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Choose Me

Chapter One


[AN]: First L/J! Hope it's enjoyable!


I banged loudly at the door of a nice looking townhouse. A few seconds later, a handsome, familiar face answered. The smile he was wearing immediately fell once he got a look at me.

"Lily… oh, shit-"

"Is he here?" I demanded.

"Uh, who?" Sirius asked, trying to give me an innocent smile.

I glared at him. He knew exactly who I was talking about.

"Look Lily, Prongs is my best mate. Believe it or not, I care about his safety…" Sirius explained to me in what must have been an attempt to calm me down, "Now, I know that if I tell you where he is, then his life might be put in jeopardy."

"Oh okay," I started, crossing my arms over my chest, "So you care about his health and safety, but you don't care that he made a complete fool out of himself at the party tonight?"

Sirius laughed to himself, "Actually, I thought it was quite funny-"

"Sirius, he had no fucking right to be that rude to my boyfriend!"

"What did you expect Lily, for them to be jolly good mates?" he returned, his joking demeanor gone.

"I expected for him to leave me alone. I thought he wouldn't give a shit over the fact that I had a boyfriend." That was honestly how I felt. After everything he had done… well, his actions back in school proved that he never cared for me as much as he said he did. He had no right to pop back up in my life and completely humiliate me and make fun of my boyfriend. Why the hell was he back now anyway?

"Of course he does, Lils. He still l- eh, never mind…" his eyes instantly looked away from my burning gaze.

"What? He still what?" I asked.

"Nothing. Forget I said anything," he said, looking like he was severely cursing himself for almost slipping up.

I felt even more compelled, "Fine. If you don't want to tell me, then I'll get it out of James. Where is he staying?"

Sirius spent a moment just staring at me with examining eyes. I was growing impatient and was about to tell him so before he stepped aside and nodded off into his house.

"Come inside," he said simply.

I gave him a skeptical look, but he quickly pulled me in.

"I have to write down the address," he explained, leading me into the sitting room of his parent's old house.

"James' place is unplottable? How long has he really been back?"

"For a few days now," Sirius shrugged off. He quickly scribbled something down on a ripped piece of parchment.

"Now read this," he handed me the piece of paper that revealed James' address and then walked over to the fireplace.

"What's that?" I asked him hesitantly as he walked towards me with a jar.

"Floo powder, silly. Take some."

I stuffed the piece of parchment in my pocket and then reached my hand forward. My fingertips just barely grazed the top of the grey powder when I froze.

"Is this a prank?" I asked him suddenly.

Sirius gave me an incredulous look, "Come on Lily, you know I'm not stupid enough to prank you."

"Why are doing this for me then? James is surely going to be pissed at you…"

Sirius shifted on his feet for a second and then shrugged, "Look, I love you both. That bastard that I call my best mate doesn't know how good he had it, and how good he can still have it."

Well that explained it all. I narrowed my eyes, "Sirius, nothing good is going to come from this. I'm only going over there to yell at him and tell him to leave me alone."

Unsurprisingly, Sirius only grinned at me, "Sure babe."

"Don't call me babe," I grumbled as I sunk my hand into the floo powder and extracted a hefty amount. Walking over to the fireplace and stepping inside, I glanced back at Sirius.

"Thanks Sirius." Without waiting for his surely humbled response, I threw down the powder and shouted out the address on the paper.

"Use protection!" I heard Sirius' handsome voice call back just as I was spinning off.

Bloody prat…

My feet slammed down in a darkened room. The surroundings were completely bare, and unfamiliar from what I could tell. It didn't look like a place that James Potter would live.

My teeth clenched as I thought back on the possibility of Sirius pranking me. Seriously, I would pull his hair out strand by strand if this turned out to be one of his jokes. No pun intended.

I pulled out my wand and whispered a quick lumos to light my way. By the looks of things, he had just moved in and he was just starting to move furniture in. So far, there was a couch, a coffee table, and a bunch of boxes congregated on the other side of the room.

I found my way to a hallway and turned into the first room I saw. Seems I struck gold on my first shot.

Holy fucking shit- talking to him alone like this was bad idea!

Inside the room, James was laying in his bed, face down, with the blankets draped around his waist. From the angle I was standing at, it was impossible to tell whether or not he was wearing anything else.

No, stop thinking about that Evans! I took a step back, preparing myself to run from the room. This wasn't exactly what I had in mind when I thought about confronting him. I'd do it another day, when I'd be more inclined to look straight at his frustratingly handsome face rather than his naked chest and ripping six pack.

