Title: Matchmaking for Dummies

Disclaimer: House and Wilson don't belong to me because they belong to each other! This fic also has nothing to do with the "…for Dummies" series of books, I just wanted to use it as a title.

Summary: Cuddy hatches a plan to bring House and Wilson together.

A/N: The entire fic is told from Cuddy's point of view.

Any comments or reviews will be gratefully received. Thanks!


Chapter 1: Revelation

I've lost count of the number of times I've glanced at the clock on my desk. Even though it is Friday afternoon, time is going at an excruciatingly slow pace. Reading through a research grant proposal makes each minute pass with glacial speed. Instead of actually studying the proposal, I debate whether to take it home with me to finish reading it there tonight or come into work tomorrow for a few hours.

My procrastination is fantastically cut short when I look up to see Wilson rushing into my office, his white coat flying behind him like Superman's cape. He does his hands on hips pose and I'm actually looking forward to whatever crisis has just unfolded.

"I love House!" Wilson exclaims breathlessly. His face is bright red from either running to my office or he is in fact highly embarrassed about the confession. I try not to roll my eyes. Of course he loves House. It would be strange if he didn't after all they've been through together. Wilson seems to be annoyed by my lack of a suitable reaction.

"I'm in love with House!" He amends, speaking slowly as if I don't understand English. He shakes his head in disbelief. This time I am surprised, not that he is in love with House, but because it has taken him so long to realise that fact. I stop myself from asking for all the juicy details. I don't think he'd appreciate my insensitivity at the moment. I stand up and walk over to him, indescribably glad to be freed from the torture that is the grant proposal from hell.

"Let's go get some coffee." I gently suggest. Wilson looks like he needs something much stronger than coffee, but neither of us can leave the hospital to get blind drunk at the nearest bar, so the cafeteria will have to do.

Wilson sits down at a corner table and keeps his gaze fixed on the exit. I think he's waiting for House to make an appearance. It is amazing sometimes how House can magically turn up at the mere mention of his name. I can only assume he's bugged all of Wilson's ties. House is more than capable of doing something like that.

I get the coffees and join Wilson. He has his head in his hands and seems completely miserable. He's seen what happens when you fall in love with House. It never ends well.

"So when did you realise?" I ask softly.

"Today. This afternoon." He chuckles morosely. "We were killing time trying to work out who knew the worst joke." Wilson looks up and remembering that I am his boss, quickly adds, "I was between appointments and House was waiting for test results."

"And then?" I prompt, trying not to sound too impatient.

"I told him a dumb joke, you know the kind that are so bad they're funny? Anyway House laughed." Wilson smiled at the memory and then sat back in his seat as if that was a perfectly reasonable explanation for his epiphany.

"But you two always act like teenagers when you're around each other. Why was it different this time?" I enquire, even though I do know falling in love sometimes doesn't make sense. The tiniest, simplest moment that seems silly or insignificant can become revelatory.

"I can't remember the last time he smiled at me like that. It made me feel really good." Wilson whispers as he glances around the cafeteria.

"So what are you going to do?" There is no point dancing around the issue and I can tell Wilson needs a push in the right direction.

"What?" He stares at me in confusion and this time I do roll my eyes.

"When are you going to tell House?" I continue.

"No way!" He yelps and practically jumps out of the chair. "I'm not going to tell him anything."

"You can't hide this from him forever." House is not a stupid man. He can sense the smallest change in Wilson's mood and he'll find out what Wilson is hiding from him in record time.

"He'll freak out or he'll mock me for it for the rest of my life. I don't exactly think either outcome will be good for me." Wilson looks depressed all over again.

Unrequited love is no fun at all. I reach over and pat Wilson's hand in sympathy. I then have the image in my head of House finding us here and ordering me to get my hands off Wilson as I'll never be his fourth wife. House's jealousy is a funny thing where Wilson is concerned.

Suddenly an idea forms in my mind. It is so simple, ridiculous even, but that is why it'll work.

"It'll be okay, I promise." For once they're not just empty words. All I need to do is spend time with Wilson and House will jump to the wrong conclusion and with a little push from me, hopefully he will examine his own feelings in the process.

tbc