I hate my name
Pokemon R/S/E ONESHOT, Ralts' POV

Inspiration: Playing Pokemon Ruby again

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Lunla. What a dumb name.

Only a human as dumb as my trainer could come up with a name like that. And only a human as dumb as my trainer could give it to me as my new name after capture. What's wrong with calling me by what I am, Ralts?

I guess I have some bad luck. I end up getting captured by a rookie human trainer when I had escaped many others before. Maybe it wouldn't have been so bad if she hadn't given me and my teammates such stupid names.

Like her starting pokemon, Mudkip? She named him L'eaur. A Poochyena she had used to capture me with? Her name is Noirla. She evolved by now...thankfully, she and I have become friends. Helped make my life less miserable.

My trainer herself is weird. She's thirteen, has odd coloured hair and dresses in weird clothes. When she captured me, she introduced herself as Star and tried to be friendly. I only went along for the sake of giving her a chance.

But that was before she made me battle and I kept FAINTING!! The others on our team were ahead in strength, but I was lacking so much! The more I fainted, the more resentful towards her I became. I began to question how good of a trainer she really was. Suddenly...it came to a point where I just wanted to run away.

Will I ever make it out?

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"Alright that's enough for today, Lunla," Star called out to me. I gritted my teeth when she called me by that name, but I simply stayed quiet and did what I was told. "Come on...I'm going to set up camp with L'eaur and Silvshi. We'll keep training tomorrow and take on Flannery in a few more days."

Yeah, after that humiliating whupping we took from the fire leader yesterday, our human has been pushing us hard and training us in the wild. We've been everywhere...from the soot covered ground road to the shiny waterfalls to the bumpy pass just outside the city where the fire leader lives. We've been roughing it the whole time, which I particularly hate because of the constant attacks from other pokemon. This place was nothing like back home, where all the pokemon were much calmer and the only humans around were traveling people who sold stuff and little kids.

I felt a sting of homesickness again and I rubbed my stomach as I walked behind my trainer. I missed home so terribly, and I would do anything to go back...do anything, or risk everything.

Noirla, who's now a Mightyena, comes from the same place I do. Once in a while, the two of us sit down and talk about old memories from back home and talk about our lives now. But unlike me, Noirla likes her name and she's happy to be with a human. That's really easy for her to say...she's evolved and she's much stronger then she was before. She was bitterly opposed to my ideas of running away, and she told me that our human was still inexperienced and I was being harsh on her. I told her the amount of pain I kept feeling everytime I fainted wasn't worth being here, even if she is inexperienced.

"Hey Lunla, are you hungry?" Star called. She had set down a plate of food for everyone and was about to set a plate for me too. I waddled over and put my arms up for the food and she smiled. "Alright, I see you. Here you go," my human said, placing a plate of food down and stroking my head. I couldn't deny enjoying the affection she gives to all of us...nonetheless, it's still not worth it. I ate slowly while observing my partners.

Currently, we were in the shiny falls. There are a lot of Zubat here, so Star thought it would be a perfect training spot for me and Silvshi, an Aron. It was also a good place to camp out: the cave offered shelter from the elements and it had a huge pool of water for Drago and L'eaur (who had evolved into Marshtomp) to swim in (Drago is a Gyarados. I was shocked when our human was excited to catch a common Magikarp, but she dedicated herself to raising and evolving him. Too bad she can barely handle him). They were swimming happily right now, splashing each other and chasing away any pesky Zubats. For once, Drago actually did seem calm.

Noirla had finished her food and was licking the dirt off her paws. She hates being disturbed if she's cleaning herself, so I decided tonight wasn't going to be a good night to talk to her.

Silvshi was still eating. He looked tired, but when he raised his iron head, I could see he was smiling. I wondered why.

I turned my attention to our newest addition: a female Swablu that she had nicknamed Cloud. I've heard that Swablus like people, and Cloud was no exception. Before Star had given her the plate of food, Cloud had perched on her head and tugged playfully at her hair. The human was giggling and Cloud was chirping loudly. From my end, it sounded like more laughter. I felt slightly jealous, but I soon smiled at the realization that Cloud was going to find out how terrible this girl is with us pokemon.

