As always, characters are Stephenie's...
Song for this is Bloody Valentine by Good Charlotte.
This has been in my mind for too long, and since I wrote a Saint Patrick's Day one shot, I thought I may as well do one for Valentine's Day. I need to do some AU background, because this is only a one shot, so there'll be no chance for the build up. I'm just going to let you sink your teeth right into this deliciously dark Valentine's tale. It's probably not what you're thinking as far as the romantic holiday is concerned, but I already went there for my green holiday one shot!
So, this takes place during New Moon, after Edward's gone. Bella and Jacob share Valentine's Day together in his garage. What neither of them know, was an extremely unbalanced Edward had chosen that moment to arrive back in Forks. In fact, he had just returned after Alice, despite having promised not to look for her future, lost Bella completely. (Remember, this is right before Bella would have been around any of the werewolves, as Jacob has yet to change, so Alice wouldn't understand why Bella would disappear.) In a complete panic, Edward returns to our dreary little town, and catches Jacob and Bella's exchange in the garage. He is, as I've already said, completely unbalanced. I mean, completely.
He dropped her off, and I followed him home, not caring for the treaty or boundary lines. Not caring for anything, actually. Only a small pink box. Aside from that, the one thing I desired above all others was gone from me, as surely as I had disappeared from her life in September. As I could not have her, I lusted after the only thing I could have.
Relief from the agony that had hold of my mind and my senses. Relief from the terror of knowing I was desperately alone in this world, and relief from knowing it was from my own doing. And, above all else, relief from the temptation of her scent that struck me as soon ass I set foot back in the area. Everything here was tainted with the beautiful tantalizing aroma of my beloved. The venom had been assaulting my throat ever since, screaming to satiated with the object of its desire.
As I ran over the blanketed forest floor, in and out of shadows, following the boy to his run down home, I was glad for the first time since that fateful day. I would never allow myself to give into my darkest desires, and I inhaled the night air deeply. Despite the proximity of the ocean, and a soothing easterly wind, I smelt her, as if she was the very forest itself. It was my penance for ever trying to force myself into her life, so I breathed it in regardless of my mind screaming at me to stop and my throat choking on its lust to taste the smell.
The absurdity of the situation was amusing even in my current state. I was crouched low beneath his bedroom window, as he readied himself for bed. Of course, he was thinking of her. At least his mind hadn't turned to less innocent thoughts. Yet. He, too, was thinking of the pink box.
What made it so difficult to bare was she loved him, too. That much was obvious, and the boy knew it better than I. He understood, but my beloved remained ever oblivious to their budding relationship. That was why, though I'd thought my mind incapable, I could still see the glaring irony.
I pushed her away, urged her to move on, and when she did, I couldn't handle it.
So I pressed myself against the side of the house of my enemy. It wasn't his tribe I had quarrels with, only him. He just was so blissfully unaware. I listened intently as silence stole through the night and the boy slept peacefully.
Had I been in a right state of mind, unclouded by the red haze of anger, guilt, shame, and the small pink gift, I might have waited to confront him. But I was not at all right in the mind. I hadn't been since I sinned so grievously against my love.
With a well practiced ease, I slid his window open, ans slid into the small room. I noted angrily that there wasn't much room to make my way around the bed, as it took up the entire space. Then, I was hit with the stench, which only served to expand my fury, as it offensively smothered Bella's delectable smell.
I couldn't help but growl. The boy merely turned over in his sleep. I hoped Bella wouldn't be too upset, but, standing over him, I knew what I had to do. It was clearest idea in my whirlwind mind. Even the most basic thoughts were hard to make sense of, and I felt like I didn't know anything at all.
My lip curled into a venomous smirk. In that moment, right and wrong ceased to have meaning. I felt unsure of anything, especially my mind. All I knew, was he couldn't have her. She was mine, regardless if I couldn't have her. She was still mine, and would never be his. I wouldn't allow it.
So I growled louder, noting how slowly he roused.
And he was close to his change. The scent of wolf was thick in the air. I would never allow my Bella to be with that kind of monster. It didn't, at that time, cross my mind what sort of monster I was, though I had dwelt on that in misery for nearly a century, and never more than since I left her side.
Something inside me had snapped. The connections of rational thought, and perhaps even speech, failed me now. All because of the damned pink box from the scene I had witnessed through his eyes earlier. It had been too much combined with the way his mind regarded my love. And though I recognized the catalyst for my sudden shove into the depths of my crumbling sanity, it felt comfortable. It felt natural.
I knew that when his eyes fluttered open, he would see my fiery black ones glowing in the enclosed darkness. He was far enough along in the change to have increased senses. Not that it would matter in the end.
His mind exploded with expletives as soon as his mouth did. Thoughts of a destroyed Bella flooded into me, but I had to ignore that I was the reason she was destroyed, and this boy had been the one to rebuild her.
"You should have loved anyone but her," I told him menacingly.
"And she can't love anyone but you? Is that it?" He spat it with as much disgust as he could in his current state.
"Not her," I snarled and delighted in the range of emotions that crossed his face to mirror his mind. He was begging me silently to let him go, but thought himself too proud to voice his terror. He was right to be afraid. This was, after all, the end of Jacob Black.
My smile curled wickedly over my teeth, exposing the venom that coated them in a thick sheen. He stared in horror, eyes wide. There was enough breath in his stunned lungs to begin to cry for his father, but in too swift a movement for him to even begin understanding, I ripped his throat out with a swipe of my fingers.
