A/N: I. AM. SO. SO. SO. SORRY.
IT'S BEEN YEARS. SINCE I LAST UPDATED. I AM SINCERELY SO SO SO SORRY ABOUT ALL OF THIS.
Instead of wasting your time with my apologies, here is the update you've all been waiting for since 2009. I know that I am the worst person ever, and I will humbly accept all the stones you decide to throw at me. Please, don't hold back. I deserve it.
Disclaimer: I don't own DGM.
And there he was again.
Allen eagerly leaned towards those deliciously soft lips, leaving all his morals and principles behind. He knew he shouldn't be doing this anymore, but this teenage lust of his was driving him crazy. The boy somewhat knew that he was weak-willed when it came to food, but never had he imagined himself to be so weak against other bodily desires.
Nevertheless, the cursed boy couldn't bring himself to regret what he was doing. Nor could he bring himself to stop.
Kanda was…just so delicious.
His fingers trembled with excitement as he grabbed and caressed the man's beautifully soft skin, moaning softly at the ripples of pleasure brought about by their tongues emerged in a passionate battle.
Allen moaned again as the other man's calloused hands grazed over his flushed skin, moving towards his bare chest and brushing against a sensitive nipple. The white-haired youth let out a startled but pleasurable gasp, breaking the kiss as he arched his back, inviting the other to touch him even more.
The pleasure was so intoxicating. Allen wanted more. God, he wanted all of Kanda.
Open his glazed eyes, Allen looked up to look at the face of the older teen, expecting to see dark, silky hair and piercingly wonderful midnight blue eyes.
Allen's eyes flew wide open as he stared at the mass of red hair and the smirking face of a one-eyed man.
"L-L-Lavi?" He almost screamed, as he jumped away from the other man, a completely startled look on his face. What…what's going on? His mind frantically asked, almost going insane when he found out that wasn't wearing anything except his black boxers. This induced him to a rather amusing state of shock, and even the cold wind coming from the open window could not snap him out of his trauma-induced reverie.
A chuckle came from the opposite direction, and immediately, the boy's head snapped towards the laughing redhead. This whole scenario was even more devastating than the Earl's announcement of destroying the world. Why the bloody hell was Lavi laughing? "What's going on, Lavi?" Allen asked, his voice grave as he threateningly pointed his left hand at the young bookman. "Don't tell me you were trying to rape me in my sleep, because if you were, even if you're my friend, I will kill you, and I won't even need the Fourteenth to coach me through that," he added, gritting his teeth as he grabbed the blanket with his right hand and pulled it over his half-naked body.
"Oi, oi, don't ya kill me for somethin' I didn't do," Lavi retorted, putting his arms up in defense. "You were the one who started it."
The cursed boy's eyes took on a bewildered look, his left hand dropping. "Huh?"
"Ya heard me right, Allen, darling," the redhead snickered as he reached for his shirt on the floor. "I just went into your room a while ago, since it was really cold and I wanted to snuggle with ya for some body warmth," the bookman grinned. "An' before I knew it, ya were already kissing me."
It was a good thing that the room was dark at that moment, or else Lavi would have seen Allen's face take in several shades of red. Oh dear, the younger boy thought. Was I having a flashback of some kind? Like the withdrawal syndrome drug addicts have when they stop taking drugs? But I'm not taking drugs! I'm just…just…addicted to a certain someone…
Gulping loudly, Allen took a deep breath and threw away his thoughts before they can turn into something unpleasant. "Why didn't you stop me?" Allen questioned Lavi, narrowing his eyes as he glared at him with an accusing expression. "You could have stopped me if you wanted to. It would have been so easy for you…so, why didn't you stop me?"
"Allen, love, if ya had been in my place, I doubt that ya'd try stopping yourself," the redhead snorted, ignoring the glare his friend shot at him. Then a rather lewd smile replaced his usual grin. "But Al, babe, you're one hot kisser, and damn your moans are a huge turn-on! I can't believe Yuu got to have that same kind of treatment thrice!" He whined and pouted like some thoroughly disturbing child. "It's unfair! How is he better than the great and awesome me?"
Allen rolled his eyes, using his last bits of self-control to stop himself from revealing the long list of reasons on why Kanda was better than the chatterbox bookman.
"Lavi," he started, taking a deep breath once again. "You've got thirty seconds to get out of my room. If you're not out after thirty seconds, I will use Crown Clown and escort you out myself, with the least amount of care possible."