Still walking backward, my foot caught over the corner of a box. I swung my arm backwards in order to try and grab hold of something, but all that accomplished was me knocking something off the wall. It shattered when it hit the floor and I fell to the ground with a startled yell.

James sat up on his bed faster than lightening and had his wand lighted on me before I could even blink.


I sighed, annoyed that he had recognized me so easily. I had only been here for a few minutes, and so far nothing had gone to plan.

"Sorry," I muttered grudgingly, "I think I broke your picture."

I reached for the ruined picture frame and flipped it over. It was a picture of Remus, Sirius, James, and myself in our 7th year. I knew that immediately because the picture James was hugging me to him. He would smile for the camera and then kiss my forehead…

"Evans, what the hell are you doing here?" James asked me, his voice taking on a harder edge. He summoned the picture from my hands, grabbed it from the air, and slammed it face down on his bedside table.

I rolled my eyes in an air of annoyance when honestly, I felt anxious and desperate. What the hell had I been thinking coming here? You're not allowed to go breaking into other people's flat's in the middle of the night. Especially if the flat is that of your ex-boyfriend. After a certain point it's classified as stalking. Damn it- Sirius probably had this idea in mind the entire time!

"I flooed." I said, as if that would answer everything.

"Okay well, why did you floo here? And who the hell gave you my new address?"

"Sirius." I didn't answer his first question; I was trying to give myself more time to think of a reasonable answer. I could tell him straight up that I had decided to come and yell at him for being rude to Cliff; most likely call him a few nasty names, and then leave with a sense of victory. Alas, that didn't seem like the best immediate conversation to dive in to.

I thought I would find him at home moping over my moving on. But unfortunately, that wasn't the case. James seemed perfectly fine. Fine enough to be already asleep, half naked.

Stay on track, Evans.

James cursed Sirius under his breath, "Bloody dog…"

"That still doesn't explain why you're here in the middle of the night. Couldn't whatever you wanted to do wait until morning?"

"I, uh- um. I…"

His lips curved into a smirk, "What, did you come to barrage me for teasing your boyfriend?"

I glared at his cavalier expression, "You were very rude to Cliff."

"Poor Cliffy."

I huffed and stood up from the ground, "You had no right to say those things to him. What did he ever do to you?"

His mocking smile turned into a hard frown. When did he start frowning like that? I had never before seen James look so menacing, "I can think of a few things."

I had a hunch that I knew what he was referring to, but I didn't want to assume. After all, he was the one who cheated on me…

"Look, I don't care what your reasons are. I just want you to apologize."

"Fuck that. There's no way hell I would ever apologize to your nancy-prancy, little bitch of a boyfriend."

"You don't even know him! And for your information, he's anything but a little bitch. He's more of a man than you'll ever be!"

James had some nerve to be laughing, "How many times did you have to practice that in front of the mirror before you got it to sound convincing?"

"None," I half lied. It wasn't in front of the mirror…

"Come on Lils, you know how much of a man I am. You really think you can compare me and little Cliff?"

"You're right James," I said lowly. He smirked arrogantly at me and leaned back on the bed. But then I continued, "I do know what kind of a man you are. The kind that fucks over anyone he cares about."

His jaw clenched and his nostrils flared. I could tell his breath had hitched and he was staring at me with wide eyes. It was a mere few seconds before he took another breath and smoothed over his expression, "That was a long time ago."

I scoffed, "That was barely a year ago."

"A year and a few months," he corrected me condescendingly, "Not barely a year."

"You haven't changed at all."

"You wouldn't know," he shot back callously.

I sneered, "You're right, I wouldn't. And I wouldn't care to find out."

Another flicker of something passed over his smooth features. We stared hard at each other for what seemed like forever before I suddenly shook my head.

"I'm leaving." I turned and started walking out of the dark room when his mocking voice stopped me again.

"Good luck going anywhere without floo powder," he laughed. The smirk had returned to his lips.

I twirled around, "You don't have any floo powder?"

"Nope," he answered, leaning back on his pillows and folding his arms behind his head, "In case you haven't heard, it's more conventional to apparate."

I rolled my eyes, "Fine, I'll just apparate then."

Again, he smirked, "I have wards."

"Well can you break the fucking wards for a few seconds so I can get the hell out of here?" I was fuming mad. Did he want to trap me here and fight with me?

