A/N: READ HERE IT'S IMPORTANT!!!!!!!!!!! Those who have seen flight of the Concords will know the song if not look it up on you tube! It gives the fic awesomeness. It's called Boom: by flight of the concords. Check out some of there other stuff.

Anyway this is a song fic of when Emmett wakes up from his transformation and sees Rose. Its pure humour (I hope!) Remember, Alice and Jasper hasn't turned up yet.

Disclaimer: *insert witty disclaimer here.* oh waits that won't work. Don't own twilight or song.

Emmett singing.

Esme singing in a male voice.


Emmett POV.

The fire in my veins had now died down finally. But it seemed my heart had gone with it. Ah well. If I'm still thinking I must be alive. Right?

"Oh goodie. We got a thinker." A male voice said sarcastically and I growled, wanting to punch whoever said it. I opened my eyes and blinked a few times, seeing everything much clearer than I ever had before. Oh! SOMETHING SHINY! At this a boy who I recognized as the sarcastic one burst out laughing. "Shut it twig." I growl and he just looks at me before laughing again. I saw another man who was blond and looked older than me. He slapped the laughing boy in the head with a quick "Shut it Edward!" and turned to me, explaining why I had been tortured the past 3 days. I took in the information about me being a vampire and nodded mutely. For I just saw the hottest girl ever. The older man who identified himself to be Carlisle noticed my gaze and pointed at her. "That's Rosalie, or Rose for short." He said and again I nodded as I heard a beat and some weird music behind me.

"Oh my god
She's so hot
She's so flippin' hot
She's like a curry
I want to tell her how hot she is
But she'll think I'm being sexist
She's so hot she's making me sexist... BITCH!"
I "think" but as she stares at me with an "excuse me?" I realize I was singing aloud. Ah well.

"I need my 1987 DJ-20 Casio electric guitar set to, mandolin
YER - drop the drums!"
I said and started as someone walked past with a guitar, that I quickly stole but started to play anyway.

"Here me now!
I see you give the sign
I want to boom like it's never been done
Busting moves at the click boom of a gun
In the marquee and the bass is boom
And someone's smoking boom at the back of the room
And it's the first day of boom and the flowers are blooming
Drum and bass and the party is booming
Boom the boom like a rocket taking off to the moon
Boom boom like a bride and boom"
I sang dancing from side to side around her as I played the guitar.

"See you shaking that boom boom
see you looking at my boom boom
See you want some boom boom
it's clear as boom time boom boom"
I danced after throwing the guitar away realizing that the music was playing randomly in the back ground. Strange.

"Let me buy you a boom boom
You order a fancy boom
You like boom, and I like boom
Enough small boom lets boom the boom"
at the word 'buy', her ears practically perk up.

'Fast forward Selecta'! A woman called Esme sang walking into the room singing in a male's voice.

"Now we're rolling on a boom boom
Ridin' to a more private room
and we know what's happenin' we both assume
We're gunna boom boom 'til the break of boom"
Rose raised her eyebrows at this but I continued with my song.

"Who's the boom king?" (Who)
"I'm the boom king" (what)
Who's the boom king?" (Tell me now)
"I'm da boom king" (he's the boom king) man I liked this musical accompaniment! That Edward dude is rolling on the floor laughing his ass off. Man that needs to be abbreviated.

"Chuga chuga chuga huh huh huh
Chuga chuga chuga huh huh huh
Chuga chuga chuga huh huh huh
Chuga chuga chuga huh huh huh" after this my phone went off, from one of my old friends.

"And my phone is beeping it's b-boom boom
He's back from ten years doom and gloom
He said he had his boom chopped off in the boom
But the crazy boom still loves the boom" Rosalie looked a tad annoyed that I stopped singing about her for a minute but I go straight back.

"Unzip the boom and my lens goes zoom
my b-boom drops ba-doompa ba-boom
we both get freaky and the boom gets squeaky
and we boom boom boom boom boom boom boom!" I sang doing a rather inappropriate dance around her while she grins seductively at me. Ah yes my singing and dancing skills are awesome.

"Who's the boom king?" (Who)
"I'm the boom king" (what)
"Who's the boom king?" (Ha)
"I'm da boom king" (Emmett's the boom king) we finished while I slid down along the floor on my knees, before Rose jumps on me and starts kissing me. Ah yes. REEE- SULT!

Its alllllllllllllllllllllllll good.


A/N: so what do you all think of this one-shot, songfic humourous fic? REVIEW!!! Again if you don't get the song look it up and listen to it while reading. Heh I found it amusing Emmett calling Edward "twig." Heh.

Peace out!

Incoherant Reality.