changed to a he, much to the shock of Dr Tofu.

"Jusenkyo?" Dr Tofu asked quietly.

"You know about Jusenkyo?" asked the now male Ranma. Akane also looked surprised at Dr Tofu's knowledge.

"I have a slight interest in the supernatural." The doctor said with a small smile on his face. He turned his head and looked at the clock on the wall.

"You two better hurry or you'll be late for school!"

Ranma and Akane said there good byes to the local doctor and headed out the clinic.

"So you going to ask him out?" Ranma asked, walking with Neko on the fence again.

"Shut up!" Akane replied angrily.

"And here I thought she hated boys?" Ranma looked at Neko who shrugged.

"Yes. I hate boys!" Akane growled out before charging up the road.

Ranma and Neko both look on as Akane ran ahead. They looked at each other for a moment before shaking their heads and running after her.

Ranma looked around and whistled at the devastation surrounding him. The bodies of dozens of teenage school boys wearing different forms sports gear laid around him in varying stages of consciousness. Akane stood in the middle of the school yard brushing her hands and muttering under her breath.

"Every morning!" Akane complained quietly.

"You sure are popular, Akane!" Ranma said as he hopped down off the school gates, Neko in his arms. The black and white young tiger could only look around and nod weakly.

Suddenly a rose shot out from a bush towards Akane who caught it easily. A Young man in a blue Kendo uniform and holding a bokken came out from behind a tree and started to head towards them at a leisurely pace.

"Truly a boorish lot aye Akane Tendo?" the young man asked while striking a confident pose.

"More friends, Akane?" Ranma asked as he put his cat down and walked towards her.

"Stay out of this Ranma!" Akane growled.

"You!" the Kendōka yelled, levelling his wooden sword at Ranma. "Who are you to talk so informally with Akane Tendo?"

Ranma opened his mouth to answer but was quickly interrupted by the other boy.

"Ah but is it not usual for one to introduce themselves first!" The young man said dramatically. "Very well. I am Kuno Tatewaki, heir to the great Kuno family and rising star of the Kendo world, also known as the blue thunder!"

Kuno struck a dramatic pose, his sword pointing to the sky as lighting erupted around him. He waited for the awe and celebrations to begin in front of him but he was only met by silence. Turning his head down to his audience he only found Akane Tendo glaring at him with an annoyed look on her face and the strange newcomer kneeling and... holding a ball of string out for the cat that accompanied him to play with.

"Pay attention to me damn it!" Kuno yelled, losing his patience.

Ranma looked up.

"Oh you're done." Ranma stood up and got into a stance, a cocky grin on his face. "Well I'm Saotome Ranma and as far as I'm concerned you've been spouting fighting words since you got here so let's go!"

Kuno smirked at the pigtailed boy facing him.

"Very well. Prepare to feel the blows of a thousand sword strikes!" Kuno announced, bring his bokken up in a strong forward guard.

"Bring it!" Ranma said, getting into a standard tiger style stance, much to Akane's worry who started to back away from the two fighters.

The two combatants faced each other; silence reigned across the school, only to be disturbed by the murmur of students taking bets on the fight.

The two martial artists stood still, evaluating each other. Akane watched from the background, slightly nervous over what could result from this battle. The students in the yard and watching from the windows all stayed still, not willing to tear their eyes from the match about to start.

The tension was thick in the air and was only getting stronger until-

"Meow!" a sound came from behind Ranma as everyone else almost collapsed from the anti-climax.

Ranma turned and regarded his feline companion before looking up at the sky.

"Rain?" Ranma said before looking down at Neko. The two regarded each other before Ranma shrugged his shoulders and turned back to the still waiting Kuno.

"Sorry man but I don't fight in bad weather! We'll have to continue this some other time."

Before Kuno could argue against it, Ranma dove forward, catching him off guard. The pigtailed martial artist pounced on the other boy's head, driving the kendo captain's skull into the ground before hurrying inside, Neko at his heels.

