36) Halloween Special! - Plants vs Zom- Ninjas
"What kind of stupid summon is a sunflower?" the first of the invasion force sneered at Naruto. The orange clad ninja simply smiled as he suddenly summoned a odd looking pitcher plant with three heads, as well as a second sunflower, the pitcher plant seeming to look at them interestedly.
"Screw the summons, just kill the brat and lets go!" the second ordered as he shoved his partner towards the plant line. The pitcher plant suddenly started firing green projectiles which seemed to hit him with the force of a kunai shot, only to vanish as they reached an invisible border between the ninja and Naruto.
After a few minutes, Naruto had summoned a row of five of the sunflowers and five of the pitcher plants, the area in front of them somehow completely bare of anyone. "OK, I'm going in myself!" The leader of the group said, for a large purple venus fly trap to appear.
The last thing he heard was a loud chomp, then Naruto smirked. "So, How do you like my new summon jutsu?" Naruto asked Kakashi, who just looked at the fact Naruto had effectively blocked off one of the major bottlenecks with some kind of battle plant jutsu, and wondered where he'd learned it from, while the rest of the ninja wanting to attack where he was guarding just ran.
"And they said learning to garden was a useless hobby for a ninja," Naruto sneered as he cuddled one of the sunflowers.
37) Get a Second Life
Kurenai and Kakashi looked at each other, sighing.
"Your team missing as well?" She asked, looking towards the other team leaders who were waiting on part, or all, of their team to arrive for the day after their latest teamwork exercises.
Naruto snoozed on a beach, half-watching as several girls played in the water, Sasuke fast asleep while Sakura and Ino sunned themselves next to him.
While it was a private beach, several girls had managed to petition Naruto, as owner of the area, for use of it, and most of them were among the ones playing beach volleyball and swimming.
Othello_Yaya: Naruto, Have you seen the time?
Naruto: Yes, yes, but would you rather enjoy this or go out and deal with D-Rank crap missions?
Othello_Yaya: Good point. I'm going to see if I can beat Hinata and Hanabi at volleyball.
Sakura got up, and joined the volleyball tournament. Yes, life was good, especially when you let the hell of the real world pass you by. Still there was one question that was burning to escape Naruto, that he felt he had to ask.
Naruto: Oi teme, why are you a girl?
Saki: Because I get 10 times less rabid fangirls.
Naruto: And 200 times the fanboys...
Saki: I hate boys.
Naruto: Okay, so... that doesn't stop any, does it?
Kurama: Ooh, I've found out your...
Naruto: Foxface, get off the chat service!
A red-haired girl slid up next to Naruto, looking up at the sun.
Kurama: No, I just want to sit here, and not be considered a force of nature... Please?
ShadowKing: Hey Naruto, who's the new girl? She looks like a force of sexy nature...
Naruto: She's... a good friend. And no hitting on her. She had some bad times with a guy a few years ago.
ShadowKing: I won't, too troublesome, Ino wanted to know.
Kurama: Yeah right.
Piglet: SHIKA! YOU PROMISED NOT TO TELL!
In the real world, Naruto glared at the red haired girl who was sat with her own laptop. "Dammit, now I've got to explain about my 'sister'... What excuse do I give this time?" He asked the kitsune.
"That I'm from another country, and that I'm not answering Ino's request to... 'Split a pink pie.'?" Kurama offered while pointing to some of the private messages she'd been getting.
"Send them to Othello_Nana, Sakura's other account. She'll get revenge on Ino for that." Naruto replied.
"Done... weren't you supposed to be somewhere an hour ago?" the kitsune asked as she forwarded the message.
"Damn. You keep going on the moderating of my plot, and make sure Haku and Shion don't do something stupid." Naruto declared, "And make sure Sasuke and Sakura get to the same place as me."
"Like the last time they plotted out how to give you five hundred children, only using five hundred wives?" Kurama snarked with a devious smirk. "Let's see... ah here's the boot commands..."
Before Naruto could protest, a dreaded message appeared on every computer in the village. "NOOOOOOO..." Sakura howled, "I had that game won!"
38) Service Not Found
"Is that... it's... it's our students! Our beautiful, most youthful students!" Gai cried out as tears of joy tracked twin trails down his cheeks. It was almost like he couldn't tell that each and every one of the students were a good deal paler than they had been the last they'd been seen.
"I just want to let you know... The Kyuubi accidentally crashed the village's ISP." Naruto explained while pulling out a catalogue. "But I suppose we could stand to stock up on supplies before the next raid... Sasuke, do you want more tomato juice?"
"How about a nice mission?" Kakashi offered while waving a scroll in front of Naruto's face. "We can get it done in no time, and then maybe some ramen and tomatoes, and Sakura can have a nice salad if she wants..."
"Kakashi, the village's ISP is down," Kurenai whispered, "Meaning no online for anyone."
"Why do you think I'm trying to get us away from Tsunade before she recovers from her online gambling site being down?" Kakashi whispered back with a nearly panicked look in his eye.
"Mapquest is down." She enunciated.
"I have an app for that!" Kakashi proclaimed while his phone dialed in to the site, only to show '404 - Site not found'. Kakashi tapped a few commands and it began dialing in through the phone lines to the Suna ISP. "Only a small delay... one... maybe two hours..."
