Smoke and Mirrors: Chapter 24

By Morganperidot

Things at the hospital started out well. The Bureau had given Jack and Renee a reserved private birthing suite as a present, and they were able to settle in and enjoy quiet isolation. The first hour or so of labor was more exciting than painful; Renee had practiced the exercises and breathing that were supposed to make things easier, but it was mostly having Jack there that helped her through the contractions. Knowing how much he wanted this child and their family made it worth it to go through what was necessary to bring the baby into the world.

But when many hours had passed and things weren't progressing as they should, anticipation gave way to anxiety and outright concern. Eventually the young blond doctor pulled Jack aside, and they spoke quietly in a corner of the suite while Kim tried to keep Renee distracted. But Renee wasn't having any of that. "Tell me what's going on," she said loud enough for the doctor and Jack to hear.

Jack looked over at her, and then he went over to the bed and sat on the edge of it. "I'm sorry about that," he said.

"What's wrong?" Renee said. "Is there something wrong with the baby?"

The doctor came over to the bed as well. "There shouldn't be any problem with the fetus," she said calmly. "However, it may be time to consider additional medications or Cesarean delivery."

Renee just looked at Jack. "It's going to fine," he said. "The baby will be fine." His tone was straightforward and even, and she could see the certainty of it in his eyes. She didn't think he was trying to willingly mislead her, but Renee was becoming scared. It might be irrational, but the fear was there, waiting to pounce on her from where it was held at bay in a corner of her mind. She felt a couple of tears slip out of her eyes; she wiped them away with her hand. "Give us a few minutes," she heard Jack said, and then he stood up and ushered the doctor and Kim out of the suite.

"Jack…"

"I'm right here," he said. He closed the door and walked over to her. He sat back down on the bed and took her hand in his. For several seconds he didn't say anything, so Renee had to start the conversation.

"What's wrong with me?" she asked. "Why can't I do this?"

"Nothing's wrong," Jack said.

"Don't lie to me," Renee replied.

"I'm not," Jack said. "We had that ultrasound a week ago, and everything was fine."

"Then why can't I do this?" Renee said. She looked away as more tears came along with a contraction. She squeezed Jack's hand and tried to breathe.

When the contraction passed Jack said, "It isn't time yet."

"The doctor seemed to think…"

"We've never done things the way they are supposed to be done, right?" Jack said. "Why should this be any different?" Renee knew he was trying to lighten the mood, but she couldn't bring herself to respond in kind; she was too worried. "OK, listen," Jack said. "I have a story to tell you that…"

"I don't want to have a C-section, Jack," Renee said.

"Then you won't," Jack said.

"You don't know what…"

"Yeah, I do," Jack said.

Renee looked at him then and saw that fierce strength inside of him shining through his eyes. "You can't control this, Jack," she said. "You can't fix it."

"Have you forgotten who I am?" he asked. "I'm Jack Bauer. I can fix anything."

Renee felt her lips curl slightly, but her smile slipped away with the next contraction. Afterward, Renee said, "I'm scared, Jack. What if something goes wrong? What if something has already gone wrong?"

"You're my wife, and this is our child," Jack said. "We've been through hell together. We're going to make it through this OK."

"That's just BS," Renee said. "You don't know that." She pulled her hand out of his.

"Renee, I'm not afraid," Jack said.

"Why not?" she asked.

He reached out for her hand again, and she let him take it back in hers. "Sometimes I just know things," he said quietly. "I just know what to do and how to react in certain situations. It's not all cognitive plotting; you know that. So much of it is instinct first. In the field you have to trust those instincts." He smiled. "In love you have to trust them too," he said. "And now I trust them."

"Because they are telling you what you want to believe," Renee said. "Or maybe you just don't feel anything," she added. She immediately regretted how harsh that sounded. "Jack, I'm sorry," she said.

There was a long moment during which neither of them spoke. Jack's hand was still wrapped around hers. "My mother was in labor for a long time when she was giving birth to me," he said, his gaze returning to hers. "They wanted to mess with that too, but she was against it. So she told them to give her 24 hours and after that they could do what they wanted. At the end of the last hour I was born all red and shrieking and ready for battle."

"I love you, Jack," Renee said.

He looked at her. "I know that," he said.

"I shouldn't have said…"

"It was understandable," Jack said.

"No, it wasn't," Renee said. "I know how you feel."

Jack's lips curled slightly. "In every sense of the word," he said.

"You're coming on to me in the middle of labor?" Renee said.

"You started it," Jack said.

Renee sighed and tried to relax against the pillows behind her. "Was that story true?" she asked.

"It's the one my mother told me," Jack said. He gently put his hand on her belly. "This one is like us," he said. "I believe he's going to be OK. My heart tells me that, like it told me that I had to stop being such a fool and let you in."

"Especially after you knocked me up," Renee said.

Jack smiled. "Well, yeah," he said. He stood up and kissed her lips softly, but Renee pulled him closer and kissed him more firmly. Another contraction came, but this time it felt like there was some progress in her birth canal. "Call the doctor," she said. He moved back and looked at her. "It's OK," Renee said. "Just get her."

Jack left and returned with the doctor, who looked skeptical that there had been any change. However, when the doctor had reviewed the situation she said, "I'm not sure what you did, but things have definitely progressed. You should be ready soon."

Renee looked at Jack, and he smiled.

* * * * * * * * * *

Jack stayed by her side through all of it, and Renee was so grateful to have him there. In a way it all still seemed so surreal that she was suddenly a wife and mother. How was she going to juggle that and the FBI? What was Jack going to do? But none of that mattered the moment she heard her son's first cry and saw the doctor hand the baby over to a nurse to clean up.

And there was no feeling in the world like the first time she held their son in her arms, and saw him as a real human person who was the combination of her and Jack. "What do you think about the name William?" Renee asked Jack.

"I like it a lot," Jack said. He gently took the baby into his arms, and Renee smiled at the image of Jack Bauer, former rogue agent, former loner, former lost soul, and current husband and father holding his new son in his arms. It was the best sight she had ever seen in her life. And for that moment their child was truly a miracle to her, and it didn't really matter what else the future held.