A/N: This was inspired by a crack-haiku I read not long ago. It goes like this: "All is fair in love. This includes chloroform rags. Goodnight, sweet princess." For some reason, it made me want to write this fic. Enjoy the madness and please review.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything; all characters belong to Tsugumi Ohba and Takeshi Obata, and the haiku belongs to someone whose name I don't know. I only own the fic itself, since I wrote it.
Warnings: AU, insanity, violence, character death.

~Goodnight, Sweet Princess~

Light didn't know.

Had he known, he would have never let her get that close to him. He never even liked her all that much. But one day, she had just randomly appeared in his life and he had taken her in without considering the consequences of his actions. If only he had known how much pain she would cause him... And not only the emotional pain that automatically comes with the feeling of being held captured like this, also the physical pain, the one he could never escape, no matter what he did. At least the emotional pain and stress could be calmed -almost forgotten- during sleep. When the physical pains entered, sleep was not a possibility.

Helpless, he could hear her steps; she was on her way to the room now. And he couldn't do anything... He couldn't stop her, he could barely move. The sound of the small key being turned in the lock made him panic, since he knew that she would probably bring more pain... When the door creaked and her happy and cheerful smile was revealed, Light tried to move, but discovered that he was still tied to the bed, and said realization made him feel like an idiot; he had been tied to that bed for a very long time. Funny, really, how his pride could still make comments on his thoughts like that. After all she had put him through, there should be no pride left by now.

"Silly Light, you should be sleeping. Don't you know how late it is, sweetie?"

Her voice made him winch in disgust. That high-pitched voice, dripping with sickening amounts of happiness and 'love', as she put it.

Insanity was a better word, Light thought, while closing his eyes to avoid looking at her.

"Light shouldn't be up this late, he needs his beauty-sleep to stay perfect and pretty forever."

He hated that. He hated the way she would use his name in every sentence she spoke. He hated how she would refer to everyone in third person whenever she wanted to, as if they weren't there. She even talked about herself like that and more often than not she would say things like 'Misa likes the expression on Light's face when she does this to him' or 'Misa loves the sounds Light makes when she cuts him here'. It was disgusting how she could slaughter a language like that.

The sound of her heavy boots on the wooden floor became louder and even though Light had closed his eyes, he could hear that she was now standing right next to the bed. Not only could he hear her, but he could also smell her heavy perfume, which was probably supposed to smell like some flower, but most of all just made him want to vomit. He opened his eyes to find her bending over him with a huge grin plastered on her face. Her -obviously fake- blonde hair fell down in front of her eyes and made sure he couldn't read her expression; she always wore that smile, and he had learned to predict her actions from the look in those eyes.

However, this time she was just standing there. No knife in her hands, no candles, nothing at all. It was very rare that she just stood there and watched him. She'd done it at first, but had quickly decided that it was more 'fun' to watch his pained expression when she harmed him.

Light moved his head slightly, trying to get to see her eyes clearly and figure out what she had in mind, but he couldn't twist his neck far enough without it hurting too much. And, in all honesty, the last thing he needed was more pain. Suddenly, her smile faded. It didn't vanish completely, it just turned... sad. Melancholic, perhaps? Placing herself on the edge of the bed and turning her back to Light, she tilted her head backwards and sighed while apparently staring at the ceiling.

"You know, Light... I really miss hearing your voice."

He'd stopped speaking some days ago. Until now, she hadn't cared. Or maybe she just hadn't noticed. It had been a while since Light had realised that he was going to die in this house, tied to the bed. He knew that she was going to kill him; he might as well refuse to give her the satisfaction of answering her when she talked.

"Please, Light, won't you say something?"

Why would I, Light thought. What difference does it make? He knew that nothing would change. If he chose to speak, sure, she'd be happy and refrain from hurting him for a few hours, but she'd kill him eventually no matter what.

After all, she'd killed before...

But Light was not allowed to continue his process of thought as she lay down beside him, put her arms around him and moved so close that he could hear her steady breath. Nauseated, he considered moving away from her, but was afraid that he might anger her. It was so very seldom that she acted like this and he didn't want to ruin it. She seemed to drift into sleep and Light tried to convince himself to do the same. It was difficult, however, to feel safe enough to attempt sleep when she was so close to him; he could risk being ripped out of his oblivious sanctuary by one of her 'games'. But he could risk that anyway.

Feeling his eyelids growing heavier by the second, he tried to remember how exactly this had started... he remembered that it had been hot outside. Summer. Sun, insects, loose clothes, beaches...

And Light fell asleep at that moment and for the first time in what could be either years or hours as far as he knew, he dreamt about the last weeks he remembered before this madness...


