Shane entered his home, expecting his wife to be home, and some food to be eaten, but alas neither were there. He entered the kitchen and saw his son, Jared, at the table with a large book. He wasn't reading it or anything. It was placed a foot away from him, closed, and Jared just stared at it.

"Where's your Mom?" Shane asked.

"Gone," Jared replied, not removing his constant stare at the book.

"Is there food?" Shane question.

"No,"

"Are you hungry?"

"Yes," Jared answered.

"What's with the one-word answerd?" Shane demanded.

"That book is what," Jared said pointing at it as if it had just comitted murder.

"What is it?" Shane said staring at the book as well.

"My book report,"

"What book is it," Shane said picking it up a ruffling through the pages, "And why'd you pick such a big book?"

"It's Twilight, and I didn't pick it, Meredith did,"

"Jared, what have I told you about letting the woman contol the relationship,"

"Not to listen to you cause it will only result in a breakup?"

"No...That's what your mom said," Shane corrected, "Now what did I say?"

"Giving them control is a sign of weakness?"

"Correct my boy," Shane said, ruffling Jared's similar hair.

"And that helps me with my book report how....?" Jared drawled out.

"Well, I'm not so sure...here. What's the book about?"

"Some sparkly dude and some chick," Jared answered plainly.

Shane picked up the book and began to flip through the pages. He opened the first page and skimmed it, only to be intureppted by the growl of his stomach.

Thinking...Processing...Formulating.

DING!

"Hey Jare, how about I start this book for you. You know, just kind skim it and give you the mains and you can start dinner. Since your Mother is MIA and everything," Shane offered.

Jared appeared to go deep into thought, "Deal,".

"Ok then," Shane said taking a seat at the table and skimmed the first few pages, before actually beginning to read.

"This isn't half bad," Shane murmered.

"Great, you have fun with that," Jared said attempting to leave the kitchen.

Shane looked up from the book.

"Where are you going?" he asked.

"To watch TV," Jared said as if it were the most obvious thing on the planet.

"No, the deal was: I start the book and you start dinner,"

"Fine," Jared said reluctanly.

"How's the book Dad?" Jared asked.

"Hah. Did you stab Edward Cullen with a pencil or something?'...it's great. How's dinner coming along?"

"Oh! It's coming. Y-yeah, real soon," Jared said.

If you guessed that Jared hadn't even started dinner. Then you are very, very correct.

4 hours later (Yeah, Shane read Twilight in four hours)

"Shane, Jared. I'm home!" Mitchie called as she closed the front door behind her.

"Shane?" Mitchie said, walking into an empty living where she expected her husband and son to be.

"Guys?"

"DON'T TAKE IT PERSONAL! DON'T GET EMOTIONAL, YOU KNOW IT'S THE TRUTH! I'M TOO COOL FOR YOU!" came from the kitchen.

Why did this seem to typical for her family?

Mitchie walked into the kitchen and saw Jared standing on the table, wearing her pink 'Kiss The Cook' apron and singing into the whisk.

"Jare?"

The teen stopped in the middle of his performance. He turned around slightly and spotted his mother. Quickly, he ripped off the apron and through the whisk.

"H-hey Mommy," he said, still standing on the table.

"Jared, get off the tab-,"

"Jared! I finished the book! And I went ahead and did the paper. So there better be some good din-...Hey sweetheart, you're home," Shane said.

"Paper? You better not be talkin about Jared's Twilight paper," Mitchie said.

"Err...no Mitchie, don't be silly. Do you really think I would do Jared's homework?" Shane said, convincigly.

Until...

"It was all his idea!" Jared blurted.

Shane shook his head in dissapointment.

Mitchie snatched the paper and began to go upstairs.

She turned back around, pointing at Jared.

"You...grounded...You, couch," Mitchie said.

And with that Mitchie left.

Jared patted his father's back.

"You and that couch have been spending way too much time together," Jared said in a cheerful mood.

"Why are you so happy. You just got grounded,"

"Yeah, but you probably saved the paper tot he computer. Which mean I don't have to write it," Jared said, going upstairs and leaving his father behind.

"Well...You're missing out on a great book!" is all he could say.

"Sure Dad, whatever you say,"


I don't like this oneshot at all. Period. But it's been sitting on my desktop forever. So there. Review!?