A/N: Okay, so this is my first fanfic, so please forgive any mistakes or mess-ups. And trust me, there will be a few. I hope you enjoy my story. I'm sure there are millions others out there like it, but I haven't read any of them, so if it seems like I'm biting your ideas, I'm sorry. I guess we just think alike.
Sadly, I do not own Twilight. Or Edward Cullen. *tear*
Rated T for drugs, some language, and newbie paranoia.
Are You High?
He wouldn't. Not even Emmett could be this stupid. He'd been known to do some really dumb things in the past (myself or Jasper in attendance half of the time) but this-this was insanity.
Edward was going to kill him
Thank the heavens that Edward had been gone to pick up Bella from work when I'd had my vision. I swear, I wouldn't have been able to block my mind, and if Edward had seen this-yikes. It was hilarious, but…..well, I just wouldn't want to be Emmett just then. If he'd seen, Edward would be halfway to Seattle by now, waiting to jump into the middle of the highway and crash Emmett' precious Jeep, Em and Rose still inside, just to stop them from getting home.
Well, I couldn't let that happen, now could I? Oh, no, this was far too good. I would have to help. I pulled out my cell phone, dialing Emmett's number quickly. Edward and Bella would be back soon, and little Eddy overhearing…….well, that just wouldn't do. He picked up before the second ring was finished.
"Alice," he said. Emmett managed to sound resigned and wary while still exuding excitement over the phone.
"It's not going to work." I was sure the second he walked in (maybe before, since he can't seem to shut up, even in his head), Edward would be up and running, Emmett's precious new stash clutched in his hands. He'd either burn it (which would yield the same result, good luck with that), or flush it. I didn't need my gift for this. I knew Edward well enough to know what he would do. The boy was so predictable. Either way, after he disposed of any and all illegal substances, he would flip, and beat the living (or non-living) shit out of Emmett. Maybe me too, for holding out. Whatever, he could try. I'd win-I always win.
I told him all of this in less than 3 seconds, speaking at vampire speed so fast that a human would have missed it entirely. I was getting edgy. I had maybe 30 seconds until Edward was within hearing distance, mental or otherwise. And if he heard, there would be hell to pay. God, this was going to be great.
"You can't just burst in with it, Em. He'll freak and like, throw you through a window or something. No, you'll be fine, but Esme'll be pissed. Yeah, so you'd better bring it on slowly, not all at once, okay, you maniac? Also, making sure that Bella's nearby when you break the news can't hurt. Overprotective freak. Oh, crap, here they come. I got to go. And listen to me!!!"
Emmett gave a skeptical, non-committal grunt and hung up just as I heard Edward's Volvo pull into the drive. Perfect timing, as always. I quickly busied my mind singing hymns in French.
Behind the music, I was wondering about Emmett's reaction to my warning. He was just refusing to listen to me. His future hadn't changed when I'd called him like it normally would, though it was fading. Slowly. I could only hope that Rosalie was trying to convince him to listen to reason. I couldn't understand why he was so set on doing this. Edward was going to rip his head off, and really, it's not like he'd never been around any, in his human life. It's not like this was a new thing. And really, what were the chances that this was going to work anyway? Honestly.
I couldn't see if his plan would work or not, because he hadn't planned that far ahead yet. The chances were probably one in a trillion, if he was lucky. If I were a betting woman, I'd be in heaven. Hmmm, maybe I could pass it on to Jasper.
I wonder if Emmett even cared that this could kill Bella……
I immediately heard a car door slam, and I could hear Edward gnashing his teeth before he was even through the front door. Frick! I quickly jumped back into translating Frère Jacques into Japanese, and sat down.
Edward opened the door, clutching a baffled-looking Bella to his side, and rose his eyebrows at me. I just rolled my eyes and picked up a bottle of Fire Engine Red nail polish from the coffee table, and Begot to work. Here come the glares, I thought.
Three, two, one….. I glanced up and, ah-ha! There it is! God, Edward was so predictable I didn't even need my powers with him.
"Hey, Alice," Bella said uncertainly. She threw another worried glance at Edward and skipped over to sit next to me. I smiled reassuringly and gave her a peck on the check.
Edward sighed and sat down as well, pulling Bella against his chest. I took another quick look at him; he was still staring at me, but he didn't look angry anymore. Confused, wary, a bit shaken from my "kill Bella" thought earlier, but not angry. Hmmm, interesting. I wonder what he thought I was hiding. I raised my eyebrows at him, and he opened his mouth to speak-
And then we both froze, the sound of four monumental ties-Emmett's Jeep-tuning onto the dirt road making us both tense up like we were preparing for impact.
I threw a frantic look at Edward. He looked confused and angry again. What had Emmett given away? Bella just looked doubly confused.
Then, quick as lightning, I heard a feral, deadly snarl rip from Edward's chest. Bella jumped, looking terrified, and my head snapped back to look at my brother. His hands were clenched into fists, his knuckles white, his jaw taut as his chest rumbled. He was livid. 'Damn you Emmett. Now he knows.'
The Jeep pulled to a stop out front, and Edward pushed Bella away from him, back onto the couch. "Stay here," he said to her, staring daggers at me as he stood up.
Bella glanced at me and I rolled my eyes, shaking my head. She relaxed visibly. 'See, Edward?' I thought at him. 'Bella trusts me.' He just growled.
Emmett and Rosalie walked in then, and a whole new version of events popped into my head. I burst out laughing, quickly closing my mind before Edward could get more than a glimpse of the very near, and very entertaining, future.
I smiled at Emmett, still giggling.
Let the games begin.