Chapter One: I Remember

The sound of Lizzi's crying woke me up. "Edward, it's your turn," I muttered into my pillow.

"Of course love, go back to sleep," he whispered as he got up. I rolled over and snuggled back into the blankets. Edward's been great through everything. This summer, we've developed a plan. We take Lizzi Friday night through Sunday so Esme can get some rest. I've practically moved in with Edward and Esme and Charlie has accepted that they need my help.

Things have been hard without Carlisle. Carlisle was going home to check on us at around ten, leaving Esme and Lizzi at the hospital. He was just pulling out of the hospital when a drunk driver hit Carlisle's door. The impact killed him instantly. It wasn't fair. He had a good job and a good family. Why him? I guess the saying 'life isn't fair' is one of the truest things ever said.

And Esme. It killed her on the inside. She's been strong for Lizzi and Edward, but she falls apart when it's the two of us….

I can't think about this anymore, I need to get up. I rolled out of bed and took Lizzi from Edward's arms.

"Go back to bed, I've got her," I told him, rocking Lizzi back and forth.

"Are you sure?" I nodded and Edward reluctantly returned to bed. Edward was so sweet when it was our nights with Lizzi. He always got up, fed her, and changed her diaper so I could sleep. She was one lucky little girl, to have an older brother as loving as he is. Eventually, Lizzi went back to sleep and I lowered her into her basket before going to sleep myself.

I woke up to Lizzi's impatient cry. I glanced at the clock and saw it was almost eight, time to get up anyway. I got up and changed clothes while Edward took Lizzi. We switched so he could change, like we always did. I looked down at Lizzi and studied the features that haven't changed since she was born.

Her eyes were the same green as Edward's, the eyes I've come to love on both of them. Her hair was Esme's all that way: dark, thick, and beautiful. I like to think of it as princess hair. Everything else was Carlisle's: nose, skin, bone structure, height, and chin. Lizzi is still as beautiful and striking as the first time I held her. I never forget that I'm holding one of the few things Carlisle left behind.

The cliché 'you don't know what you have until it's gone' is very true. I never knew how much I cared about Carlisle until there was no going back.

I started when I felt Edward's arms wrapped around Lizzi and me. "You ready to go to the zoo?" Edward whispered in my ear. I twisted around and kissed him softly so we wouldn't hurt Lizzi.

"Of course, let's go." Every Sunday we took Lizzi to the zoo because, even at five months, she loved animals. Her little eyes followed their every movement and when we moved on to another animal, she would cry until she saw the new animal. I strapped Lizzi in her car seat before hopping in the passenger's seat. Edward had already put in my current favorite CD, Sarah Bareilles 'Little Voice'.

"What animals are we seeing today?" Edward asked, grabbing my hand across the consol.

"I love the monkeys and the giraffes," I told him seriously. He responded with the proper sincerity before cracking a smile at my antics.

"Those seem to be Lizzi's favorites as well." Gosh, could this guy get any perfecter? Why is he with me, someone who uses the word 'perfecter'? He noticed everything about Lizzi, Esme, and me while I can't remember Esme's favorite color. Lizzi started fussing in the back and I reached behind me so she could play with my fingers as Edward pulled into a parking spot. In another ten minutes we were standing in front of the monkeys and listening to Lizzi giggle at them.

"Come here love, you're too far away," Edward whispered gently. He pulled my back to his chest and I rested there for a few minutes, completely comfortable. "Do you remember what today is?" he asked in my ear.

"The last day of summer," I sighed. I didn't want school to start again. I felt Edward shake his head.

"Try again," he instructed. I thought hard but nothing special came to mind. It was Edward's turn to sigh. "We met a year ago today."

"You remembered?" I flipped around in his arms. "I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking about that."

"Of course I remembered. I changed that day and I never want to go back." My eyes started to water as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a jewelry box. "You didn't have to…" I muttered, overwhelmed.

"I know, but I wanted to." He opened the box and I saw a beautiful diamond necklace that made me gasp. It wasn't big, but it was simple and represented us perfectly. He turned me around so he could pull back my hair and close the clip at the back of my neck. "I love you, Isabella Marie," he told me, his voice gently.

