An: Finally chappy! Holy crap. Feels good to finish the story. There will be a semi sequel where the tension between Sakura and them finally comes to a close (because I already started writing it before this was even finished) and random oneshots that I decide when I want to cheat on my other stories but it's finally done ish and I'm semi satisfied. The last chunk of chapter wasn't coming out and so I just tried to write the chapter again.
I was thinking of making this long and drawn out, and making it a few more chapters but every plot bunny evaporated and fell through and every time I tried to write what I was thinking about, it just wasn't coming out right. And so I decided enough was enough and that it was time to let Hinata and Sasuke win, but not without some complication.
This is an angst fic after all and their relationship would not be simple.
Music of the update: Beautiful disaster, Kelly Clarkson.
When Hinata had been younger, she had wandered off. She had started out a curious, precocious child. It was only later, after learning the cruelty of her world, that she had withdrawn become quiet and complacent. How such a thing was possible to become lost with a family full of Byakugan, Hinata would never understand. She had wandered with her toddler legs, as far as they would take her, enjoying the freedom whilst her family had been preoccupied with clan matters. But when the edge of freedom had worn off, and when it started to get cold and the sun was setting, it was replaced with an edge of terror.
The darkness of the forest had crept in on her and she had no earthly idea where she was. Everything was unfamiliar, piercing and sinister in the fading light. In a foreign place, away from the protective arms of her family, she began to wail, saline tears drenching her chubby pale cheeks. The sounds of terrible forest creatures had replied, ehcoed back, quieting the child as she huddled beneath a bush against the horrors unspoken and hoping that they would not come to investigate. She had cried silently then, whimpering on occasion when she could no longer hold the sounds in. The darkness had eyes and a voice. Hinata had been terrified of the sounds coming from the chilling forest. The feeling of being lost had never felt so real, so terrifyingly tangible to a three year old that she could still remember it, the memory seared into her mind. Simultaneously the feeling of being found had never felt so triumphant.
Neji had found her and brought the security of her father with him. That moment, when she had looked into her father's eyes and known, indefinitely that everything was alright, that she was safe. She was pulled into Hiashi's embrace, snuggled safe and warm and found in his arms. When questioned why she had travelled so far Hinata replied she'd seen the birds flying and wanted to be like one. To her surprise, however, as he took her back to the main house; they were still within the Hyuuga compound. The scary forest she had thought was a different land, the middle of unfamiliar territory, were the trees she played in during the daytime. It was the comfort of her own garden, cast in shadows so deep and dark they had looked different.
It was new and as old as time. And it was the same. Exactly the same, they were exactly the same, as he looked at her, breaking the kiss. Lost and found, familiar, and foreign, all at once within his gaze. Where Hinata was once terrified, afraid of the last Uchiha, she discovered that he was home, the very place she desired to be most and the familiar waves of comfort and warmth came to her, lapped over her head as she touched and tasted. He was hesitant, careful, as if afraid she would turn him away when it was she who had started the kiss. His hand delicately ghosted over her face, tucking her purple tresses behind her hair as he looked at her, really looked at her for the first time. His calloused thumb pad brushed the softness of her cheek, feeling the smoothness of her skin. Hinata's pearlescent gaze, like a deer in the headlights, was caught, and held by those charcoal grey eyes, eyes that searched her own. She had come to love his eyes; him, though she didn't fully understand that herself.
Sasuke drank in the look of her, luminous, pale and radiant in the fading light. She looked at him in return and he was pleased by what he saw in her eyes, or perhaps the lack of what he saw in her eyes. She wasn't afraid of his darkness, of him or his past. in fact she welcomed it, for his darkness echoed her light, beckoned to it, as a beacon, a lantern, an anchor. And the rays of her light didn't burn or sear him. They were cool, bringing relief and soothing comfort in the turbulent waters of his soul. She radiated warmth, and welcome. It was odd how being in her very presence quieted him, calmed him in a way he couldn't possibly understand.
Chapped lips met her soft ones, eager and curious as they explored the contours of them. Sasuke reveled in the feel of her, the taste. There was no rush, though the eagerness of them both wasn't surprising. He was learning her, savoring her taste, so he could remember it. The second kiss had started out mild, gentle even. It was simply two lips converging, delicately… and wonderfully against one another. Her lips treaded lightly upon his as they made contact and he felt the moistness touch his lips before he really registered the fact. Her hands wrapped around his neck as Sasuke begged entrance.