"Outrageous!" Kuno yelled as he got back up. "Why I will teach that-"

Kuno's words were stopped as his eyes rolled up into his head and he collapsed. Akane Tendo stood behind him, brandishing the Kuno heir's bokken.

"Sorry Kuno but I just don't have the patience to deal with you today." Akane sighed before dropping the wooden sword on the boy and hurrying inside.

The rest of the school stared wide eyed at the event before them.

Nabiki merely shook her head.

"Yep, things are definitely going to get weird around here!"

Ranma stood nervously in front of the class, Neko cradled in his arms as the class stared back at him curiously.

"Class this is Ranma Saotome, he's a new student that will be joining us. He has just gotten back from a training trip to China so everyone give him a big Nihoa. Ranma, why don't you tell us something about yourself?" The teacher turned to the pigtailed boy.

Ranma looked slightly nervous before putting on a confident smile.

"Well my name's Ranma Saotome. I'm sixteen. My interests include martial arts and cats."

Some of the student started to look confused at this.

"I've been doing martial arts since I could walk and I've always liked cats. They're my favourite animal!"

"Thank you Ran-" the teacher began.

"I spend most of my time with cats. All types of cats! When I leave school I want to become a vet and open up a wild life preserve that specializes in looking after cats."

"That's great Ra-" the teacher tried to get in again.

"My faviorite cat characters are Garfield, Nuku Nuku and Tom from Tom and Jerry though I hated Jerry cause he's a stuck up little mouse!" Ranma continued to ramble on as the rest of the class looked on in growing confusion.

"I'm also a collector of 'Hello Kitty' merchandise and I've seen the musical 'Cats' nine times and-"

"THANK YOU, RANMA!!" The teacher yelled, finally losing his patience.

"Oh sorry." Ranma scratched his head in embarrassment as he headed towards his seat. Akane, who had been watching Ranma embarrass himself and in connection her, had buried her head in her hands.

"By the way I don't think the school allows pets in the building!" the teacher said to Ranma's back.

The Dark haired youth paused on the way to his seat at the back of the classroom. Then Ranma display his great physical talents by turning his head around to stare daggers at the teacher without turning the rest of his body around. Members of the class who had seen the film the exorcist were at this point utterly creeped out and beginning to hide under their desks.

"What!" Ranma whispered, glaring at the teacher.

The classroom teacher quickly felt his danger senses, which were genetically bred into all Nerima citizens, go off.

"But I'm sure we can make an exception!" The man smiled nervously as he sweated buckets under the teen's iron hard gaze.

Ranma's head turned slowly back around and he sat down at his desk. The rest of the class let loose relived sighs.

Akane Tendo shook her head in her arms.

'It's the end of my social life' she thought, depressed.

"Listen Kuno! I'm telling you not to fight this Saotome guy." Nabiki tried to argue with the kendo captain as she sat at the end of his medical bed.

"And I'm telling you foul mercenary that your poisonous word will not sway me from wreaking my vengeance on that animal, Ranma Saotome." Kuno yelled back.

Nabiki took a deep breath and counted to ten.

"Fine Kuno-baby but don't come crying to me when Ranma beats you to a pulp." Nabiki got up and start to walk casually towards the exit.

"Oh before I forget." The middle sister turned her head back to face Kuno. "For the love of god, don't attack his cat!" Nabiki warned, flashes of Ranma's Nekoken technique running through her mind.

"Hmm?" Kuno had a confused expression on his face.

"Just don't, ok?" Nabiki said before walking out and closing the door behind her.

She walked down the hallway before pausing as a thought struck her.

"Did I just accidently use reverse psychology on Kuno-baby?" Nabiki asked herself out loud before shrugging, unconcerned. "Not like it really matters if Kuno gets torn to shreds. Come to think of it, I forgot to tell him about the engagement!" Nabiki shook her head before deciding that she could sell that information later. There was already plenty of other students wanting to pay to find out the connection between the mysterious pigtailed boy and her sister. Smiling to herself, Nabiki skipped down the hallway, ready to collect some cash.

"So you're engaged to Akane, Ranma?" one of the boys sitting next to Ranma at PE asked as the others around him listened in.