"Aww, Allen, don't be so cold now. Why can't we continue what we were doing?" Lavi purred, starting to lean closer to the white-haired boy. "You liked it, didn't you? I could always make you feel so much better—"
"Twenty seconds," Allen growled, inching away from the bookman. "Fifteen. Fourteen. Thirteen. Twelve. Eleven. Ten. Nine. Eight. Seven—"
"Alright, alright, I'm going already," Lavi sighed, realizing that the other boy's sexual drive was over. He jumped off the bed and slipped on his clothes with such skill and speed that Allen couldn't help but wonder whether Lavi had practice in this sort of thing. You know, leaving his one-night stand partners before his grandfather could catch him with a naked woman in the same bed. "See ya later, Allen. Try not to dream about Yuu too much. Ya were moaning his name a while ago ya know," he grinned, winking at Allen's shocked face before silently slipping out of the room.
Allen stayed there on the bed, clutching the blanket around himself as he pondered on what form of suicide was the quickest and least painful.
Kanda was having a hard time sleeping, despite the heavy dose of sleeping pills he had stolen from the Infirmary. If Komui found out…not if the Head Nurse found out, she would kill him, but that was none of his concern at the moment.
His real concern was Allen. And what the fuck that idiot rabbit was doing to him.
It was all too sudden, really. How they were suddenly separated like that. He didn't even have a chance to say "goodbye" or "I hope you die out there" to the damn beansprout, and the only time he knew about the mission was through the note that Lavi had left on his bed:
I'll totally make Allen mine here in Egypt. So till then, don't ya try to kill yourself again, 'kay? Ciao and see ya in a couple o' months! Allen won't be a virgin by then. – Lavi
Kanda was already planning out how to effectively strangle that stupid redhead with his feet the moment they came back from their mission.
Fuck this shit, the swordsman inwardly growled as he hoisted himself up and started pacing around his room like crazy. He had already thrown the note into a fire, but its contents deeply disturbed him in a way that deeply disturbed him as well. He hated it, how it was, whenever he attempted to sleep or even close his eyes, images of Lavi having his way with Allen would always pop out. And whenever they do, he would always have this overwhelming desire to grab Mugen. If only he could. God, if only.
Okay, okay, maybe a part of him had already somewhat admitted that he liked the white-haired boy, but oh hell no was he that infatuated with him to actually feel jealous. And towards the idiot rabbit, of all people.
This is just a fucking phase, goddammit! I'm just fucking horny, that's all! He desperately wanted to rationalize everything he was feeling because it was driving him crazy, this lack of understanding (or acceptance) for his own emotions. He wasn't even supposed to have any emotions, damn it! He was a soldier! An exorcist! A religious tool for vanquishing akuma! He wasn't supposed to succumb to these "human" moments! He wasn't even human for heaven's sake!
The thought abruptly stopped him from walking.
That was it.
He wasn't human.
He can't fall in love. He's not allowed to.
Images of the past flashed across his mind, pictures in grayscale, of a young boy with a brilliantly warm smile, all splattered in red. Always, eternally red.
A bitter smile stretched on his lips, and he finally found the resolve to suppress his unwanted feelings for the white-haired exorcist. A kiss or two (or three) was harmless enough. But he was not in love with Allen. He cannot fall in love with Allen.
Because loving him would mean dragging the boy down to those bloodstained pits as well, and Kanda would rather die than stain that beautiful face with the red that he had been living with all these years.
Inwardly, he scolded his immobile arms. Even unconsciously, they had no right to touch Allen at all.
"Good morning, love."
Allen almost dropped his cup of coffee and hissed as some of the hot liquid spilled on his hand. Damn it, he inwardly groaned, last night's events unwillingly flashing through his mind. The boy looked down on the inn's wooden floor, looking for a hole that might swallow him up.
"You don't look good. Are you sick?" Lavi asked, taking the seat across Allen and staring at the boy with curious eyes. As Allen fidgeted in his seat, a spark of realization appeared in Lavi's green eye. "Hey, this is about last night, isn't it?" He asked, snickering. "Don't worry 'bout it, Al, babe. I won't tell anyone about this. And believe me when I say that Yuu is the last person who'd find out about what happened. I don't know what he'll do to you, but I think I'll get killed off first. And I'm too sexy to die, Allen. This miserable world needs more awesomeness like me."
