Hi. It's been a while, years in fact. You are all probably wondering why after years of silence I am coming back now and instead of updating I am posting an author's note. I need to explain what happened. I need to explain what my plans are now. I need to let you know I grew up.
So, first, let me explain what happened. I started writing these stories when I was in eighth grade and I loved it. I loved learning about the characters and growing. I loved the ability to write a chapter a day and post it. I loved all of it. My writing wasn't good though. It was very, very childish, and I wanted an opportunity to grow and have someone from an outside perspective teach me how to write better. Again, I started this when I was in the eighth grade. Not the best writing skills. As most of you can probably already tell. I also loved reading the fanfictions. I would comment on a lot of them and make my presence known. One day I was reading while I was also looking for someone to beta for me. I reviewed a story and a girl replied to my comment through private message. We started corresponding with each other and she offered to beta for me. She wanted to write stories with me. Readers, I thought I had made a friend. We opened an email account together to write our stories with, she would read over my stories and give me feedback, and I would go with whatever she said. I was weak. While writing these stories I began to realize my stories weren't mine anymore, they were hers. I foolishly went along with whatever she said. I started feeling this way when she wanted to write a Skip Beat story with me and I wanted the female characters to be powerful in the acting industry, she took that and wrote another character's tongue being ripped out because an actress went against my characters director position. A scene that wholeheartedly did not fit in with Skip Beat, in my opinion. I said I didn't like that idea because it was too much for the type of story we were writing. My comment was disregarded and that is how our story would have gone. Then as I was writing my Twilight and Vampire Knight crossover I wrote a scene with the werewolves. In it I indicated that Jake attacked Victoria. She told me that as she was taking animal biology classes only the alpha wolf can attack, the others were just back up. Thus, Jake couldn't have done so as it went against wolf behavior. Again, I foolishly went along with it. A few months later when I was in my own wildlife biology class I was taught the truth. Any wolf can attack, be it alpha or beta. I was furious. She was messing with my stories and with how my readers would understand me as a writer. If I am going to be a writer, then I wanted to be an educated one that didn't give out false facts without good cause.
Then I was being drawn away from my writing as well. There was always some sort of drama I needed to take care of for her despite her living states away. She would make up these friends of hers I needed to take care of for her and I felt I was connected to. I felt like I had a whole group of friends in a whole different state that needed my attention. Then if there was anything she didn't agree with I would get blasted by multiple "people" who were standing up for her. I wasn't writing anymore because I was dealing with numerous people who "needed" my attention. She would make things for me. Stories, drawings, etc., and if I didn't return the sentiment I would be given the guilt treatment. I jumped through hoops for this person and her made up friends because I didn't want to be told I was a bad person. Then she didn't want me writing anymore either, unless it was based around her. Writing wasn't fun anymore. It was a chore to ensure her happiness. She took the writer from me, and I foolishly allowed her. I know I was weak readers. I know I was foolish. I was young and I was tricked.
I started getting smarter though. I started pointing out that her other "friends" would say things that she normally would. She was getting weaker and soon her hold on me broke. I wish I could say right then and there I gained my writer back, but, just looking at my profile we all know that wasn't true. I have been working on my education and pushed my writing aside. Despite my degree and the work I have been putting into my second degree. Despite my career and family I have felt as if a piece of me was missing, and I want it back.
I decided to tell you the story because I don't want what happened to me to happen to some of the newer fanfiction writers. I want to use my experience to help others watch out for the signs of a manipulative friend online, especially with these sights where we should be able to depend on others to give constructive criticism and not take advantage of those that are still learning to write. Your stories are YOUR stories. You don't need to take away or add to just because someone is jealous that they aren't being noticed in your writing!
I've started writing again. Just not these stories. I have a new story line I want to put out. I want to write my own stories. I'm going to college for my english degree in hopes to learn to become a better writer. I hope to publish again soon. I hope you will read them and I hope I can grow as a writer. I want you all to know that Kyoko, Ren, Karin, Toshiro, Ichigo, Yuuki, Zero, Kaname, Bella, and, yes, even Edward are all very important to me. Especially while they were able to play with me. Even more so, Angel, Abideil, Bell are still with me somewhere. Mai, Rima, and dear Noi are always with me and hope to come back some day. I hope you will read of their adventures in different worlds yet again.
So, my dear readers, hello. I have missed you all so much. I am back. I am here to fight -I mean write- yet again. Allow me to reintroduce myself. I am GirlX901, you may all call me GirlX. My favorite anime character is Captain Toshiro Hitsugaya of the tenth division. My favorite book is Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte. I am a paralegal and a college student. Soon I hope you will enjoy my FemIchi series. Consisting of Ichigo Kurosaki as a woman and her story lines with different characters. While I still have you here allow me to send out some shout outs. To my dearest friend K.T. thank you for helping me through the dark parts. Thank you for not letting me give up writing. To my fanfiction readers that still check in on my stories, thank you for still believing. I am sorry for having failed you. And last but not least, to you, you know who you are, I've been doing a hell of a lot better without you.