"Alright, Cloud, enough. Eat your dinner. We can play later. All of us," Star said, looking at each of us. I kept my head lowered, but I heard various calls of agreement. Suckers. I then heard Cloud fly off the human's head and perch next to me with her plate of food.

"Hi!" she chirped in our language. I wasn't much in the mood to talk to strangers, so I kept eating quietly. "Hey, I'm talking to you!"

"So?" I mumbled.

Cloud hummed a strange tone. "You sure are cold. We're on the same team, right?"

"Unfortunately," I said with an edge of bitterness in my voice.

I could tell, even without looking up, that Cloud was hurt by my words. She thought I meant to offend her, but I didn't mean it that way.

That's not what Silvshi thought, though.

"Hey, Lunla, that was rude! Be nice to the newbie! She's a fresh recruit off the block here, and she'll be traveling with us for the rest of our journey. You could learn to show some hospitality!"

"For one thing, Silvshi, I told you all to never call me Lunla. I hate that name more then I hate our human. For another thing, I'm not one hundred percent sure I want to stay on this journey anyway, so hospitality is the last thing on my mind!" I growled. My eyes glinted off the light coming in from the roof of the cave, showing off my anger. Silvshi stood up in front of Cloud and narrowed his eyes.

"Don't try that, Ralts," he spat that last word out like dirt. "Are you still frustrated because Star is having problems raising your level? And when it seems you're close, you always end up taking a fierce blow that makes you faint?"

"You said it, not me," I said, swallowing another piece of food. Silvshi growled and pushed my plate away from me. "Hey, that's mine!"

"You can hardly appreciate our trainer. How can you even begin to eat the food she buys and feeds to us?!" he snapped angrily.

"We're the ones who earn the money through the battles. So technically, we're feeding ourselves. She's the one who gets the glory and the praise, though, not us. What do we get? A big nothing," I hissed. Cloud's eyes flickered with fear and surprise at my words. Ha. If she's smart, she'll fly out now and go back home.

"That's not true," the dumb bird protested. "Look, I know I only just joined in here, but I've been watching everyone closely. She works hard to train us all up in order for us to win those battles! That's what being a team player is about, right? I learned it after I hatched and all the Swablus at home spoke about humans!"

"You Swablus sure are a dumb bunch," I sneered. "Take a look at me...and you too, Silvshi! Why are you and I the only ones who haven't evolved yet? Noirla, Drago and L'eaur are all evolved...what about us? We're still weak...we'll never be REAL team players. We'll just keep on fainting and fainting...until we're reduced to nothing. But we'll continue to stand by Star...because we're just pokemon, and we're suppose to be quiet and only do what we're told...right?!"

"It takes a long time for an Aron to evolve," Silvshi growled. "As for you, you're so frail and bad at defenses that you can hardly stand up to physical attacks! Aren't fighting moves suppose to not affect you so much? You fainted a couple of times from taking blows from fighting pokemon! What is wrong with you?"

I froze and stared at Silvshi with such hatred. My eyes glowed with psychic power and I aimed a confusion attack at him. He stood there, as if nothing happened.

"Wha-!"

"I'm part STEEL type, you idiot. Good job, by the way, Star's on her way over," Silvshi said smugly. He led Cloud away and Star's shadow draped over me. Uh oh...

"Lunla..."

I felt myself get scooped up into her hands and made to face her. I struggled, cursing my small size...

...and without warning, I shot a blast of psychic energy at my trainer. Star shrieked and fell backwards, loosening her grip on me. It all happened so fast, but I felt like everything was moving in slow motion. Noirla's head was raised in shock, Drago and L'eaur had stopped playing and Silvshi and Cloud were speechless. Everyone knew I had problems with our trainer and I was unhappy...but no pokemon had ever gone so far as to attack their trainer before!

Did I even mean it? I wasn't sure. Maybe my anger or my powers got the better of me...