"Ugh, Lavi, can you tone down your ego a bit?" Allen sighed in exasperation. It has hard to deal with the bookman so early in the morning, especially when he didn't have that much sleep (mostly due to the fact that the all-too-familiar image of Kanda's sleeping face kept on appearing in his mind whenever he closed his eyes).
"Can't. It's already built in at this level," the bookman smirked, and made a swooping movement to steal the other boy's bacon. What stopped him however, was a fork, so skillfully wedged in between his middle and forefinger, pinning down the cloth of his glove and almost cutting his skin. An ominous aura appeared in front of him. "You know Lavi," Allen spoke, and the redhead almost cringed at the killing intent in his voice. "You may steal a kiss, but you may not, in any circumstances, steal my food. Or else I'll kill you. Got it?"
"Y-Yes, got it, " Lavi nervously agreed. Allen was smiling politely, but the bookman could see the shadow of demon right behind him. He inwardly shuddered.
"Good," the younger exorcist chirped, and the food on his plate disappeared before Lavi can even heave a sigh of relief. "Now that we've got that cleared, how about we stop horsing around and finally discuss the mission, hm?"
"Yeah, I guess."
"So what's in Giza, anyway?" Allen asked as he took out the mission details, carefully folded, from his pocket. He had been to many, many places because of Cross' erratic traveling adventures, but Egypt was not one of them. Actually, the closest he had gone to that place was India, before Cross finally got fed up with the heat and lack of decent alcohol and traveled back to Europe. "We're going to a pyramid right?" The boy racked his brain for anything he might have read from a book somewhere. "That's where they bury their kings, right?"
"Yep," The bookman replied, amused at the expression Allen was making as he tried to recall what he could about Egypt. "Keep goin'."
"And there's supposed to be a lot of treasure buried with them, right?" A strange glint suddenly appeared on the younger boy's eyes, and this made Lavi laugh quite loudly, much to Allen's disdain. "I think you're missing the point here, babe," he mused. "We're going to the Innocence remember? That's what we're here for."
"Don't call me 'babe'," Allen grumbled, blushing. He couldn't help thinking about all the gold and jewels that might be lying around in there. If his calculations were correct, a whole chest of rubies could pay off half of his debts, and a whole crate of golden idol statues would then pay for the rest. Then maybe, his hair would finally go back to its healthy, light brown color. "And yes, I know that we're after the Innocence, Lavi. I'm just trying to be economical, you know. It's not like we get paid a lot as Exorcists."
Actually, do they even get paid at all? Where were his paychecks for the past months? He needed to see Komui about this ASAP.
"Well, yeah, whatever," the bookman dismissed. "Anyway, this pyramid we're in have been invaded and looted by countless bandits throughout the decades so I doubt that there's any treasure left." Lavi stifled a laugh at the disappointed look that was so obvious on Allen's face. "The pyramid, however, is a very tricky place. Its surface is actually made of a very resistant kind of rock that can even withstand explosions, so it's useless to try to bust our way into it. We'll have to actually walk through the front door, and try to find out way through the labyrinth inside."
"Yup. The inside's a huge fuckin' maze that has numerous booby traps in it. Lots of thieves lost their lives in there, though the smarter ones managed, not only to get out in one piece, but also to bring out treasure. The traps are also one of the reasons why archeologists couldn't study the structure well enough. They've lost a lot of people inside too. However," Lavi motioned at the mission documents Allen had placed on the table. "These disappearances are a little too much to be blamed simply on the traps. And the violent sandstorm's definitely Innocence-made."
"How'd the Innocence get in it, then?" Allen asked, frowning. There was something missing about the information they had, but he just couldn't put his finger on it.
"It's probably been there for thousands of years. The Egyptians probably thought it was a sacred jewel or something, and it was part of their custom to bury everything sacred with the pharaoh of that dynasty," Lavi carefully replied, avoiding Allen's eyes. "I think it was asleep or inactive till now." He wasn't able to mention to Komui about this one observation he had after the Fourteenth had started to awaken inside of Allen. For some reason, Innocence that had long been inactive for hundreds, even thousands of years, started to stir. As if something was forcing them to wake up.
What was it? The bookman had no idea yet, but he was definitely going to find out, sooner or later.
"Huh. That's odd. Why'd it only wake up now?" Allen asked. Lavi simply shrugged in reply. "I dunno. I guess we'll just have to find out for ourselves, huh?"
