Here's a new fanfic! YAY!

Summary: A space ship crash lands in the woods outside Deidara's house. He goes exploring and finds an injured alien. He takes him home and takes care of him. But what if he wakes up and decides Deidara would make a good mate? And what happens when alien beasts get loose and go on a rampage? Lots and lots of crap…

I can't do good summary's!! T_T

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto.


Alien Boyfriend

Deidara's head shot up from his homework when he heard a loud noise. He quickly rushed to the window. Outside, he could see light and smoke coming from the woods not far from his house. He glanced at the clock, which read 1:00 a.m., and decided to go check it out. He left his room, grabbed a coat from the chair in living room, slipped on his shoes and left the house.

After a short trudge through the woods, he came across a very large, smoking heap of metal and debris. Upon further inspection, he realized it was a space ship. Every nerve in his body screamed at him to turn and run, but, against better judgment, he located an entrance and wandered in.

Everything was slightly sideways because of the crash, so Deidara had to keep a hand against a wall to explore the craft. The entire ship seemed to be made of metal and there were several strange parts Deidara had never seen before. There were several tubes along the walls that were filled with some sort of bubbling liquid. The lights continually flickered, giving the silent hallway a very creepy feel.

There were several rooms along the long stretch of hall. They had those kinds of doors in the sci-fi movies that would slide open when you pushed a button. Deidara tried a few, but they seemed to be damaged from the crash. He came across one that was slightly open and peeked inside. There were many large tubes along the walls; each had a different alien species inside. The blonde shivered. This was way too freaky. The door refused to budge any further, so he continued along the hallway.

There was an archway at the end that entered into a large room. Judging from all of the buttons, levers, and various other foreign objects, it must have been the control room. It had apparently taken the most damage, as there was smoke rising from the control board and several things were broken and emitting sparks.

Deidara wondered around this room for several minutes, trying to make some kind of sense of the strange language that marked everything. Some of the buttons were glowing and flashing in various colors. He jumped slightly when a small section suddenly sparked viciously for about two seconds. He let out a sigh of relief and put a hand over his pounding heart. He let out a loud shriek and jumped back, however, when something behind him crashed. He sighed in relief again when he realized that a large, liquid filled tube had simply fallen over.

With the tube out of the way, he noticed something in the corner. It appeared to be a person. Deidara quickly but cautiously made his way over and knelt next to it. It was a person, or alien, with flaming red hair and pale skin. He carefully felt for a pulse, then reeled back when he felt how cold it was and how it seemed to be hard underneath the skin. He leaned forward a little to look at its face. It was almost definitely male. He listened closely, and realized it was breathing and had a heart beat. "Well... I suppose I can't simply leave you here, un..."

Deidara stood and looked around. The unconscious being was bigger than him, so he'd need to get a few supplies...

Ten minutes later, he had found a flat metal plate large enough to carry a person, and rope long enough that he could tie around his waist and to the plate. It took most of his strength to hail the alien onto the plate, and he couldn't believe what he saw when he managed it. There appeared to be blades folded up on its back, and its stomach area was replaced with a metal cable. There was a raised section where its heart should have been and that had the same weird writing on it as everything else.

Deidara sighed. "You're lucky I care so much, un..."


3:00 a.m.

Deidara jumped when the thing suddenly sat up. It stared into space and Deidara stared at it. He finally got up the nerve to speak. "Uh... You're awake then?" He jumped a little when it jerked its head to look at him. He saw now that it's eyes where the same fiery red as its hair. "Uh..." He looked around the desk and found a bag of chips. He grabbed it and slowly approached the alert alien. "H-hungry?" He held it out to him. The red head simply stared. He handed him the bag. It continued to stare at it. "Um..." Deidara took the bag from him and opened it before handing it back.

Nothing.

Deidara sighed and stuck his hand in the bag, pulling out a chip and eating it. "See? They're good, un." The red head frowned and tossed the bag on the other side of the bed. "Hey! I hafta clean that!" Deidara huffed. He went to the other side and began picking up chips. Once that was done, he threw the entire bag away.

Deidara turned back to the bed to see the alien staring at him with what seemed like a creepy sort of fascination. He groaned. He was too tired to deal with this crap. "Oh, fuck it." He silently thanked whatever deity he could think of that he had a queen sized bed. He laid down on his side of the bed and pulled the covers over his head, not even caring if the thing sitting only feet away killed him in his sleep. He greatly relaxed, however, when he felt it lie down and pull the covers up slightly. It was only minutes before he went to sleep.


The entire weekend was mostly calm. Deidara stayed in his room for the most part to make sure the alien didn't break something, and only ventured out to get food for himself since the other had yet to eat a single thing he'd offered.

Deidara sighed softly as he finally finished his essay. He really hated English sometimes. The clock read a little after eight as he carefully climbed in bed next to the alien. He vaguely wondered what he was going to do with it tomorrow since he wouldn't be here to watch it all afternoon. He shrugged it off and closed his eyes, soon slipping into blissful unawareness.


Deidara groaned as he began coming back to reality. He opened his eyes and saw wall. Good, he was still in his room. He immediately tensed when he realized something was lying against him, with its arm on his hip and something cold and metal wrapped around his waist. He tried to get away, but the arms moved to his chest and pulled him back. He couldn't scream, it would wake his parents, so he began struggling violently.

Eventually, it released him, and he fell to the floor. He quickly crawled to the other side of the room and grabbed a bat that was sitting in a corner. He stood, aiming it at the bed, when the thing sat up. It looked at him and quirked an eyebrow, as if saying, "What are you, fucking stupid?"

