1My favorite main character is Renji Abarai. My Favorite antagonist is Gin Ichimaru. But my favorite side-character is Hanatarou Yamada!

Nowadays, chances in fanfiction are rarely given to side characters. Hanatarou is funny, and I like seeing his misadventures in fanfiction. So that's why, in lieu of stronger, cooler characters, I'm using Hanatarou, a timid, funny character (I've always been a comic man).


Chapter 2... I think: Dawn of Fear.

Hanatarou now had a licence. It read:

Hanatarou Yamada. Male. Member of the Shinigami Women's Association. Rank: Grunt.

"Wait a minute? I've been given a rank?"

Yachiru nodded. "Mm-hm! Everyone started out with a rank! For example:"

Yachiru Kusajishi. Starting rank: President.

"I started out like that because I founded it!"

Nanao Ise. Starting rank: Vice-president.

"She's one of the smartest people here!"

Retsu Unohana. Starting rank: Supervising chairperson.

"She doesn't do a lot per se, but she is the most responsible!"

Nemu Kurotsuchi. Starting rank: Fashion Expert.

"Huh? Fashion expert?"

"She's the only person who managed to make her Kimono ride up like a mini-skirt! She's rising quickly though!"


Kiyone Kotetsu. Starting rank: Big Dreamer.

Kiyone objects! "Wait! What?"

"For starters, your dreams about Ukitake."


Isane Kotetsu. Starting rank: The Human Whisperer.

"..... Huh?"

"She's been having strange nightmares. Random events at Icchi's school have been predicted through her nightmares."


And, Rangiku Matsumoto. Starting rank: Poster girl.


"Well, it's a step above Big Dreamer, which is higher than Grunt."

Hanatarou asks, "Wait! Where am I on the hierarchy?"

"The absolute lowest. The position in which anybody can tell you what to do."


Hanatarou didn't understand their hierarchy, nor did he understand why he had to be at the bottom of it, but one thing was for sure....

'I have the feeling that this will be WAY more dangerous than being hunted down by the Eleventh Company...'

Yachiru realizes she forgot something. "I forgot the documents in my room in the Eleventh Company! Grunt, go get them."

Hanatarou felt dead on the inside.... and he soon felt that he would also be dead on the outside as well. He just stood there for about an hour, paralyzed at the request he had received, before Nanao took off her glasses. Hanatarou fainted.

After Hanatarou fainted, he had a dream about him courageously making a mad dash into the Eleventh Company, hiding in multiple broom closets, and suffering a near fatal wound before making it to Yachiru's office. "Is this an office?" He looked around and saw a pink bed with very badly designed children's decorations on the walls. "It looks more like a little girl's bedroom..." Hanatarou found the documents on the table. He decided to rush back, but then he realized, "Why am I doing this in a dream? I can do whatever I want in a dream! But... If I don't listen, I'm gonna have to deal with the rage of the dream Yachiru fuku-taichou...." Even in his dreams... he's still a coward.

So Hanatarou tried to make a mad dash back, but he was cut off by the dream Kenpachi Zaraki. "Well, well! So you're the fourth company brat who's been running around?"

"N-no! I...."

"And breaking into a lieutenant's office? You've got serious guts kid..."

"N-no! It's just..." Then he remembered the condition he had been put under after the maid uniform incident. "You cannot discuss any activity of the Shinigami Women's Association with any men." Although, Hanatarou did not consider Zaraki-Taichou a man, he considered him a monster with devil horns who cut off his own tail because it slowed him down in battle!

But that didn't stop Hanatarou. He was still fully convinced that he was dreaming. He took a clumsy fighting stance with his Zanpakuto. "I can't worry! In this dream, I can do it too!"

Two minutes later, an unidentifiable body was sent to the Fourth Company. All recognized who it really was. Five hours later, the Shinigami Women's Association came to visit a person covered in bandages. His face wasn't though. It was Hanatarou. "Thanks for coming... ouch. Why does my lower half feel worse than my upper? It feels like nobody put bandages there."

Both Isane and Unohana blushed, though Isane's was a bit more obvious. "..... nobody put bandages there, did they?" Both Isane and Unohana shook their heads.

"We're sorry, it's just that Harunobu-san and Yasochika-san are elsewhere, and we're both.... women..."

Hanatarou sighed relief, as he would die if any woman saw him like that....

"But we did have to take your clothes off to wash them..."

Hanatarou almost died. Almost.

About two days later, the treatment was complete, and Hanatarou gave the document to Yachiru. "What was in that document anyway?"


Everybody fell.

Later that day....

'This is an annoyingly long dream.... it's almost like a full day.' ..... Should I tell him? No, I'll wait a little.

"Hanatarou? Can you come to the kitchen for a second?"

At first, Hanatarou thought about who that was, and why she needed him, but then he thought that if he didn't hurry, that person would get mad and yell.

When Hanatarou went to the kitchen, he found that there were three new people in his presence.

"Rukia-san! Orihime-san! Hinamori Fuku-taichou!" Though he yelled, he was just surprised.

New recruits. But more on that later....

"Well, I'm disappointed, but this is only a dream. They can't really be here."

Nanao states, "Yes they can. This isn't a dream." There goes the punchline...

"Eh?! You mean to tell me that I went into the Eleventh Division for real?!" Zaraaaakiiiii.... "And the Captain might actually come back to kill me?!" The second punchline....


How was the second chapter? It was WAY too short, but it's 3:00 in the morning, and I don't want to wait until tomorrow to come up with a better ending. And the fans of this must be eager for new material. Once again, I think crazy thoughts, but If I don't, who will?