"He's found an ISP!" One of the students called out, "He's got online up!"
"QUICK! TO THE COMPUTERS!" another student shouted, starting a stampede towards their apartments, only to have a mass of them stopped by chains bolting them to the ground.
"Now my Youthful students, let us train..." Gai stated calmly while pulling on one last chain, holding Sasuke in place as he tried to claw his way along.
"But we are going to beat Suna in Clan Wars tonight!" Ino protested as she watched Sakura struggle against the chains. "We need to run some practice battles in World of Tanks, they just updated the maps!"
"Maps? Updated?" Kakashi perked up at this news, thinking that Mapquest had updated again.
39) Facebook Games
"Hey cool, I'm in Pockie Ninja II..." Naruto announced as he looked over the new game he'd just discovered. "In fact... all of us Konoha Nin are here..."
"And they actually have your father, and you can actually fight alongside Hi-na-ta!" Kurama announced, "I've got a really good team going now."
"Hey! You knew about this?" Naruto asked as he looked over the team that Kurama had assembled. "Umm... there's only girls on your team aside from me... this isn't another attempt at getting me a harem, is it?"
"Would I have your mother on the team if it was that?" she pointed out with one of her clawed fingers.
Naruto paused to think, before groaning and placing his face into his palm. "Yes, because you think she'd give the other girls pointers with my father as a teaching model..."
Kurama got out a notebook. "Must use that in my counter to that evil book." she declared happily while scribbling down notes as Naruto glared at her. "Hey, rule 5: If you suggest it, and I can use it, it's fair game! Anyway, I'm going to do a DDoS on Mapquest again, don't let Kakashi know I keep bottlenecking it."
"And risk having to go through Kumo to get to Suna again? No thank you... Though I did get a couple numbers from girls there..." Naruto commented with a smirk. "You might even like one... she smelled of cats like Gaara smells of tanuki."
"Thanks for the tipoff." She said, smiling, "She was a fun girl when we weren't sealed into anyone."
"She mentioned much the same about you... and about sake and ice cream..." Naruto commented casually as he pulled out a photo album. "Gave me this copy..."
"Thanks," she offered, before going back to being the indirect sysop of Konoha's ISP node. "Anything else?"
"Yeah... Castle Age still lags out my system," Naruto complained as he pointed to where the game was still loading.
"You've got work to do anyway. Walrus and Monkey are still in the courts over Haku getting maimed." She pointed out.
"Tenten's getting it set up," Naruto answered dismissively.
40) Ninbusters: Where Bad Ideas Abound
The panda mask clad mythtern looked at the camera as she asked, "All set there?"
A thumb popped out in front of the camera turned upwards, getting a clap of pleasure from Panda. "Hello and welcome back Konoha, this is Panda, filling in for Walrus and Monkey while they're dealing with other matters. Today we're testing the myth that storage scrolls are bottomless. I can assure you that they aren't, but we're here to provide proof... and so..."
Tenten pulled out a storage scroll, "We are here in front of the Hokage monument, and will attempt to store it inside. Now, for something this size, we need a huge amount of chakra... FOX! GET OUT HERE AND USE YOUR CHAKRA!"
"Darn it... The ISP supervisor is having problems fixing that outage from earlier, and now this..." Fox grumbled, "Inari would be better at this you know, but she refuses to come out on camera."
"I know, but we need to prove this myth with a human chakra reserve so... seal the monument into this scroll please..." Panda ordered as she laid the scroll out at the base of the mountain. Fox let out a sigh as he walked over and eyed up the mountain for a moment before activating the sealing matrix with as much chakra as he could summon. "As you can see, there is not enough room in this scroll, nor chakra in Fox, to seal the monument inside so-" Panda began only to whip around as a blinding flash of light signalled that something had happened. As the camera focused, it revealed that the monument was now gone, though the ANBU that had been sitting around the headquarters were a bit perturbed about being forced to stop their plummets to death by whatever means necessary. "We are SO in trouble... PUT IT BACK! PUT IT BACK!"
Fox released the seal, only for the monument to return, facing the wrong way and upside down. "Umm... that shouldn't have happened..."
"Okay... first step is to destroy the evidence, then we kill the witness, and never talk about this again..." Panda commented as she pulled out a wicked looking sawback dagger. "Give me the camera..."
"You do know Inari broadcasts this across the entire Elemental-..." Naruto began, before the feed cut out.
A placard appeared on the screen reading 'We here at Inari Corporation would like to apologize for the inconvenience our programming has been having recently, in the meantime, please enjoy a recording of last night's Kabuki Theater."
Kurama munched on pocky as she watched Naruto and Tenten being chased by ANBU, several ninja, and lawyers. "Ah, the good old days, when Naruto got into trouble like this every day..." She sighed, "Gotta love when his ideas go bad."
She then picked up her phone. "Mum, it's Kurama. Yes, your son has got himself into trouble again. Flipping the Hokage Monument. Stop laughing... I know Dad will be pissed, but you're proud... Wait... he's laughing too? OK, When are you going to tell him his father is the Shinigami and you're... Oh, when he's THAT old..."
"Hold on, gotta go save him from the bloodthirsty monsters... and the other ninjas too I suppose..." Kurama offered with a sigh. "Stupid Lawyers ruin everything..."