Summer was slowly changing into fall and Light Yagami sighed, content with his surroundings. The café was small and chilly, and he had really needed a break from the unbearable heat outside. He'd never really liked August much; the weather was too unpredictable for his liking and there were bugs everywhere. On the edge of desperation, he had chosen to flee from the hot day and caught himself really liking the place he'd fled to. A waitress with too much make-up on had brought him his glass of cold water, which he had only ordered so he would be able to escape the outside, if only for a little while. He just had to remember that he was supposed to help his younger sister with her homework later. Knowing Sayu, it could easily take all night to get her to understand something as simple as math. Then again, Light was just being a bit arrogant. Personally, he believed that he had the right to, since he was practically a genius. He smiled a little and let out another content sigh as he decided that nothing really mattered right at that moment. Actually, despite of his sister needing to steal his whole evening and despite the heat, it was a beautiful Friday.

"Mind if I sit here?"

Light looked up, surprised, to see a smiling girl with unnatural blonde hair tied up into two pigtails. She was wearing a small black dress and a lot of black eye-shadow. She was also carrying a tiny purse in her right hand, black and patterned with little skulls all over. He didn't see why she would want to sit with him since there were quite a few free seats as far as he could see, but he nodded and smiled politely. The waitress came over once again and the blonde girl ordered a piece of low-fat cake. When the waitress brought it, the girl thanked her and turned to Light.

"Would you like some? It's really delicious."

What an odd question.

"No thank you." He tried to maintain the polite smile and seemed to succeed. She smiled again and took a bite, trying to get the fork to avoid touching her lips, since she was wearing some kind of lipstick. Or lip-gloss. He'd never really known the big difference between those two things...

Light shifted and started to feel a little uncomfortable when the girl looked at him again. They sat in silence like that for a while when the girl deemed it appropriate to introduce herself.

"I'm Misa Amane, by the way." She was still smiling.

"I'm Light Yagami." Her smile grew wider, making Light even more uncomfortable.

"You're probably going to think I'm some weirdo, but I just sat here because I thought you were really pretty, Light."

To be frank, Light was actually beginning to doubt her sanity, but he just shook his head; he knew he was very attractive and he got those kinds of comments a lot. The girl, Misa, continued, obviously encouraged by the fact that Light didn't seem to think she was weird.

"And, uhm, I was wondering if you'd like to go out some time?"

Okay, what was wrong with this girl?!

"Do you usually ask strangers out like this?" It came out a bit harsher than intended and her smile changed into something slightly embarrassed.


For the third time, Light sighed, this time slightly annoyed. But for some reason, he was struck with curiosity and decided that one date wouldn't hurt anyone. Besides, she was kind of good looking and it wouldn't exactly harm his reputation. He wasn't usually this spontaneous...

"I can give you a call sometime?" Yes, that seemed respectable.

After letting out some kind of victorious squeal that did nothing to hide her triumph, the girl pulled a pen out of the small purse and scribbled her phone-number onto a nearby napkin along with her name, which proved useful when Light realised that he'd forgotten it. Misa. Right. The smile on her face was almost ear-to-ear by now and she started chatting happily. After a few minutes, Light noticed that her voice was kind of high-pitched. Even more so than his sister's. Just that made him almost regret what he said, but then again; he could always refrain from calling her and as long as she didn't know his phone-number. And even then it wouldn't be hard to block her calls.

After listening to her for a little while, he'd discovered that she was a nineteen-year-old actress and model, which explained her good looks. He hadn't been participating in the conversation other than the occasional 'mhm' or 'sounds nice'.

Luckily, something in the purse seemed to be vibrating and she pulled out a cell-phone and was seemingly yelled at by some manager who was scolding her for being late, judging by her answers, which included trying to convince the furious manager that she was just about to leave the café anyway. Giving Light an apologetic look, she held the phone away from her ear while whispering "Please call me!" Light smiled, wanting to appear understanding, but felt relieved when she got up and left; once again he was able to enjoy the beautiful day from a safe distance. He decided to stay for a little while before having to return home.


"Light! What've you been doing all day?" Light rolled his eyes at the voice his sister was using. It was her usual 'Light-probably-had-a-hot-date-today'-voice.

"Mind your own business," he replied, only causing her to giggle.

"I knew it. Light had a date." Sayu almost sang the words as their father entered the hallway where Light was still in the middle of taking off his shoes. The small-talk and teasing continued like that for quite some time while they entered the kitchen where their mother had announced that it was dinner-time. She apparently found it necessary to remind Light that it was important that he 'was a gentleman and didn't force the girl into anything'. At one point, Light half-yelled that he hadn't been on any date, which caused the rest of the small family to chuckle at his frustration.