"Star!!" I heard L'eaur wail. He jumped out of the water and ran to our human, trying to comfort her. Since he was her first pokemon, it made sense that those two had a bond with one another that no one else had. And I couldn't blame the looks I was getting from the other pokemon, but L'eaur's face held such hate and disgust that I felt scared looking at him.

What have I done? I looked at Star, wondering what I should do. Suddenly I felt her emotions pour into my head through my horns. I sensed surprise, disbelief, shock and...

...pain...

I stared long enough to see a tear hit the ground. Our trainer got off the ground and, without bothering to look back, walked out of the cave. It got so quiet and tense...I was so sure this was the best moment to run away. It had to be. No one would care now.

So why couldn't I move?

Noirla was the first to break the silence. "Go after her, Lunla."

"Wh-what? Why should I?" I stammered.

"You attacked her and you hurt her. You need to say you're sorry." Noirla looked at me sternly. "I am so ashamed of you, Lunla. What possessed you to do that after everything our trainer has done?"

"She-"

"Don't even start on that crap again, Lunla. I don't want to hear it. You've been acting like a spoiled baby brat ever since you decided she's a sad excuse for a trainer. Need I remind you that all of us are still young and inexperienced as well?"

Noirla's words shocked me. Oh my Groudon...what on earth have I been thinking this entire time? She was right...all of us started out as inexperienced children and we were all growing stronger...only because we were now on a team. Had I really been thinking I was strong even before I was captured? All I knew what to do was growl and trick foes into lowering their attack power until they left me alone! Now, though...I could use psychic powers, make copies of myself to trick foes and even teleport us away in times of danger.

I couldn't speak. Drago, Noirla, L'eaur, Silvshi and Cloud were all waiting for a reaction from me, and I had no idea what my next move was. L'eaur was the first to do something...

...he pushed me into the entrance of the cave.

"Go find her and bring her back to us. It's dangerous and she's alone. Without us around, she could be attacked."

"If you're so concerned, why don't you go?!" I snapped.

"You want a chance to be stronger? Prove you're strong by keeping her safe...weakling." I was shoved to the ground, face first. When I looked up, I saw I was outside and L'eaur had vanished back inside the cave. Great...what was I going to do?

I realized how dark it was...the bright moonlight was the only source of light now. I looked around, but I didn't see anyone or anything. The coast was completely clear. It filed me with reassurance and dread at the same time. There were no wild pokemon to attack me now, but where was our trainer?

I decided not to bother. This was the opportunity I had been waiting for: to escape and go back home. Before I could even teleport away, however, I heard a voice call out.

"Lunla..."

No...not now, when I was so close!

"Hold on...I need to talk to you."

I turned to my left and, sure enough, there was my human. Did she sense what I was about to do?

Star knelt down and looked at me with a soft look on her face. I couldn't read any emotion from her, but I could sense some sadness with my telekinetic horns. I felt bad about hurting her, physically, but I wanted my freedom too much.

"Lunla...answer me truthfully...are you happy?" Star asked me. Instead of answering, I just looked down. I was secretly hoping I wouldn't have to answer her and she would just figure it out for herself. I felt movement and looked up. Star was staring at the moon.

"La Lune...quelle belle l'object..."

I stared at her, wondering what the heck she was saying.

"You know, when I first met you back at Route 102, I thought you looked exactly like a child straight from the moon. You looked just like a celestial being...and I bet your future forms look just as beautiful, if not more..."

Where was she going with this? The moon? What was this idiot babbling about?

"When I named you, Lunla, I decided it had to be something that derived from the moon. Something beautiful...and since lune is french for moon, and Luna is too common, I decided on something unique...I can see you hate me for it. That and the fact we have difficulties with training..."

...Oh...now I understood where all our names came from. She was naming us with names from another language...except for Cloud, I guess. It didn't make me like my name all of the sudden, but now I understood why I was named Lunla. And it was a rather nice name, now that she explained it.

"Lunla."

I looked up at her and saw she was holding my pokeball in her hand.

