AN+Disclaimer: This idea came to me when I was under the shower, so take that SM , that's way cooler than in a dream. Don't know if it's going to work out, but it's something I had to write. But anyway I don't own Twilight and all its characters belong to the talented Stephenie Meyer.
Chapter 1: Changes
For the past forty years I had lived in a wonderful bliss, I married the man I loved and got a beautiful child, Renesmee. But more importantly I knew that our wedding vows were special, after all, who could say that they really got forever? I never came to regret the decision I made when I married Edward; not even for a second. If I was to do it over again, I would give up my mortality in a heart beat. The first decade of our marriage, we really got to know each other. we knew each others desires, hopes, dreams and thoughts, without the need of Edward's special ability. After a decade I finally decided that Edward wasn't going to make fun of my thoughts, though he often found them strange, and let him in my head all the time. That was until a couple of months ago; Edward started to behave differently around me, but he wouldn't tell me what was going on. So I blocked my thoughts from him, as punishment. I thought it would drive him crazy and he would finally tell me what was bothering him; but it didn't. Even Renesmee noted that something was wrong and she confronted me about it. "Mom, why are you and dad acting funny?" she asked me. I smiled at her and touched her check. "I wish I knew, honey. I'm sorry I don't know what's wrong with daddy." I told her honestly, I knew that lying to her wouldn't do any good, and she would blame me for it. She touched my arm and let me see a memory she had of Edward and me having fun in 'our' meadow, kissing, hugging and joking around. I smiled at the memory, but suddenly it changed and I saw how we became more distant to one another, and I started to understand her worry. I put my arms around her, told her to go worry about her own marriage, and that I was perfectly capable of taking care of myself. "But mom, what if it's too late?" I smiled a genuine smile at her. " Darling, if you truly love each other, it's never too late." She left but she got me thinking. What was wrong with me and Edward? My feelings for him didn't change, they only got stronger through time. But what if this wasn't the case for Edward? What if he got sick of me? I decided not to let things take their natural course, but talk to him about it. soon. Just not today.
The following weeks I noticed that Edward did indeed behave oddly, but so did Alice. So when they went on a hunting together I went to see Jasper. Now that my blood wasn't tempting him anymore, it turned out that Jasper was a really good friend. In the last forty years he slowly but surely became my best friend in the whole world. He didn't control my emotions and therefore I granted him a side of him, I never showed anyone, not even Edward. When Jasper had asked me about it I told him that I was saving it for the moment forever seemed to be too long. Anyways when I knocked on his door, he immediately opened. "Hey Bells, I could feel your rollercoaster emotions all the way up here, so what's up?" he stared at me and I couldn't help but tell him the truth, instead of the initial small talk I had in mind. "Well, I was just wondering, don't you think Alice and Edward behave oddly lately?" I shrugged my shoulders as if it wasn't a big deal, but it was, and he knew it. You can't lie about your feelings and concerns with an empathy as best friend. "Well, yeah, but I thought it was just Alice, she's hiding all her emotions around me now, like she's always numb, I don't know how she does it, and I don't know what to make of it." He put his hand in his hair like he always does when he's worried. "I'm sure it's nothing." I said trying more to reassure myself than him. But I was worried; I felt anxious like tonight was going to be the night it was all going to explode, in my face that is.
That night when Alice and Edward returned I was waiting, I let my guard down and thought "we need to talk, in private. Meet me at the meadow." Edward nodded once, showing he got the message loud and clearly. So I took off to our meadow and seconds later Edward appeared there as well. "So what do you want to talk about?" Edward tried sound casual, but I knew him better than that, he was tense. "Are you going to tell me what's wrong with you, or do I have to pull it from you?" I asked sounding a bit more sharp than I intended. He sighed and sat down petting the grass to indicate I should go sit next to him. I decided to keep standing, which caused him to shrug and start his story anyway "Forever is a long time."
And that was all I needed to know, he was having an affair with Alice. It all made sense now, why they were both behaving funny. Alice not bugging me to go shopping with her, and the total lack of a sex life for me and Edward, it even explained why jasper was worried. I felt the need to start crying, and for the first time since I became a vampire, I was grateful I couldn't. So when I asked him to continue I knew what he was going to say but it still came as a shock to me. He stared at me with an apologetic look in his eyes. "The life span for a normal human marriage is about forty years. And we have been married for forty years."