Her cheeks bloomed, pale pink becoming in the fading light. He paused, wondering if she was rejecting him. And then he felt her mouth open. His tongue met hers, and the kiss that was gentle, mild even, grew warmer, deeper, hotter, as the electric desire that coursed between the two became tastefully tangible. His musky scent of cinnamon and thunder surrounded her, enveloping her senses and she couldn't help but think of how much she loved the rain; loved that he smelled like it and the unique musky scent of man that was only his. Her lithe fingers buried themselves in the raven tresses of his spiky black hair as he brought her closer, needing the contact. Her calloused fingers scrubbing against his neck sent desirable tingles down his spine. He wanted those hands trailing his naked backside. He wanted to hear her calling his name as he took her to unexplored heights.
She could taste the desperation in his kiss, his neediness, and she gave, resonated as her hands roamed his chest, sensing his distress and offering herself. He placed her hands inside his white haori, her flesh touching his, eliciting a small hiss of need from him. Her touch was addicting and he craved her touch so desperately, fiercely even as his arms locked around her, pulling her body prone against his for more. He mimicked her own movements and she found that she liked the feel of those calloused hands touching her. The kiss grew, blooming as the hearts of the two lovers did, discovering what was already there within themselves.
His pale face was flushed with the heat of her and she found she liked that even more. Hinata was burning, being devoured by the charcoal eyes that smoldered her in their heated were beautiful and she could see her reflection in them, as her own pearls gleamed brighter, glowing in their intensity. Hinata was no longer satisified with reaching into his Haori. She wanted to see the expanse of his pale flesh. Her hands pulled the haori off of his shoulders, as her lips nibbled his earlobe, dragging a path of sweet pleasure and prolonged pain with those teeth to his collarbone where she laved at his skin. One hand rubbed tenuous circles in her hip, as the other fisted in her hair, returning the pleasurable tingles she had given him earlier.
He gasped as she nibbled at his jaw, unsure of whether to encourage her or stop it, could he stop this? The need to have her, to touch her and feel her inside out was growing as the space between them was disappearing. Hinata needed no encouraging, she pulled herself into his lap. Sasuke gasped, pulling her into another searing kiss as she slid exactly where she needed to be most. The muffled moan of his name on her lips was sweet tortured music to his ears. He wanted more. He wanted her. He wanted her to scream his name. To taint her and mark her and make her his. To bury himself so deep within her until their was no difference, no barrier between them separating them any longer. The need was growing, and he wasn't sure whether he could stop it, this, between them.
"Hinata" Sasuke panted, swallowing. If they continued down this path, much longer he wouldn't be able to control himself, to stop himself from the pleasure he so craved.
"Please" Hinata pleaded as her hands guided his own to her bathrobe.
Sasuke eyed her one last time, searching her face for any doubt any hesitation.
There was none evident in her flushed features. Kiss swollen lips were moistened by a smooth flick on her lovely tongue and Sasuke found himself entranced again.
"I'm sure" She replied with a nod. "I'm not afraid" She told him.
Sasuke, reassured though nervous lifted her, slipping his hands within the knot of her bathrobe as it fell to a tumble on the floor, off of her shoulders. Sharingan eyes took in every detail memorizing the creamy expanse of pale flesh with hungry eyes that threatened to swallow her whole. That was alright with Hinata. She would drown in those crimson orbs tonight. Sasuke lifted her, kissing her, as he guided her to the bedroom.
He awoke with a jolt, sweat trickling down his brow as he looked down. It was something warm and soft pressed ardently against him. Hinata. Panting, as he took in his surroundings, he realized his nakedness. Sharingan blazing to life once more, he took note of his lover, with his expert vision. She was lovely, endearing even as she breathed softly in and out, small pants of breathe making her chest rise and fall. She was laid out, nestled half on him. Memories of their lovemaking repeated themselves, searing in his mind as he felt his heart race just from the memory. She had cried his name over and over, and he realized his back was scratched and sore. She was joustled by his movement, and stirred briefly, but didn't awaken as she rolled over nestling in the covers. Sasuke raked a trembling hand through his messy sleep tousled bangs. What had he done?
The magnitude of his actions hit him full force as he rose from the bed, putting on his clothing quickly, efficiently. His panic rose, doubled, tripled as his breath caught and he almost choked. What was he doing? What had he been thinking? To simply be caught up in a moment of passion. He had just slept with Hinata, the fiancé of his dead friend, the mother of his best friend's unborn children. The head of the Hyuuga clan. She had responsibilities, things he could never hope to be a part of, things he would un doubtably interfere with. She was pure and beautiful, like the snow. And he had just tainted that.
Trembling as he finished with his hakama he looked back at her. They were from different worlds. She was light and happiness and he…he was…No. He couldn't. This wasn't- He couldn't do this. Gods he shouldn't have done this, her, loving her wasn't what he should have done. He raked another hand through his hair as he paced, tense all over as he panicked.