"I love you too, Edward Anthony," I teased him breathlessly. I knew he hated his middle name. This time, he didn't say anything about it. He kissed my neck lightly on the clasp of the necklace and I moved closer to him.

"Plant my lips where your necklaces close."

Lullaby by The Spill Canvas

I turned around and kissed him. Edward moved his hand to cup my cheek and the other rested on my hip, keeping me close to him. The kiss communicated better than any words we could've said. Words, as we both agree, can be meaningless. Emotion isn't something that words alone can explain. Actions speak louder than words, and we were both screaming. The kiss was slow and gentle with love behind every move we made.

"Thank you," I breathed. He smiled and rested his forehead against mine.

"Thank you, love, for spending a year with me," he shot right back. I knew it was pointless arguing with him, so I merely stood there. Lizzi was still enjoying herself and making adorable baby noises. I glanced over at her just to check and I saw a three or four year old boy standing near the stroller, looking at Lizzi with a confused expression on his features. I moved closer to him, letting go of Edward.

"Hello. What's your name?" I asked him, kneeling down so I was on his level.

"Zack. What's her name?" he asked softly, looking up at me.

"Her name is Lizzi." Lizzi reached out a hand slowly and touched the boy's hand for a second before pulling away. She was watching Zack instead of the monkeys now. "I think she likes you, Zack."

"Zack, don't run away like that! You scared me-" A woman came running up to him but stopped when she was Edward and me. "I'm sorry. He was there and then he was gone. Sorry, my name is Hayley. I hope he hasn't been a bother."

"Not at all. Lizzi seems to like him," Edward reassured her. I smiled brightly at Hayley while Zack's attention went back to Lizzi.

"Is Lizzi your daughter?" she asked politely, looking over her son at Lizzi.

"No, she's Edward's sister," I told her. A lot of people thought we were married and Lizzi was our child, so we're used to it.

"Well, she's gorgeous. Zack, say goodbye because we've got to go. It was nice meeting you," Hayley smiled at us and Zack waved as he was pulled away.

"He looked like an OK kid, but he took too much interest in Lizzi," Edward frowned. I rolled my eyes and began pushing the stroller toward the giraffes.


I was still in bed, even though it was past ten. Since today is Sunday, Edward and Bella are with Lizzi. My thoughts were caught up in a hurricane of memories that I can't forget, can't pretend they didn't happen.

I know that I can't ever forget him. I also realize that I have come a long way down the road of acceptance. Bella has been a huge part of that. I know I have to stay strong for Lizzi and Edward and never let them see me cry. Bella, though, is the perfect person to help me and I use her. Bella says that she likes helping me in any way she can, and for now I'm going to believe that. Bella reminds me of him in her selflessness. Everything reminds me of him.

In some ways, I'm glad I can't forget him. One day, I'll need to tell Lizzi everything I can remember about her father. If I ever loose those memories, then I've lost her father and I simply can't let that happen. Today, I'm focusing on remembering.

I remember first seeing him.

I remember our first date.

I remember our first kiss.

I remember our first 'I love you'.

I remember his proposal word-for-word.

I remember our wedding.

I remember his touch.

I remember his smell.

I remember how he loved Edward.

I remember how he loved Bella.

I remember how he loved Lizzi, even before she was born.

I remember how he loved me.

I remember Carlisle.

AN: I'm so sorry I killed Carlisle! I hate doing it, I do. I was going to finish 'Amazing Catch' before starting this, but I couldn't. I write a lot better when I have two stories going on at the same time.

FUNFACT: I have high hopes for this sequel, but I don't really know where I'm going with it. I don't quite know how to go about writing a sequel, but I'm sure I'll figure it out.

The song in the chapter is one of my current favorites: 'Lullaby' by The Spill Canvas. Check it out if you want.

Music ADD will be the unofficial beta for this story as well, but she wasn't able to edit this chapter. Excuse any mistakes I might have missed. Thanks for reading and I like reviews, Emma