I nodded. "and your point is?"
"Well I think that our forever is over now."
I was in shocked "Why?" was all I managed to get out, not willing to accept the think I already knew.
"well Bella, you are the mother of my child" Edward said "and I will always be grateful for that. but if I had to do it all over again, I wouldn't have married you. It's unnatural to promise someone forever, when you know it will literary be forever. And my feelings have changed, I'm not in love with you anymore, I'm in love with someone else--"
I interrupted him. "You're in love with Alice, so now what, you're going to leave me?" he nodded. "Alice and I are going to Australia, we are going to give you and jasper and the family the time to heal, and when a decade or so are passed I hope you and Jasper will find it in your heart to forgive us, and realize, that love can't be understood. That maybe then we can be a family again." He pause for a minute looking at me when I went to sit on the ground. "I'm sorry Bella, I know I promised to never leave you again." I nodded , feeling numb. He was leaving me again, but I wasn't going to allow him to do the leaving this time; they needed to stay with the family. They needed them more than they needed me, even though they'd never admit that. I knew I would leave, and if Jasper wanted to, I would leave with him.
When I looked up to tell Edward that he was already gone, so I stood up and ran to the house as fast as I could, I stopped Edward and Alice as they were loading boxes into the car. "You don't get to leave this time." I told them. "I'm going to leave."
Alice stared at me in shock, apparently her vision weren't so clear anymore. "I'm sorry Bella. But you're a Cullen now, and we are the ones that are tearing our family apart, you deserve to be with the rest of the family."
I shook my head furiously. "No! Alice you two don't get to leave. I love this family to death, but it will be my death if I stayed. I know they will never admit it, but they will blame me for tearing this family apart. Not in the beginning, but time will fade, and they will forget why you left. You belonged to them, long before I did! I made up my mind, and once I made up my mind I'm not going to change it. So either way I'm leaving, and I don't care whether or not you stay. " I took a deep breath to calm myself down "and seeing that there isn't a use for us all to leave, I suggest that you stay."
"Bella…" Edward began, I lowered my shield "Don't Edward, you've done enough damage."
I walked over to them and kissed both of them on the cheek. "I love you two, but I can't be around you or anyone who likes you right now, even though in their eyes you did something wrong as well; they love you, and right now I hate you."
I held my head high and walked to Jasper's room, I sighed deep to put my emotions in check and opened the door without knocking. I was shocked to find Jasper dry sobbing on the bed, I've never seen him sobbing before. I went to sit next to him and pulled him into my arms." It's going to be okay baby. I'm here, let it all out." I said rubbing circles on his back. He responded by pulling me even closer; like letting go of me would mean the end of the world, and right now it probably felt that way to him. We needed each other now more than ever. "Jazz, honey, I'm going to leave." His head shot up, his eyes widened and he shook his head in disbelieve. "You're what?" "I'm going to leave, I'm the one that does the leaving this time, I don't grant him that satisfaction, again." I took a sharp intake of breath uncertain if Jazz wanted to come with me but I needed to ask "I want you to come with me, do you want to?"
"But Carlisle, Esmee, even Emmet and Rose?"
"They will understand, besides they will eventually forget why Edward and Alice left and hate us for tearing up their family."
Jasper nodded in agreement
"So what do you say Mr Whitlock, do you want to come with me?"
He looked scared "but what if I am not strong enough, what if I drink human blood again?"
I stared into his golden eyes, amazed that he was so scared, I paused for a moment, thinking what I could say to him to make him feel better. "I don't know, what I would do without a support system either, Jazz. The only reason I became a vegetarian is because of you guys."
"But you never drunk human blood." He argued
"I did, remember, when I was pregnant with Nessie."
" that doesn't count."
"All right, so my record is clean, but I've had a support system from the start, and you didn't. I want to know if I can keep to this life style when I don't have a support system to fall back on, don't you? Don't you want to know, that you can do it on your own? Please Jazz , I'm leaving anyway, but I want my best friend with me; so what do you say?"
He nodded. "You're right, besides when you put it like that, how could I resist?" he chuckled before adding "So miss, Swan, where are we going?"
AN: I really like to know what you think, whether or not I should continue this story, if there's a problem with my grammar and please tell me, because it's so annoying to read fan fiction, with mistakes in it. anyways I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter as much as I loved writing it.