Allen had a bad feeling about this mission, but he just kept it to himself at the moment. He didn't want to give unnecessary speculations, especially when he didn't have anything to base them on besides his gut feeling, and that was definitely not enough.
"So what's the plan?"
"Oh, nothin' complicated, I guess," Lavi mused, as his neglected cup of coffee suddenly seemed to distract him. "We get in, try to survive, get the Innocence, and then get out. Oh, and if Noah appeared, just kick their assess for me, 'kay? And if that Tyki Mikk fella appears, try to at least cut off one of his arms, you know, to avenge your beloved ba-Kanda," the bookman teased, mimicking the way Allen called the swordsman. "Missing him, huh? It's only been, what, three days, you were having wet dreams about him already!"
"Shut up!" Allen exclaimed, blushing furiously. It was an extremely interesting expression, and it made Lavi laugh again, though, it did sting a bit to realize that only Kanda could enact such a reaction out of the younger boy. Early bird takes the worm, huh?
"Jeez, Lavi!" Allen grumbled, not appreciating the laughter that came out of the other man. "Stop it already! It's nothing like that. I don't have any special feelings for Kanda and –"
"So you're saying all of this is just plain physical attraction?" Lavi tested, idly licking his lips. "You're just horny, that's all?"
"Oh, don't say it like that! Ugh, I've got enough of this. I'm going back to my room."
Lavi didn't say anything to stop the boy from storming out of the ship's restaurant, and simply watched him as he made his way past the crowded tables, his face still red as ever. It was really cute to see Allen embarrassed like that. Will that be the same face he makes in bed doing you-know-what? Lavi was just dying to know.
Nevertheless, he wasn't that bad to force himself upon Allen. He realized it, when Allen had furiously denied any feelings for Kanda, that he was already too late in capturing the younger exorcist's heart. It hurt a bit though, and unlike Allen, he wasn't going to keep on denying it. He knew that Kanda had come to terms with his own attraction as well (how he knew this was a secret), though, knowing Kanda, he'd probably come up with some stupid reason not to acknowledge his feelings. That was just the kind of idiot his friend was.
The same would probably happen to Allen, though. Lavi's mouth cracked into a sad smile as he sipped the last of his cold coffee. These two morons were just too alike in that category. They had both once lost someone they loved dearly, and now they are afraid that happening again. Which is why they shut everything out, to protect themselves. What a bunch of selfish bastards, the bookman mused. Life's short and they'll never know when it'll end. It sucks to have regrets, ya know?
Lavi knew that more than anyone else. He was a bookman (in training) after all. He had seen much, experienced much. And lost a lot. He knew the feeling of regret more than anyone.
"Allen, love," he whispered to no one. "Don't make the same mistake I once made."
Allen lied down on his bed, staring holes on the ceiling as he tried to get the image of Kanda's face (specifically, his lips) out of his mind. He was tired, and he really needed some good sleep, but even if he was already a continent away from the swordsman, he was still keeping the poor boy up at night.
Good Lord, am I really this addicted to him?
The answer was "yes" and all facets of his mind repeated it in annoying chorus of affirmatives. He turned his body to face the wall, but that did nothing to help. He could still see Kanda everywhere. Oh darn it, where is Cross' hammer when you need it? He inwardly groaned as he gave up all hope for peace and quiet and stood up to pace around the room. Timcampy idly followed him, perplexed at what its master was doing. It bit and pulled on locks of Allen's hair to get his attention, until finally, quite fed up with what his golem was doing, the exorcist grabbed the flying mass and gave it an irritated glare. "What is it?" He hissed, and the golem fought under his hold. "Come on, Timcampy, stop throwing a tantrum. What is it?"
Right then, the right half of the ship exploded.
A/N: So there. Finally.
It's been a loooooooooong time. I know. I just, sort of, honestly, lost the muse for this story, especially when DGM went into that long hiatus and Kanda supposedly dies, and when he did, my heart and all my creativity died as well.
When I found the courage to check on the DGM manga updates and discovered, to my extreme shock, that there were like, 10 new chapters. And that Kanda actually lives and is more handsome and beautiful than ever.
And so my muse is back from the afterlife. And I live.
Because of this I'll probably be updating more often again. My fingers won't stop typing, and as I am writing this author's note, my mind is already making the next chapter.
I understand if you hate me for taking soooo long to update. But please, don't hate the story. I hope to see your lovely and encouraging reviews once more. 3