The January Challenge: Create a humor fic, set in January using the line, "I can't believe you just did that!" - You can find the link to The Challenge Forum through my profile!

My Boyfriends Back

I felt the sun attempt to peek out from behind the thick and heavy clouds that seemed to congregate over Fork's, but it was quickly smothered before any real light had penetrated. I was almost disappointed – an afternoon in the sun would have been nice, a change from the rain that hadn't stopped this year. Mind you, it was only the middle of January, so it wasn't much to complain about.

I wondered if she had seen the sun too, from within the prison like walls of Fork's High School, a place I never thought I would find myself waiting outside again. I couldn't imagine that anything the teachers were explaining could hold her attention – she already knew everything.

Okay, so I might be exaggerating a little – she didn't know everything, but it must be close by now. This was Renesmee's third time through high school, and she had already completed a degree in Clinical Psychology and had achieved honours when she had undergone three years of Nursing before we had all moved back to Forks.

The fact that Edward and Bella were so keen to see her go to the school where they had first met had been the deciding factor. Even at the age of twenty five, Nessie was still so eager to please her parents. Of course, her parents no longer had a say in what she did, but they would always be overprotective of their little miracle – so would I for that matter.

Sighing, I eyed the other cars in the parking lot, remembering other times I had waited out here for Bella to show up. Of course, I had still been driving the Rabbit back then and not the most awesome birthday present a vampiric future father in law could ever give – a 1967 cherry red Ford Mustang Convertible in near mint condition. I still tear up a little when I turn her on.

Of course, my car wasn't the oldest thing in the parking lot, but it was the shiniest; it looked as though some students had even received cars for Christmas from their ever generous parents. Even in the constant gray and green surroundings you could see the high gleam I had worked on for hours far outshined all others.

I tried to get as much of my car related thoughts out of the way now, knowing that I had the ability to bore Nessie to tears relaying things she already knew by heart. It was probably her that had suggested this car in the first place, knowing I would cherish it almost as much as I cherished her.

Thinking of Nessie bought me back to my present situation – waiting for the school bell to ring. It was as if the last half hour was always the longest, like time deliberately slowed because it knew you were waiting for something. I tapped my fingers against the dash, silently counting the seconds down. When I had reached the count of fifty seven thousand four hundred and ninety two, the bell finally rang.

I popped open the door and got out to lean against the hood, making sure she would see me at the far end of the lot. Logically, I knew she would smell me the moment she stepped outside, but my illogical side still made me get out so all the boys that seemed to follow her around would see me too. Nothing intimidated a potential suitor like a seven foot tall boyfriend with muscles like a weight lifter to match.

I made a point of being seen with her when I knew someone was getting a bit too amorous. Of course, Ness was too nice to tell them she wasn't interested, she always felt like she was hurting their feelings. But when I found out that she was being bothered, I often felt the urge to hurt a lot more than that.

Several students gawked at me as the lot began to fill. I kept my sunglasses on and tried to look past them all; toward the building I knew she would exit from. It wasn't long before I caught sight of her alabaster skin and chestnut curls, causing a riot around her head in the light breeze. She was walking within a group of students, laughing at something one of them had said.

The smile I felt forming on my face at seeing her happy slowly faded as the crowd around her dissipated and only one person remained at her side. The boy was shorter than her by a head, but then Ness was close to six foot tall - he had wavy blonde hair and even from this distance I could see him eagerly going on about something and Renesmee's attention wavering. I quickly realised he was one of those boys.

Straightening up from the car I began to stride across the parking lot, which was beginning to empty. Those who remained stopped to watch me stalk toward the couple across the wet asphalt, looking over to where Nessie and the boy stood before turning back to watch me. I had gained a reputation in the last six months at Forks High as the scary older boyfriend of the hottest chick at school. They didn't know the half of it.

"So I was wondering, and I know it isn't for ages, but would you maybe - I mean you don't have to, but would you…" the boy's rambling stopped when he noticed how quiet everything had gotten and that Renesmee's attention had moved past him and on to me.

"Jake," her wide smile gave away just how eager she had been to see me too. I heard her erratic heart beat pick up a pace and an overwhelming sense of male pride washed over me to know that it was me alone that could cause that reaction.

I didn't stop until I was standing directly in front of her, but once I brushed against her, I couldn't help myself. Leaning down, I let my lips ghost against hers inviting her to kiss me back. She didn't disappoint, rising on her toes so that she could tilt her head and slant her lips against mine with heated passion. Her fingers gripped around my neck pulling me closer to her.

I indulged in my fix after a long day apart, letting her hands slip around to cup my cheeks, feeling tingles go up my spine as she shot erotic images of the two of us together into my mind. I had to force myself to remember that we had a rather large audience and one small schoolboy gawking at our over amorous public display that would probably give her poor father an aneurism.

"Oh sorry," Nessie gasp, realising at the same time that we weren't alone, "Michael, this is Jacob," she said turning from me to face her friend once again, gesturing to me with an endearing blush. The blonde nodded to me, looking a little bit sick – I flexed the muscles in my arms a bit and he gulped loudly. I tried not to smirk.

"And, ah, Jake, this is Michael Newton," she told me, her hand sliding up my chest, projecting an image of Bella's wedding photo's, her old school mate Mike Newton standing out. I knew there was a reason I didn't like the creep from a distance – I remembered how annoying his father had been.

"Hey," I said, tilting my chin in greeting, but offering no more. I slipped my hand firmly around Nessie's waist as she continued to mould herself subconsciously to my side, her hand staying on my chest, but no images accompanied it, "We need to get going," I said quietly in her ear, knowing he could hear me anyway.

"What were you asking me before?" she asked, her brow knitting together prettily as she studied the boy who was now shifting nervously.

"It was ah, nothing. You know, don't worry about it."

"No, really, ask me anything," she encouraged. Sometimes I wondered if she forgets how young these kids are and that she was in reality ten years older than them. She always seems completely oblivious to her appeal, but in turn that made her all the more endearing. In a way, I didn't blame these innocent high school kids for trying, but that was all they were ever going to get to do – try.

The Newton kid took another audible gulp and seemed to be pretending I didn't exist, looking at a point right above Nessie's right ear. "I was just going to ask if you were going to the Valentines Dance with anyone, you know, get in early and stuff, but I see you have a date. As I said, don't worry about it,"

"Oh," Nessie said, biting her lip and looking away. How she could not have seen this boy's infatuation I will never know, but she seemed to be carrying some kind of guilt now. "Look Michael, I'm sorry," she said. I drew her closer to me.

"No probs," he shrugged, going for casual and failing. "Anyway, I better get going – work and stuff," he said, already walking backwards away from us, The rest of the parking lot seemed disappointed that nothing more had happened and began getting into their cars.

Newton waved sadly at us, still walking backwards. Nessie smiled and waved back, turning around to walk toward my car. I watched the kids eyes travel to her denim clad legs, lingering on her backside and decided to torment him just a little more. Winking at him, I turned as if to follow her – not two steps later the crack of my hand on her backside rang across the almost empty lot.

I turned around again, watching his expression turn red before he scrambled for his car. Smirking and feeling very full of myself, I turned to follow Renesmee again, only to stop short when I found her frozen on the spot. She had her arms folded across her chest, and her foot was stamping out an agitated tattoo on the asphalt.

"I can't believe you just did that!" she hissed, starting a lecture that lasted well into the evening. I smiled, knowing that the look on the kids face was worth it.

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