Sasuke wasn't a father, He wasn't father material. He wasn't the kind of man anyone should settle down with. His hands were tarnished with blood, stained with the metallic coppery tang he could never wash out. He didn't have the first idea of what it meant to be in a relationship and memories of his own disfunctional father and his fucked up relationship with his Mother washed over him. The disappointment, the hurt, the pain of never being good enough was still within him. She would look to him for strength and he would have none. She would look to him for nurturing and he would have none. Sasuke was a sinking ship, and if he stayed with her, Hinata would go down with him. Her disappointment would surely follow when she realized he couldn't be what she needed. He couldn't bear her being disappointed in him. Couldn't bear her rejection. This wasn't going to work, he thought with the panic spurring him on. In what world could he ever hope to be what Naruto's son would need?
Sasuke's Sharingan whirled, flighty as he picked up his katana with trembling hands, eying the slumbering woman memorizing her face.
It's better this way….he told her silently.
For to reject her, first, meant that she couldn't reject him.
"I'm sorry" He whispered, mercilessly, as he left.
Hinata awoke to the chill of the wind. Pearlescent eyes glanced around her. Sasuke? The bed was tousled, from his form. She could still smell him on her skin, on the covers and the pillows and sheets around her. She blinked, stretching as she turned to face where he had fallen asleep. From the evidence it was clear that he had kicked off the covers. She wondered where he went. Hinata blinked away the last vestiges of sleep as she shuffled around on the bed. His bed was comfortable she thought with a blush as she recalled the things they had done on that bed. If beds could talk what stories they would tell she thought with a small smile.
She pulled the covers around her, draping them over her naked body, covering herself adequately as she looked around. His clothes weren't on the floor. Alarmed she looked around. The shouji door was ajar. That was why she had woken up, because it was cold. The wind was howling outside. Hinata gasped. The painful tang of bile surged. Hinata covered her mouth, sinking to the floor as she waited for the nausea to subside.
No. Sasuke wouldn't have left her. He was not that type of person. She was being paranoid. She forced a smile to her face as she shakily got up. She was being silly. He was probably around. Perhaps training as most of the men in Konoha did at random hours of the evening and morning. It was a grey morning, the dark clouds threatening to storm at any minute. She closed the shouji door, leaning against it fro strength. The door could have been opened up by the howling wind outside. It was rough enough to. Content in her belief, Hinata steadily and carefully rose to her feet from her crouched position by the shouji door.
She smiled. Maybe he was in the kitchen making her food. Maybe he'd gone to get food. She didn't think he knew how to cook, after all. Maybe he'd gone to get flowers or was going to surprise her with something. She blushed at the thought. Perhaps that was a bit too ambitious of her to hope for. She padded down the hall in the blanket and then realized that she was completely naked. Should anyone come, it might compromise his position. Deciding to bathe, get herself clean and then change into clothes that she could find Hinata made her way to the furo. Sasuke would come back and she would be clean and presentable for him. She smiled as put her hair up and out of her way.
Sasuke was near the border when he sensed them. Impossible. Blinking, whirling Sharingan gazed in disbelief at the three figures standing before him.
"Yo!" Suigetsu's shark like grin greeted him as he heaved his sword over his shoulder with a smirk.
"Have a nice vacation in fire country?" He asked. Sasuke stood, blinking as he tried to fathom the event unfolding before him. Team Hebi…his team stood before him.
"Sasuke Kun!" Karin cried launching herself into his arms.
Her tears were hot as she clutched him with a grip that refused to let go. Both were surprised that he allowed her the contact but he couldn't do anything about it. He was frozen by the contact, paralyzed by the touch of another. He did not turn her away, but neither did he make any move to touch her, to acknowledge her, or encourage her. It seemed Sasuke was in another world, unfocused and cloudy red eyes focused on the distance in front of him.
Juugo frowned. "Sasuke?" He asked.
Sasuke stood, feeling strange. The eerie feeling of De-ja-vu set in, but it was foreign. "Is this real?" he wondered, not realizing he'd said it outloud.
"Of course." Suigetsu replied. "You think it was easy to get in here? They got Konoha on lock down and shit"
"We came to get you. It took us some time to figure out how to infiltrate the border, but-"Juugo said.
"Nothing would stop us from getting to you. It took some time and calculating but…" Karin finished, wiping her tears away. "but how did you know we were coming for you?" She asked.
Sasuke didn't answer. He was disoriented. They were his team, his team that he had spent much of his adult time with. Why was it so foreign? He knew these people, had fought alongside them, shed blood together. They were comrades in arms. Why was it tense, awkward even.
