It had been months since I last kissed him, and even longer since I had last seen him... I am still as broken as I was the moment I found he was dead.
"Victoria," Laurent's accented voice acknowledged my presence from somewhere near.
I did not answerer. I was too busy trying to find the part in my mind that I was saving for him.
"Victoria," Laurent whispered, placing a hand on my shoulder.
I jumped up and pushed him away, sending him flying into the trunk of one of the trees that surrounded us. I had found that part I was searching for – anger, betrayal. As soon as his back hit the tree with a crash, I was on him, pulling him off the ground by his neck and holding him to the tree.
"Why did you leave us," I screamed, my voice radiating through the mountains.
"I'm sorry," he whispered, his face in earnest regret and grief. "I didn't know my absence mattered."
"You left us," I sobbed, squeezing his throat tighter. "Most of all you left him, your friend. We have known each other for so long! How could just betray us like that?? You left us..."
Laurent looked into my eyes his with a tenderness I did not know burgundy could show.
"Ne criez pas, cher, cher ami(Do not cry, dear one, dear friend.)," he began in French, his native language,"L'auréole que les bords votre coeur font le lustre de soleil.( The glory thatedges your heart makes a chandelier of sun.)" He paused for a moment to lift his hand to my cheek and gently stroked it with his thumb.
"Soyez forts, peu un,(Be strong, little one.)," he continued."Il est seulement parti. Vous vous verrez de nouveau. Vous irez faire, vous aller faire, vous irez faire. L'amour est la forte et vraie, jolie fille.(He has only gone away. You will see each other again. You will, you will, you will. Love is strong and true, pretty girl."
Like always, his words healed the anger and hate I was previously feeling for him. As soon as I released him from my hold, he put his arms around me. I tried to fight him, but he would not let me go... I didn't really want him to.
"Victoria, life will continue," he urged.
"No," I screamed, falling to my knees, and he followed. "Non! Ma vie est finie. Il est parti! James is gone!"
"Votre amour est pour toujours. Do you understand? It is forever," he growled, holding me tighter. I just sank into gravity, letting someone else hold my weight for awhile, like James used to.
I was not used to having to hold it myself by myself for so long. I for decades always had James there to take in my heart when it was heavy... I've had to hold it all by myself these past months.
We must have stayed like that for an hour before we disengaged. I deiced I could hold my self together and got up. I walked aimlessly forward, and could hear Laurent following my trail wordlessly. It wasn't until I reached the precipice of the peak that I stopped. I stared out over the small body of water that separated me from the Port Angeles. It really wouldn't take that long to swim to the place my enemy breathed.
"Victoria, don't," Laurent begged, already knowing what was formulating in my head. "The family is strong. The boy has a talent that will destroy you. At least let me go over there as a friend and learn their strengths and weaknesses. Then I will come back and tell you."
I considered the thought, but something inside me screamed that it should not be that way. That it will not work. Something will be in the way. "No... It is too dangerous for you."
"You will not be able to kill him, Victoria," Laurent yelled with authority.
I turned around to look him in the eyes. They were full of emotion that made my heart stop aching for the tiniest moment.
"You have forever to heal," He whispered. "I will be here with you, I promise."
I gave him a small smile. "Forever is an illusion, Laurent. He was suppose to be forever, but... The truth of things is that nothing is forever! Happiness is not a permanent state. One day, a wrong choice will be made, and it's power is stronger than any force ever known. Life is real... Love is real... Death is real... Forever doesn't exist for anything, even you, even me!
"If I can not have my happiness, neither will he. I will, like he did to me, rip his joy from his reach, demolish the love he saved by killing mine. I may not be able to kill him, but I can dessicate him for the rest of whatever his forever may be."
Laurent spread his arms out to me, welcoming my body, but I refused with a shake of my head. "Not this time, Laurent..."
"I love you," he whispered closing his arms. "Please let me follow."
I walked over to him, and lightly kissed his hard cheek. "I beg you don't. You are my only friend, and I need you to be here when I get back... If I come back. Goodbye."
Before he could say anything, I turned and ran as fast I could off the cliff. As I descended down to cold, trashing waves of the Pacific's salty water. I felt everything fall away for the seconds I was airborne. Once the water engulfed my hair, my chest, my legs, and my feet, I was off swimming with as much strength and speed my body would allow.
Soon, I would be there. I would take what was taken from me... She would die and I would be satisfied.