This story I wrote in five minutes because for some reason my betareader account got disabled because my previous posts didn't count anymore. If you think this sucks, I agree with you. So don't flame me in reviews, this isn't a serious piece of work.

Disclaimer: Invader Zim belongs to Jhonen Vasquez, not me.

Sometimes, things don't translate so well.

On a February day in some nameless city in America, a tragedy was about to occur.

The Irken Zim, an alien masquerading as a human to gain the secrets to Earth's planetary defenses, loved a girl.

A human girl.

Well, perhaps human was stretching things a little, but she wasn't Irken.

Not knowing what to do, Zim went to a human information depot, or 'library' as humans called them, to try and find a way to tell his object of affection that he wanted her to be his love pig.

"So, on this 'Valentine's Day', humans give hearts to those they love? What an EVIL and INGENIOUS idea!" the little alien began cackling, much to the annoyance of his fellow patrons.

A few moments after landing on the lawn of the now-barred-to-him-library, Zim returned to his base to prepare for the big day.

====Valentine's Day====

"Gaz, accept this token of my affection and be my love pig!" Zim screamed in the Cafeteria, presenting a violet-headed girl with a -fresh- dripping heart that looked like its previous owner didn't skirt on poop-dogs.

Silence.

More evil silence.

"Talk to me after school Zim." Was all that Gaz said before rushing out of the room.

The End