"Oh..Stupid me, you must have felt our chakra signatures. How did you escape?" Karin asked.
It had been easy enough to leave. No one was really stopped from leaving Konoha under house arrest. He'd left the anbu he'd run across in the mangekyou genjutsu. He hadn't tortured them, just led them to believe that everything was as normal. His eye had bleed from the strain of that many. So easy to leave. Too easy to leave. It had always been too easy to leave he had thought. Pearlescent eyes, so trusting came to mind and Sasuke flinched the first wave of emotion that had crossed him since fleeing her presence. The thunder cracked, and lightning split the skies. The first few trickles of rain hit him and Sasuke looked at the water transfixed by the feel of moisture on his skin. The moisture of her skin, sliding against his, her sweat, his sweat mingling…A chill ran up his spine. He glanced behind him at the lush green forests and the desert ahead of him.
His breathe came out in shallow gasps, his heart racing at the turbulent thoughts in his head. It was masked by the sound of the rain. The rain began to pour, hard droplets pounding the dirt and grass beneath his feet creating puddles. The water soaked them as team hebi watched their leader transfixed and waiting for his reply, for some sort of acknowledgement. Sasuke used his forearm to wipe the water trailing down his face. The smell of lavender on his skin permeated, wafting from the water that drenched him. The lavender scent she had washed herself in, the lavender scent he had buried himself in as he had taken her. Sasuke flinched again, hesitated.
"We need to go" Suigetsu growled.
"Sasuke? Come on. They'll notice us" Karin said, frowning as she looked at the dark haired Uchiha, tugging on his hand insistently. Sasuke said nothing, didn't even acknowledge her as he looked down at his hands. She had intertwined their hands as he had made love to her….lover…….love….he loved her. Numb, transfixed as he stared at his empty hand, Sasuke was in shock.
"Sasuke?" Karin asked, as she released his hand.
Juugo eyed the Sharingan user as he stood there, unmoving. The rain fell down in sheets, the hard droplets pounding on his cloak as he watched. There was something different about the Sharingan bearer. He could taste it in the air, feel it in the way he looked. He was different, changed from the experience of returning to a home he had promised to never return to again. From returning to a people he had sworn himself against. Then again the lone Uchiha had sacrificed himself to allow for team hebi to escape from being captured by Konoha nin. He had insisted on protecting some corpse, refusing to leave it. He had distracted them and bought time for team Hebi to escape. Juugo had learned later that apparently the dead boy had been a former member of Sasuke's old team.
Sasuke was surrounded by the grey, the fog coming as the thunder crackled again. It was his eyes, Juugo thought suddenly. His eyes are no longer empty. He looks numb, lost. Suddenly Sasuke's fist clenched. Sharingan looked up to meet Juugo's eyes as if looking for permission. Juugo could only give him the slightest of nods. I understand he said silently. Sharingan whirled, hesitating. Then when Juugo blinked he was gone, vanished as if he had never been there.
Suigetsu balked, and Karin gasped looking around stammering as she called out desperately. Juugo only smiled.
"Let's go" He told them.
"Not without Sasuke" Karin yowled angrily as she stomped her foot. "Where the hell did he go? We can't leave him"
"He is not coming" Juugo replied. "He has some place to be"
"Shyea, did you smell the perfume off the guy, Sasuke got himself a-Ouch-" Suigetsu complained before getting a well deserved whack from Karin. Juugo only smiled and shook his head.
Goodbye my friend. He thought as team Hebi disappeared as quickly as they had come.
"He's not coming back, Hinata!" Neji called angrily. "Why can't you understand that! We have to report this to the Hokage!" He shouted, frustrated, furious.
"You're wrong" Hinata replied, empty pearlescent eyes focused on their task at hand.
"Stop living in a delusion" Neji snapped.
"Is that what you think? That I'm delusional?" Hinata snaped. Neji recoiled from her anger.
She finishing tying her hair in a braid and stalked out, away from Neji. She walked out the Uchiha shouji door and into the garden. The rain fell, but Hinata welcomed it. Anything was better than the aching gap in her heart right now that Neji was prying open.
"He left you, Hinata…he's gone… can't you see tha-" Neji started and then choked at the intruder.
"Leave" Sasuke ordered, Sharingan whirling, katana out. Neji stood surprised.
"Sasuke" Hinata whispered softly, but both of them could hear it. The longing, the disbelief in her voice. She trembled and fell to her knees, eyes downcast on the ground.
"Hinata" Both men were worried and stepped forward, eyes on the other.