They stared at one another for several minutes, Deidara slightly shaking as he held the bat. He dropped it in fear, however, when he heard his father call his name. He quickly went to the bed and grabbed its arm, tugging it in an effort to get it out of the bed. It didn't even budge. "Come on, un! We can't let my dad see you!" He tugged with all his might, but the alien easily pulled its arm back to its side, bringing Deidara onto the bed on his stomach. It removed the covers and stood up, pulling Deidara with it. He stumbled a bit before standing and leading it to his closet. He quickly opened the folding doors and pushing it inside, closing them once it was in.

Not two seconds later, his father burst into the room. "Why the hell aren't you in school!?" He yelled. Deidara looked around and found a clock. 8:04 a.m. Deidara's jaw dropped. How the hell did that happen?? "I-I didn't mean-"

Before he could finish, his father was across the room and had slapped him hard across the face, making him fall to the floor. He tensed when he heard it growl and hoped that his father hadn't heard. He leaned against the doors, hoping that would help keep it inside. "I-I'm sorry, un. It won't happen again..."

"Damn right it won't!" His father turned and stomped out of the room. Deidara sighed in relief and crawled forward a few feet to let the alien out. He whimpered and began to cry lightly. He heard the closet door open and felt a presence sitting beside him, gently stroking his hair. He slapped the hand away and glared at the thing. "Like you care, un. You probably have no idea what's going on."

It quirked an eyebrow, making Deidara smirk. "You have no idea what I'm saying, do you? I could call you anything I want, and you'd have no idea, un. You'd just there with that stupid look on your face." Deidara snickered, "Are you lost, fire crotch?" With that, Deidara burst into laughter. He continued to laugh even as it leaned forward. "That's not funny."

Deidara yelped and fell over when it spoke in his ear. It smirked at Deidara's bewildered look. "Y-you can understand me?!?"

"Of course."

Deidara sat up and blushed. "S-sorry..." He looked at the ground.

"Hn... I'm Sasori."

"Deidara..."

"That's a nice name."

"Thanks, un."

"You'll make a good mate."

"Wha-?"

Deidara yelped when Sasori shoved him to the floor. He had to bite his lip to keep from screaming when Sasori bit down on the junction between his neck and shoulder. He dug his nails into the 'skin' on Sasori's shoulder when he felt the metal cable that was in his stomach slid inside his pants and enter him. He silently sobbed as it slid deeper and deeper. "S-stop!" He sobbed. Sasori moved one hand to massage the other side of Deidara's neck and the other hand rubbed his hip.

As quickly as it had begun, it was over. Sasori withdrew the cable and lightly kissed the wound on Deidara's neck. Deidara sobbed lightly. "W-what the hell was that?"

"You're my mate now."

"M-mate? MATE!?" Deidara attempted to sit up, but Sasori forced him back down. "The eggs haven't taken hold yet. They'll come out if you sit up."

"I'm pregnant?!"

"No, but I can get you pregnant now."

"What?!" He attempted to sit up again, but, like the first time, was pushed back down. "Don't. Move." Deidara immediately stopped all struggling. Something about the tone in Sasori's voice made him terrified.

Sasori stood and walked into Deidara's bathroom. Deidara could hear him open then close several cabinets, then it got silent.

Deidara relaxed slightly. Maybe this wouldn't be so bad? Apparently, he had a boyfriend now, and he wasn't actually pregnant... yet. That could be a problem later. On the positive side, he could learn a lot about other planets and whatnot. But, did he want to be in a relationship with an alien he had met two days earlier? He had only learned that he could speak his language half a minute ago. He sighed. 'I don't really know him, true, but he can't be all that bad, right? He's pretty hot… I don't think I get a choice anyway…'

Sasori reappeared with a wet rag and gently pressed it to the wounds on the blonde's neck. "What took you so long, un?"

"I couldn't figure out how to make your water system work."

Deidara couldn't hold back his laughter. The thought of the alien not knowing how to work the sink was simply hilarious.

Sasori leaned forward and pressed his cheek to Deidara's, a common affectionate gesture on his planet. Deidara sighed and returned the gesture.

Several minutes of comfortable and enjoyable silence later, Deidara finally worked up the nerve to speak again. "Sasori?"

"Hn?"

"What's your planet like?"

Sasori sat up and gazed down at the beautiful blonde underneath him. Indeed, Deidara was a god by his, and several other planet's, standards. He lightly caressed his cheek, and was pleased when Deidara nuzzled his hand. "My home planet is Suna. It's mostly dessert. Most of the major towns and cities are inside domes."

"What's that like, un?"

"Better than living outside in the heat. The temperature is 72 degrees all day, every day. Other than that, it's not much different."

"Cool..."

"Hn."

"Do they have war on your planet?"

Sasori chuckled slightly. "Earth is the only planet that fights within itself. The rest of us fight with other planets."

"Oh... Are there lots of other planets, un? I mean, with intelligent life on them?"

"A few hundred. Less than fifty are inhabited strictly by unintelligent life forms."

"Wow..."

"Hn."

"Sasori-Danna?" Sasori cocked his head. "Danna?"

"It means master or husband, un. It's a term we use here in Japan."

"Hn."

"Danna? Why are you here?"

"I've been sent to collect as many different life forms as possible for study."

Deidara stiffened. Sasori noticed this and gently ran his thumb over the blonde's beautiful, full lips. "Don't worry, koi, I'm not here to hurt you or your species. I meant collect the less intelligent species that are here." Deidara blushed at the affection. "Like the things on your ship, un?"

"Yeah..." Sasori's eyes widened. "Where's my ship?"

"In the woods. I can take you there. Is it okay to sit up, un?" Sasori nodded and helped the blonde to his feet.


Fear Sasori's OOCness!! MUHAHAHAHAHA!! I know it seems like I've gotten them together really quick, but Deidara's not actually "in love" with Sasori yet and Sasori's not actually "in love" with Deidara, he's just physically attracted to him. Review please?