Ranma nodded his head. It surprised him that the engagement had gotten all around the school and it was only half way through the school day. He scratched Neko's ear as the black and white cat curled up at his feet.

"It's true!" The boy said in excitement.

"Whoa!" said all the boys around him.

"So how long have you been engaged to Akane?"

"Have you guys kissed?"

"Have you made out?"

"Have you done more?"

Questions bombarded Ranma from all around. He shook his head vigorously in the negative.

"I haven't done any of those things with her!" Ranma exclaimed.

One boy snorted loudly, clearly not believing him.

"You're telling me you two are engaged and Akane hasn't even shown you her pussy?!"

Ranma's head shot up at this.

"Akane has a pussy? She never told me she had a cat!" Ranma said in annoyance before getting up and heading over to where the girls were playing baseball.

The boy who said the last remark froze.

"I didn't mean it like that!" he yelled to Ranma but the pigtailed boy was too far gone.

Ranma approached the baseball pitch and spotted Akane getting ready to bat.

Ranma cupped his hand to his mouth and called out to the girl.

"Hey Akane! I didn't know you had a pussy. Could you show me it after school?" Ranma's voice rang out across the field, echoing everywhere.

Akane froze, her face turned red from embarrassment, then anger.

"What!" she yelled, turning to face Ranma.

"Well you know how I like pussy so I thought you could show me yours back at the dojo?" Ranma yelled back as everybody who heard this jaws dropped. "Maybe you could let me stroke it?"

"Wh... I...You!" Akane sputtered in indignation, her anger so strong that she couldn't make her body move. All the other players had stopped playing upon hearing Ranma's supposedly perverted words, all except one key player.

"Akane look out!" someone yelled a warning.

"Huh?!" Akane snapped, turning towards the one that had yelled the warning. Her vision was obscured by a large, white sphere shaped object before everything went dark for Akane.

"I'm really sorry!" pleaded Ranma Saotome as he sat at the examination bed of Akane Tendo while Dr Tofu inspected a large round shaped bruise that was on her forehead.

"Yeah right, pervert!" Akane snapped in annoyance, wincing slightly whenever Dr Tofu prodded the bruise.

"No sign of concussion or any skull damage. Looks like you'll just have a little bruise for a few days." The doctor said cheerfully.

"I meant pussies as in cats. You know, another word for feline." Ranma continued to try and explain himself.

"Yeah right," Akane grumbled as Dr Tofu stuck a bandage over her bruise.

"It does seem like an innocent mistake to me, Akane-chan." Dr Tofu put in diplomatically.

"Humph!" Akane sniffed in disbelief.

"That's why I said I liked pussy." Ranma said, holding up Neko to prove his point.

"I bet your whole family likes pussy, you pervert!" Akane yelled in annoyance.

"Actually Pop's more of a cock man." Ranma said introspectively.

"What?!" both Akane and Dr Tofu exclaimed, eyes wide in shock.

Ranma turned to them in confusion.

"Cock. You know? Cockerel. Hens. Chickens." Ranma explained.

Akane slapped her hand on her forehead before realizing that it still had a big bruise on it and quietly ground her teeth in agony.

Dr Tofu looked less than impressed.

"I think you should stop with the double entendres, Ranma."

"Double en-what?" Ranma asked in confusion.

"Nevermind." Dr Tofu sighed as he walked out the room to answer a suddenly ringing phone.

"What did I do?" asked Ranma as he turned back to Akane.

"Just shut up you jerk! I've had more than enough of you today." Akane vented out.

"Fine!" Ranma said, looking insulted. "We know when we're not wanted. Come on Neko-chan! We're leaving!"

Ranma turned and walked out the room with his head held high. The black and white cat followed behind his companion, his tail pointing straight up in annoyance.

It was then that Akane saw Dr Tofu's strange behavior while he was talking to someone on the phone and realized who was coming to the clinic. Dread filled her stomach as she realized she was on the patient's bed and knew what that meant.

