Disclaimer: I don't own RENT

"Joanne Honey?" Maureen called her girlfriend "What are doing?"

"I'm making a Disaster plan" Joanne told her

"Why?" Maureen asked "Are you planning to cause a disaster somewhere? Can I help?"

"No Maureen!" Joanne told her "It's for the loft and it's to help us in case of an emergency"

"Why the fuck do we need that?" Maureen asked "We make fires all the time and nothing bad happens"

"Maureen Last time there was a fire Roger locked Mark in the bedroom and told him to burn as he jumped out the fire escape and Collins hid under a blanket while Angel yelled at him" Joanne filled Maureen in "That's not safe"

"But it's funny!" Maureen said laughing "Can I help you make the plan?"

"I'm almost finished" Joanne told her girlfriend as she frowned "But you can take take this 5 dollar bill and the paper to the copy maker and make a copy for everyone!"

"Alright I will...." Maureen told her

"Good and Maureen....Don't forget" Joanne told her

"I won't I promise" Maureen said as she took the paper and 5 dollars and skipped off

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(*Later at the loft*)

"FIRE!" Mark and Roger yelled

"Everyone run!!!!" Mimi yelled

"Hide!" Collins yelled

"No wait!" Joanne yelled "I made a safety plan! lets all follow it!"

"What Plan?" Mark asked

"The one Maureen made copies of!" Joanne yelled back "Maureen diden't you give them the plan?"

"Oh you mean this plan?" Maureen asked pulling the plan out of her pocket

"Now if everyone would calmy read the plan we could make it out safely!" Joanne told them

"Gimmie that paper!" Roger yelled as he grabbed a piece

"Rog! Don't grab!" Mimi yelled as she grabbed a piece

"Guys! Chill were going to die!" Mark said as he grabbed another piece

"Ahhhhhhhhhhhh! I see the fire truck outside!" Angel yelled as she grabbed a piece

"STOP CLUTTERING ME EVERYONE!" Maureen Yelled "I can't see the fire I'm going to be the first to burn!"

"I smell smoke!" Collins yelled "I don't see the fire either! where could it be? Mark and Roger's bedroom?" Collins asked as he grabbed a piece of paper and hid

"BURN MARK!" Roger yelled "SACRIFICE HIM TO THE FIRE GOD SO IT WILL SPARE US!"

"No guys!" Joanne yelled "Be calm and do what the paper says!"

"Mine says panic!" Roger told them as he started panicing

"Mine says Jump out the fire escape" Mimi told them as Angel grabbed her and stopped her

"I don't like Joanne's plan...." Angel said as she took a piece out "Mine says Blankets catch on fire"

"Mine says Don't...." Mark told them

"Mine says Hide" Collins said from under the sink "Oh yeah! I like this plan!"

"Mine says....Maureen remember to make copies" Maureen said as she got glared at

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Roger yelled "I'm running out of air! someone trade plan pieces with me! screw it I'm taking Mimi's plan piece" Roger yelled as he jumped out the fire escape with a loud thud

"It's getting hot in here!" Mark yelled "I think our floor is going to burst into flames!"

"What do we do?" Angel asked

"TAKE THE ELEVATOR!" Collins yelled as he came out from hiding under the sink

"You fucking idiot!" Angel yelled "You should never take the elevator in case of a fire or emergency! you take the stairs! Plus it's not like we have an elevator in here anyway!"

"No way!" Collins yelled back "The elevator is quicker!"

"What if it breaks down?" Angel yelled back "Don't you ever see the signs next to the elevator with the stick man taking the stairs because the elevator is on fire?"

"What if the stairs are on fire too?" Collins yelled back "Then what the fuck do you do huh?"

"You burn Collins!" Angel yelled back "You burn to the ground!"

"Guys?" Benny asked as he walked in "What the hell are you doing? I've gotten complaints about you! worst ones yet!"

"FIRE BENNY!" Maureen yelled "WERE ALL GOING TO BURN!"

"Maybe..." Benny told them "If you lived 3 buildings over.....That building is on fire NOT this one"

"But I smelled smoke..." Mimi told him

"Yeah because of the fire 3 buildings over...." Benny told them "You guys are lucky it wasen't this building or you all really would have been dead"

"We did have a plan..." Joanne told him "It just went horribly wrong"

"Yeah I can see that...." Benny told them "Someone should go make sure Roger's okay.....he's laying on the ground screaming FIRE I THINK I BROKE MY LEG!"

"I'll go do that" Mimi said as she left

"I'll come too" Mark said as he followed her

"Take the elevator!" Collins yelled

"Stairs!" Angel yelled