Last Chapter guys.
It was now several hours since Ziva had confessed everything to Tony. He'd managed to coax her off the floor and onto her couch. They'd sat in silence for hours, considering, contemplating. Tony's heart was breaking for her. She had kept this secret for so long, and though he hadn't meant to, he had taken his anger out on her. He felt so guilty.
"Ziva how can I ever make it up to you?"
"I can not keep running Tony. Everyone I love dies, Tali, Ari, and so many more. I've been tortured and shot, but nothing has ever hurt as much as loosing the people I've loved. I need to go home; I need to face what I left behind."
It hurt Tony to hear Ziva's pain, and the thought that Ziva would leave was devastating. "Look, there's a difference between running and giving yourself a fresh start, giving yourself a chance to survive. What have you left behind? It doesn't sound like there's anyone left for you there. But I'm here, Ziva I love you, but if you leave now, you will be running away, running away from love, afraid that something might happen."
"I can not risk it?"
"Ziva, do you feel anything for me? Do you love me?"
Ziva paused, she had a choice to make, she could tell Tony the truth and be completely venerable, or she could lie, and then run to prevent anymore hurt and destruction. On one hand she could get everything she ever wanted, the love of a good man who understood her, protected her, could give her a safer life then she could ever have at Mossad or back in Israel. But Ziva had agonised over this for months, maybe even years. What would happen with their work? What would Gibbs do? Was love worth all that? Was it worth risking inconceivable heartache, loosing her job, her family at NCIS?
"Tony I. I."
Had she made the right choice? would she be able to get it out? Say it to his face? A single tear ran down her face.
Tony studied her face so intently his heart was on the line, he's never felt so exposed. His life hung in the balance of whatever Ziva said next. He was usually so good at reading her, but now, when he needed to the most he couldn't, what did that tear mean? What was going to come after that stutter? What was in her eyes? Was is love? Fear? Pain at having to reject him and what that might mean to their friendship? Had he wrecked it? Should he have just stuck with his plan to just make her happy no matter what role she played in his life? Oh god, had she made up her mind, should he just go? Walk out of this apartment and save everyone the pain and embarrassment? He looked at her, he stared longingly into her eyes.
"I do, I do love you bu…"
Before Ziva could finish her sentence Tony grabbed her and pulled her in for the deepest, most passionate kiss she'd ever experienced. Every emotion they could possibly imagine pulsed through their veins. His hands tightly clenched the back of her shirt and head, he never wanted to let her go, he tried to pull her in closer and closer. He never wanted this kiss to end. Ziva's claws ran down Tony, gripping his lower back. She gently leaned back his mouth still entangled in hers, he followed her, caressing her right breast while he manoeuvre himself to be on top of her. She moaned the most sensual noise Tony had ever heard. "I have wanted you like this for so long." Tony whispered into Ziva's ear as he suckled her earlobe then lay kissed all the way down her neck.
"I have too." Ziva confessed.
A few sensuous kisses later Tony reluctantly pulled away slightly, it was the hardest thing he'd ever had to do. "Ziva, I think we need to talk a few things through before we do anything more then this." Ziva didn't want to stop kissing him, or for him to stop kissing her. But she knew he was right, there would be nothing worse then sleeping with him and waking up in the morning, awkward and regretting what happened and having second thought based on all their worries about what a relationship between them might mean.
"What are we going to do about Gibbs and work?" Ziva asked
"I say we keep it a secret. At least until we know more. Besides, it feels naughty to have a secret like this."
"Gibbs knows everything Tony, he will find out."
"Please… With your stealthy ninja training and my precision lying? I've kept relationships from Gibbs before, I can do it again, and I know you could."
"I am not secretive"
"HA! There are so many unanswered questions about you."
"Like you never did tell me how you got those friction burns on your knees that time."
"I said I would tell you when I am sure one of us is going to die, so far, I have not needed to tell you."
"Look, We can do this."
"Someone could get hurt if we loose focused."
"Then we decide now, at work nothing has not changed. We go on teasing, and taunting and we understand that we have to do the right thing for the team, not for us."
"What if Gibbs finds out?"
"We deal with it then. Come on you can't tell me you're not even a little curious about if we can do this?"
"What if we don't work out?"
"Well, you'll have to leave NCIS" he said in his cheeky way.
"what? it's not an issue, it's not going to be a problem."
"Ok, but if it is?"
"It's not." Suddenly Tony heard a loud rumbling noise. "Sounds like your hungry, can I persuade you to skip the Chinese and head straight for the Italian?" He said giving her a very naughty and inviting look.
YAY!!!! is everyone happy???
Not sure if I should continue the Tiva story line and go into their secret relationship or if i should end it there. Let me know what you think, and waht you want.
Thanks again for reading!!! and thanks thanks thanks thanks to those who have reviewed!!!