A/N - Hi everyone. This is my attempt at filling the blanks in our knowledge of Alice's past history. I find her such an intrigueing character, and I wanted to see if I could figure out how she came to be the amazing Alice that Bella comes to know. I'm not sure how well this'll be recieved, so I'm just posting this preface and the first chapter for now and I'll decide whether to keep going judging on the response I get.

So, if you like this, and think that you'd like to keep reading, you're going to have to review and let me know that! I've enjoyed writing this much, but it's not half as fun if I don't know that there's people counting on me to know what happens next!

Also: I regret to inform you that I do not, in fact, own any of the Twilight books or characters. So, anything familiar in here is, sadly, not mine. I'm very glad that Stephenie Meyer is so willing to let me play with her creations, however. :D



I don't know how long I've been like this. For as long as I can remember I've had these premonitions, these visions. The very first is etched, with crystal clarity, into my perfect memory. My first of many.

His face—cold, pale and hauntingly beautiful—gazes up at the stars, his expression serene. My heart breaks with yearning.

"Jasper?" an unseen musical voice—my voice?—whispers, and his eyes are suddenly visible. Soulful golden eyes. He already knows; those eyes can see everything. "I love you."

Stars sparkle to life in those eyes. There is a whole universe of them, swirling around, dancing with light. I already know too, but I wait breathlessly.

"I love you too, Alice."

Before that, there is nothing. Only blackness. I don't know what it means, but I have discovered that it is not normal. I am not normal. I don't fit in—will I ever fit in?

My visions say yes. I've seen others too—others with golden eyes and peaceful faces—and I have seen Jasper and I with them. Laughing, hunting animals, flying effortlessly through rain-soaked forests... all together. I know each of their faces, their personalities, the tones of their voices. They call out to me:


Is that even my name? Could this vision of perfect harmony truly exist somewhere, in the sands of time, waiting for me? I must believe it is. It is the only thing that drives me on... apart from him.

Where is Jasper? I have been searching for so long... what if I never find him? But I must not lose faith. I will search for him forever if I have to—I have that long. With him, forever is nothing; and without him, I am nothing. Only with Jasper will I have a real life. I need him to be complete.

I must believe it is real. But how much longer must I search...?


Don't forget to review if you want more!