A short introduction before I begin:

Special thanks to Pattie Mayonnaise, a picky and wonderfully helpful beta.

In this collection of one-shots, a myriad of non-canon, underappreciated pairings will be explored. However, these "crack shipper" ficlets are not intended to be all out romance; they are meant to spark ideas. Metaphorically, instead of giving you a fire, I'm handing you tinder, wood, and a box of matches. So read these awesome, completely random shippers and go build me a bonfire.


1. Listen (Tophshot)

They are possibly the worst couple ever. She communicates through sound, the one thing he can't make; he communicates by sight, the one sense she doesn't have. It is simply impossible for them to have a proper conversation. Certainly, she talks to him. She talks about anything that crosses her mind. He listens, too. You can tell by the way he gazes at her so intently, and won't look at anything else. Sometimes, though, she is silent, and just sits beside him. Everyone finds this rather pointless. What is she doing – listening to him? Everyone knows he's the listener. He's the one that quietly watches you while you're talking and offers a silent answer when you're done. Listening to him – that's a joke. No, it's a one-way thing. So what if sometimes during their "listening" sessions, she puts a hand on his shoulder just as his brow begins to furrow, or says something totally random and he nods like he knows what she's talking about? That doesn't prove a thing. Everyone says it: they're the worst couple ever.