Vocal cords severed, and choking on his own blood as it surged into his airway, he made no more sound. The old man was waking, wondering if he'd really heard anything. I had but a moment until he rolled into the room, but despite the pooling blood, I was fixed on his wide, dark eyes. I had never watched the life drain from my prey's eyes before, but he still didn't understand.
When his thoughts turned to Bella, they were already fading around the edges. I saw as he remembered her growing one summer to the next as children, and how the friendship they shared was as natural for both of them as it had been for me to love her. His final thought, even as he heard the familiar squeak of his ailing father's chair rolling closer to his room, was that he loved her and she was loving him back.
With that, his mind faded into gray, then eternal black.
There was only an instant for my mind to snap a picture of the scene before me. Blood was everywhere, on the ceiling and walls, aside from the pool beneath the dead boy. It was a massacre, and I was almost stunned as I realized it had been done by my own hand. I shook my head back and forth, wondering when reality had ended for me, and I slid out the window, not bothering to shut it.
With no real intention or direction, I ran to the top of the nearest tree, and waited again. The flashing lights sent shadows of red and blue bouncing against the foliage, and rain pounded down from the heavens. Billy was beside himself with grief. Charlie was sick in the toilet. Finally, I dropped from the tree and sped into the forest.
Before realizing what path I was on, I found myself banging against a familiar aged door, not bothering to wonder why I ran here. I hadn't meant to. I'd promised, but it seemed natural. My hands were stained as I beat against the door, only hard enough to echo through the house, but not enough to splinter it. Smears of rust colored gore trailed in large swipes, as I rested my palms against the surface of the smooth wood.
Breaths came in ragged and I sobbed openly, though I didn't even know it at the time. Guilt, remorse, pain, anger, fury. They all seemed to be a constant red haze inside my mind. My head pounded furiously, and rain dripped through my soaked clothes. I used the fresh water as a substitute for the relief I couldn't get from true tears. Slowly, I let myself fall apart outside her door.
When the light went on like a spotlight, bathing me in a yellow glow, I sank to my knees. Bella opened the door, and I didn't even try to look up at her, though it had been so long since my deprived eyes had beheld the face of her beauty. I moaned and her scent, fresh and more sweet than anything on the earth, flooded into me.
I wasn't sure of anything: not right from wrong, not reality, nothing. But what I did know, was I loved her. More than anyone had the capacity to love another in the history of the world. It was impossible to understand her hold on me, but as soon as I breathed her in, the fog in my head broke, like the sun through clouds after a storm.
I couldn't feel the relief, because the phone rang. Someone to inform Bella what had happened. The rain struck me, but I was too wet to care. At the very least, it washed away the blood. I did not think for one moment Bella hadn't noticed it.
She returned with the phone, face pale and drawn as she stared at me. I could hear the voice on the line explaining to her about her friend. Slowly, the stubborn, unfrightenable Bella Swan's eyes widened, revealing the dark chocolate orbs that had so often haunted me. Tears dripped from them, and she hung up quickly, silently.
Careful not to startle her, I pulled myself from the ground. My eyes locked to hers, and after what seemed an eternity spent missing them, I felt dizzy in their presence. Tears still streamed down her slightly hollowed cheeks, leaving tracks of misery behind them.
"Oh, my love," I whispered, stepping toward her. She stood still. "Please don't cry." I reached an arm out, desperate to touch any part of my angel.
She still remained unmoved, so I moved forward again, this time with more haste. She had right to mourn, but I needed her to say something, to accept me back, despite the cause. I glanced to see my bloody hand reaching for her. "Please, Bella," I choked on her name, so unused to saying it aloud, let alone thinking it. "I'll wash my hands of this. We both can. We can start over. Start a new life. Just...just...please."
As if in slow motion, a small pink box fell from her fingers. When they hit the tile of the entryway, they spilled open, the phrases slapping me in the face each time I glimpsed a message. Hugs. Be mine. Call me.
The source of my pain, my fury had been a box of Valentine's Day candy? I was stunned as it all hit me, what I'd done all because a fucking box of candy. A sob sputtered angrily from my chest.
It had been so harmless, so innocent.
I watched the exchange take place. At first, smug to see her nonchalance about the frilly romantic holiday, but when he had handed her this innocent little trifle, I lost all reason. I didn't even care what it was, only that she had so readily accepted his gifts.
My legs gave out, in a moment of absolute weakness. I hadn't been aware I was even capable of collapsing, but as the side of my face hit the yellowing tile, one tiny pink heart lay inches from my eye sight, as if to mock my own stupidity.
I love you.
I curled in on myself, wrapping my arms around my knees. Somewhere, Bella was screaming, but I wasn't aware enough to know if it was for me or at me. My mind swam away, drifting where I couldn't reach it. Everything seemed so far away, even my beloved, though I could still feel the electricity of her fingers. She must be touching me, but I no longer saw Bella. I almost heard as my attachment to the present snapped away.
I love you, chanted through my head repetitiously. There might be no heaven for the soulless, but losing one's mind was the closest any monster could dare dream.
Pink hearts swam into my vision, taunting me with the innocence of childhood, and I was instantly lost.
My Bella, my Bella, my Bella.
A/N: Strange, I know. Tell me what you thought anyway!