When they had finished eating, Sayu followed Light to his room, since he'd promised her to help her with that math she had so much trouble understanding, but for some reason, he kept thinking about that girl he'd met at the café. That huge smile of hers was a little scary, now that he thought about it. He probably shouldn't call her. No, definitely not; he didn't even know her, and as far as he knew she could be just as weird as she'd seemed.

He tried to focus on helping his younger sister out, and he seemingly succeeded in doing so, because after only an hour or so (not nearly as long as he'd expected), she thanked him while apologizing for wasting his time and disappeared into her own room. Not really having anything to do, Light decided to go to bed early. He said goodnight to his family and buried himself beneath a few blankets before drifting off to sleep.


The next morning, there was a note in the mail for Light.

It was just scribbled upon a page that appeared to have been ripped out of a notebook and there was no envelope, which meant that she must have put it directly into the mailbox herself.

Remember to call me, Light!
Love, Misa.

The text was accompanied by a small drawing of a smiling heart next to the name. Mature, Light thought, rolling his eyes. But how did she find out where he lived? Even if he ignored the message, he'd have to call her in order to ask. He briefly wondered if she'd had that in mind, in which case, she'd be far more intelligent than Light had guessed. She probably hadn't. But, since it was Saturday, he decided to call her later, considering that she was most likely asleep. It was really early after all, and he didn't want to be a bother, no matter how odd this Misa was.

After a few hours of reading random books, he decided that it was appropriate to give Misa a call. He went to his room, where he grabbed his phone and the napkin from the café and called the number. Almost immediately, the phone was answered by that high-pitched voice.

"Hello?" She didn't sound tired. Light assumed that he hadn't disturbed her in the middle of anything.

"Hi, this is Light. From the café yesterday?"

"Oh, hi, Light! I was afraid that you wouldn't call me!"

"Well, that explains the note..."

"Oh, right, sorry about that. I must seem like some freaky stalker." She laughed.

"No, not at all," Light lied, "I'm just curious as to how you knew my address."

"Well, I'll tell you if you'll have lunch with me?" Light struggled a bit to not let out some irritated sound.

"Okay, when and where?"

"How about... the same place as yesterday, in two hours?"

"Okay, I'll see you later, then."

"YAY!" Light almost jumped at the happy outburst, "I can't wait to see you, Light!" He couldn't exactly say 'likewise', since it would be a very obvious lie, so he just tried to laugh and said goodbye before hanging up. He got some of his growing frustration out by almost slamming the phone onto his desk and decided that he didn't bother to change.


Luckily, it wasn't nearly as hot outside as it had been the previous day. Actually, it seemed that it would be raining pretty soon. Light had brought an umbrella, just in case.

When he got to the café, he quickly spotted Misa at a table, waving at him to gain his attention. She was dressed in another black dress and had chosen to wear a large amount of spiked bracelets and collars as accessories. It didn't look very good in Light's opinion, but he supposed that they just had very different tastes in clothing. He sat down at the table and the waitress from earlier came over to take their order. They both ordered salads and as soon as the waitress was out of sight, Misa turned to Light with one of her big smiles on her face.

"I'm so happy that you called, Light!" Light didn't really know how to answer without sounding rude, so he just smiled and let her continue.

"It wasn't all that hard, finding your address. I just typed in your name on my computer and found your college's site. After that, it was almost too easy." She laughed.

"I never expected to be eating lunch with a detective-model," Light said, hoping that it sounded like a friendly joke and that his sarcasm would go unnoticed. She laughed again.

"Don't be flattering like that, you're just making me blush," she said through her laughter and Light could only hope that she'd stop laughing, since she was being rather loud. She stopped and started talking about how much she liked the café. Light had to agree with her and when the waitress brought over their salads, they were talking about the weather; Light couldn't help but wonder if Misa actually cared, if she was just interested in talking to him or if she just didn't know what else to talk about. In Light's case, it was definitely the last option, but he pretended to care anyway.

"So, Light, I'm guessing you're not seeing anyone at the moment?"

"Not at the moment, no." Oh no, she was going to ask if they could be going out again, wasn't she?

"Well, do you want to go out again sometime, then?"

"No, sorry, I just don't have the time." That wasn't true, but he was a fairly good liar. Actually, he was a really good liar. He just didn't want to see her again.

He paid for his salad and left, noticing that Misa hadn't even answered.

And as he left the café, he didn't turn around.

So he didn't notice the look in her eyes...

~End of chapter one~

A/N 2: This was going to be a oneshot, but I'll split in into three chapters (for now). So... was it okay? I actually think that it's kinda good, but is that just me?
Now, I know that this might seem like your usual PWP-LightxMisa-kinda-fluff-fic. But that is why I put in those first paragraphs. I am going to turn this into something very cruel, involving stalking and violence (ect.).
Review? Pretty please? :)