"I'm fine." Hinata held up a warning hand, bowing her head as the rain fell on it, drenching her. "Just leave me be" She pleaded though to who that was directed to neither knew.
Sasuke flinched. Neji's eyes narrowed.
"Traitor" Neji snarled. Sasuke's eyes narrowed, eyes burning in their intensity as he regarded the Hyuuga Prodigy coldly.
"What did you call me?" He asked.
"I know that you left, Uchiha. Regardless of whether you are back now or not, it doesn't matter, for your actions have proven your treason, Traitor" Neji accused, his finger pointing at the Uchiha prodigy.
Sasuke's white hands gripped his katana as he imaged Neji's head sliding, falling from his neck, his kusanagi buried deep in his heart.
"You placed anbu under the mangekyou and disobeyed the pact made by the Hokage by leaving the Uchiha compound." Neji waited, waited for Sasuke to deny it.
Sasuke stood, unflinching from the words accused, thrown at him like shuriken.
"And you can be sure as the coming dawn that I will tell Hokage sama about it, if she doesn't already know. You won't walk away from this you traitorous-" Neji snarled.
"Nii sama…Stop it" Hinata ordered sharply, eyes hard as she met Neji's eyes.
Hinata's heart was in her eyes and it wasn't for him. The hurt in her face stung, chaffed him. He turned his head away from her, unable to bear that look in her eyes. The look that rejected him.
Sasuke stood, drenched, the water dripping off his katana as both of them stood. Only the sound of water and Hinata's sharp intake of breath could be heard.
"Go. Tell the Hokage. Do whatever you wish… outside of my property, Hyuuga" Sasuke snarled.
Neji vanished in ninja smoke. Sasuke winced on his words. Hyuuga. He sighed. Hinata was working on the garden, plucking weeds. He realized with a start that she was wearing one of his haori with the Uchiha symbol on the back and a pair of his hakama. Sasuke sheathed his katana. Her long hair wall pulled back into a messy braid.
"Hinata?" He asked. She didn't turn, didn't acknowledge him, and didn't stop plucking weeds from the garden.
"Hinata" He asked again, kneeling beside her. Again she had no response. So he lashed out, grabbed her hand in his pulling her. Sasuke hated to be ignored.
He squeezed her hand, imploring her to look at him. Please he begged Please… look at me. Talk to me. Hesitant pearls looked into his Sharingan.
"H-hello Sasuke. Okaeri nasai" She greeted a smile on her face though her eyes were thick with tears.
Those words broke him. Sasuke pulled her into his arms, cradling his head in her lap as he gripped her around the waist with a grip that simply refused to let go. She was his anchor, his life preserve and he couldn't do this again. He couldn't let go of her. If he did he would drown. They were the same.
"Tadaima" He whispered back, feeling tears of his own.
Life has only gotten more complicated for the two.Hinata spent her days with Sasuke, avoiding the overwhelming sense of despair from being removed as the head made her feel. She wasn't officially removed, but it didn't matter on paper. It mattered in the way they treated her, looked at her. Sasuke could sense her desperation intuitively and squeezed her, hugging her from his position in her lap. Hinata ran her hands through his spiky raven tresses as he lay on her lap, holding her with a death grip as she jokingly called it. The feel of him never wanting to let her go was reassuring, comforting even as she thought of it. He was like this with no one else, allowed no one else into his personal space but her. And he insisted that she touch him, be near him as often as he could manage it. It was touching, something she treasured deep down. It had been raining for the past three weeks, and Hinata had been out every day, fixing the garden. After all he could have a lovely garden if she got the land ready. Already they were making progress. Already her belly was showing, growing larger by the day.
"Marry me" He begged, muffled by her ninja pants as he still hugged her waist.
"W-what?" Hinata stammered, flushing a brilliant shade of red.
The rain poured down around them, soaking them both, but neither cared. They both loved the rain. Hinata blinked back her tears. Had-Did Sasuke just asked what she thought he had asked…?
"Sasuke?" She questioned, frowning as she bit her lip.
"Marry me, Hinata Hyuuga, so I never again have a reason to leave you. Please" He begged, insistent.
Hinata eyes were wide in shock. Her mind fizzled. She couldn't believe he had just…Sasuke looked into her eyes, terror apparent as she hadn't said anything yet.
Hinata looked down upon him and smiled, eyes glowing in luminous brilliance bringing a hand up to caress his face. Lacking the ability to speak any coherent thought, she did the only thing she could think of. She had always excelled at nonverbal communication, after all someone who didn't like to speak would rarely use words. And so Hinata nodded. And was rewarded with the most beautiful smile she would ever see.