"Wait, Ranma! Come back for me! Take me with you!" She yelled after the boy to no avail as Dr Tofu reentered the room.

"Hi Kasumi! What are you doing here?" Ranma asked as he passed the oldest Tendo daughter on the way out.

"Oh I'm just returning some books to Dr Tofu." Kasumi answered, showing Ranma the books in her arms.

"Well Akane's in there getting patched up. She hurt herself in PE class today." Ranma told the girl.

"Oh dear, she's always doing that. Thank you for taking her to the clinic, Ranma."

"No problem. See ya at the Dojo, Kasumi."

"Good bye, Ranma."

"...Hmm... I wonder where that screaming's coming from, Neko-chan."

"Hello Kasumi, Akane. What happened to your back Akane?" Genma Saotome asked as he let the two girls in the house.

The dark blue haired girl stood with her back pointing at an odd and painful angle.

"Some special treatment from Dr Tofu." Akane answered as she let out a groan from moving.

"Yes. The boy did say you were at the doctor's. You should look after yourself, Akane. It's one of main points of being a good martial artist." Genma said with a wise look on his face.

Akane muttered to herself in anger. She then looked up and saw Mr Saotome for the first time.

"Nice cockerel, Mr Saotome." Akane said with a straight face.

"Yes, isn't he?!" Genma grinned as he hugged the bird in his arms. "I love cocks!"

Genma walked past the two Tendo Daughters. Both Kasumi and Akane watched the bald martial artist walk off, talking to the bird in his arms, before they faced each other and shook their heads.

Soun walked up to the pair before spotting his friend outside with the fowl in his arms.

Soun shook his head and smiled.

"That Saotome! He's always liked playing with his cock."

Both girls shuddered visibly.

"I could never understand why he liked those creatures. Now me! I'm more of a-"

"Don't say it, Daddy!" interrupted Akane. "Let me guess. You're more of an ass man and by ass you me donkeys."

Akane and Kasumi glared at their father.

Soun scratched the back of his head in embarrassment.

"Did you really see that one coming?" asked Soun.

"It was rather obvious, father." Kasumi said nonplussed.

"I couldn't help myself!" Soun admitted.

"Whatever." Akane sighed. "I'm going to bed. My back's killing me."

It took a long time for Akane's back to reset and it wasn't until Thursday that she could walk with Ranma to school.

"So you're saying I can't use the word pussy!" Ranma said in shock as they approached the schools gates.

"Not in my presence." Akane growled out.

"Not even when there's a cat there in front of us?" Ranma asked, testing the waters.

"No!" Akane snapped angrily.

"Not even-"

"Do you know where I am?" a voice said from in front of them.

Ranma attention was grabbed by the familiarity of that voice. He looked around before he spotted a boy wearing a black and yellow striped bandana and sporting a red umbrella, asking a student for direction. Ranma recognized the boy at once.

"Ryoga," Ranma said quietly.

"What, Ranma?" Akane asked but the pigtailed boy had already rushed away from her towards some dark haired boy.

Ryoga Hibiki was having a normal day. The norm being that he was lost. He sighed as he found out his location from some high school student.

"Furinkan?" Ryoga shrugged his shoulders. He had never heard of that place before.

It was then that he heard a voice shout out to him.

"Ryoga Hibiki, prepare to die!"

Ryoga froze as fear took over him.

'Not him!' Ryoga begged in his mind. 'Anyone but him!'

He turned and saw the familiar face off Ranma Saotome bearing down on him.

Ryoga's worst fear was confirmed.

The lost boy barely had time to get his guard up before Ranma was upon him.

End Notes: And that's chapter 4. Hurray!!

I left you on a cliff hanger. Sorry about that.

I was probably a little mean to Akane in this chapter. Sorry to the Akane lovers if there are any still out there. It won't be as bad for her in the next few chapters... well I'm not sure. It may get bad for her but this is not a 'Akane suffers for all she has done' kind of fic. Other characters will suffer too. Promise. All in the name of comedy I say!

Anyway please r & r and I'll get the next chapter up soon.