James sucked in his lip and shook his head, "No can do Lily love."

"Fine! I'll just apparate in the bloody rain!"

"You should know Lily…" he called after me just as I was about to walk out of his room.

I sighed impatiently, "What now, Potter?"

"The wards extend a mile around my flat. Looks like you're out of luck."

I wanted so badly to slap that cheeky smile right off his face… "I'll walk the fucking mile then. I don't need your help."

James looked worried for the first time that night, "You're going to walk? Are you crazy? Do you know who could be watching my flat right now? No Lily, you can't."

"Don't tell me what I can and can't do! I'd rather take my chances with the death eaters than stay here all night with you!" I shouted at him.

That familiar flicker passed over his face again, and I finally recognized it as pain. I immediately felt guilty. I wanted to take it back, but I couldn't. I could never show that side to James. The side that actually still loved him…

I sighed, shaking my head, and quickly turned around. I needed to get the hell out of here, and fast.

"Lily, stop!" James yelled at me. I heard him jump off the bed.

I didn't stop, and continued towards what I hoped was the front door.

"Ow! Fuck!" James cursed out. I wanted to turn around, realizing that he must have stepped in the glass, but didn't. I walked faster.

"Lily!" The door was in sight, and I quickly reached for it. It easily opened for me and before I knew it, I was practically running down the stairs, James still trailing after me.

"Lily, I swear I'll hex you if you don't stop!"

I scoffed that time, "Sure you will…"

A hand grasped my arm and jerked me backwards. James whirled me around to face him, "Look, you-"

He stopped short and we both jumped when something banged on the door at the end of the stairs. It was coming from outside. James put an arm in front of me and pushed me behind him as he kept his eyes trained on the door.

The loud noise punched the door again before it was suddenly tugged opened.

"Bruno!" James recognized with a sigh, "You scared the shit out of us!"

"Oh, uh sorry mate," the large muggle said, coming through the door with rain dripping off him. James quickly stowed his wand behind him.

"It's fine."

Bruno spent a few extra seconds staring in appraisal at me, to which I frowned. He started sauntering off down the hall where I saw two other shaded doors. "I'll, uh, see you later then, mate." I didn't miss the wink he shot at James.

James nodded at him and as soon as he was gone, slumped against the wall and took a few deep breaths. I stared up at him, confused over why he was acting this way.

He sent me an annoyed look before carefully walking himself back up the stairs.

"Jeez, paranoid much?" I asked as I started to follow him, my previous attempts at an escape forgotten. "How much trouble did you get into when you were gone?"

"Shut up, Lily." He limped back through the door and over towards the couch. As he sat down he braced his bad foot over his opposite leg. He poked and pricked at it for a few seconds, gasping in pain every now and then.

Finally I got sick of him torturing himself and I started forward, "Here, let me."

I sat on the coffee table in front of him, and gently placed his foot in my lap. There was a considerable sized gash on the ball of his foot, bleeding miserably. I pulled my wand from my jacket and whispered a spell, summoning the remaining glass from his foot. A chunk ripped from the wound and made James hiss.

"There, it'll be fine," I told him as I finished healing it, "Maybe a little tender."

He snorted, "Yeah, you know I always did get a little hurt chasing after you. Someway or another…"

I scowled at him, completely appalled. Like what he had done to me counted for nothing! I pushed his foot out of my lap and stood.

"Look Lily," he said, instantly reaching out and grabbing hold of my wrist, "Just stay here tonight, and then leave in the morning when it's light out. Or tonight if the storm let's up, I'll let you borrow the cloak."

Like I would want to borrow it. One, there had been so many memories sneaking out in that cloak together that I knew I'd get sick if I was ever hidden under it again. And two, borrowing his cloak would only give reason for us to have to see each other again. Another option I couldn't bare.

"Stay here?" I repeated. Did he understand what he was proposing? He obviously didn't still care about me anymore, because if he did, then similar to me, he wouldn't possibly be able to sleep under the same roof as me. Knowing that I was so close…

"Yeah, you can sleep on the bed if you want."

"I'm not going to sleep!"

He yawned and laid down on the couch, "Whatever, Lily. If you change your mind there's some extra clothes in the dresser." By now he had pulled a blanket from the top of the couch and had closed his eyes.

Again, I scoffed. I couldn't believe this. Here I was, stuck in this hell hole with James Bloody Potter, and he was offering me clothes to sleep in.


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