"You're my pokemon and I'm your trainer. But more then that, you were one of the first pokemon I ever caught and you're special. Therefore, I just want you to be happy. If you're not happy being with me on my team, then I'll set you free."

I stared in shock at what she was saying. Yes, it's what I wanted, but I didn't expect for her to actually let me free. She was also making me feel bad in the process and I hated that. I stayed rooted to the spot. When Star saw I didn't move, she let loose a long sigh...and broke the Pokeball.

That was it. I was free.

"Be happy, Ralts," Star said and went back into the cave. No more 'Lunla', no more training, no more getting beaten down by physical attacks.

No more Noirla...no more seeing the world...no more...

But it was worth it to go home, right?

Right?

"That's what I told myself that day the human released me," I explained to my son and daughter Ralts. "And since then, I have always regretted it. I had a truly amazing chance in this world and I lost it."

"What chance was that, Mommy?" my daughter asked me.

"Everywhere in Hoenn, the pokemon whisper about a kind human girl with a powerful team of pokemon by her side who saved the world from Groudon's intense sunlight. This human didn't gain a thing out of it. She didn't do it for fame, gratitude or wealth. They whisper she did it all for the world, unselfishly, with a powerful team of Mightyena, Aggron, Gyarados, Altaria, Swampert and a Dusclops. Those pokemon were my former teammates and the Dusclops was my...my replacement!" I said sadly. "I had the chance to do something for this world too, something I'll never be able to do alone. I was selfish and greedy and very spoiled. It was the biggest mistake of my life. So, children...if you get approached by a human and captured, stay by their side. Even if the beginning seems hard, humans and pokemon always grow together and become stronger. That's what could have happened to me if I stayed with them."

"A human boy approached me the other day but he didn't try to capture me, Mommy. He wasn't a trainer, I think. So we just played together. Is that the same?" my son asked.

"In a way. My dearest...perhaps when that boy becomes a trainer, you can go with him on your own adventure. Whatever you do, don't do what your mother did. Did the boy seem gentle?" I asked.

"Yes. My horns told me the human was nice and innocent."

I nodded. "My children, the future is ever changing, but the past will always have consequences on the most deserving of creatures. I'm one of those creatures. But one day, both of you will go out into adventure and become amazing partners to humans. For now, it's time for bed."

I watched as my two children huddled up in their leafy beds and fall asleep. Those two were the only things I never regretted in my whole life.

I am now a Gardevoir. I still live on the outskirts of Route 102. To this day, I never approach humans or go far out where they can see me. I keep to myself to atone for my mistakes. My psychic powers keep me in tune with the rest of the world. That's how I know what my former team is doing. They've truly gotten great. They saved the world from Groudon's intense heat and stopped Team Magma's evil. Now they simply just travel around, until I heard that my former human decided to make way to other regions. I wonder how the pokemon...my old teammates..reacted.

Mistakes can never be erased, no matter how hard one tries. The past can be cruel, but it's always there and it will always be a bitter reminder of the things one's done.

No one ever truly pulls away from it. No one.

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I think I drifted from it being a pokemon fanfic to a lecture of some type. o_O

I hope that I didn't make my team or my trainer image sound Mary-Sueish. I was just following the Ruby plot with exact events and what happens in the end.

Anywho, this was just another one of those "getting into a character's mind" fanfics. I decided to dive into a pokemon's mind and think about how they feel after being snatched away from their home so suddenly. Why did I pick a spoiled Ralts of all pokemon? Two reasons. One, it's a pokemon no one would expect to be spoiled or greedy. Two, I covered a few actual experiences from my Ruby game (like losing to Flannery and having trouble getting my Ralts' level up. I was actually worried she'd start hating me, but I never replaced her or released her).

I played around with two endings here. One was Lunla forgives Star for being inexperienced and tells the rest of the pokemon to call her Lunla. The other was this ending. I decided on a sad(ish) ending to make a Hurt/Comfort fic, along with a little life lesson. I'm such a sucker for those.

Don't forget to review!

-CeleBaby20