Yeaaaa, new chapter! (Refuses to comment on the lateness). I must tell you I won't be updating for a while, I'll most likely update around July at the earliest (that includes all other stories too) :( but I'm sure you're all used to waiting anyway. Thanks for the reviews, especially Ravinsong who reviewed LOTS. I love you all!

"Woohoo! School is over! I'm FREE!"

"I can't wait to get the hell away from this place. I think I'm going to go outside and try and erase the last couple of hours of my life." England complained. The corridor was filled with the chatter of students celebrating the end of last lesson. The school intercom suddenly turned itself on and everyone could hear Hungary's voice coming out of it.

A message to all students. Denmark has just informed me that his axe has been stolen. At present we have no idea who did it but as a precautionary measure we ask all students to remain in their rooms until the dangerous weapon is found. Thank you.

"What! No way, just as soon as were free we're stuck again? That sucks!"

"Oh god, I really don't want to be stuck in a room alone with France."

"Oh don't worry about France. He's already agreed to stay with us." America and England both froze when they recognised Belarus's chilling voice. They turned around to find her and Ukraine standing together. She had a variety of twigs in her hair and her dress was ripped down the side. At first she had gone deep into the woods far away from the school, agreeing with her brothers wishes, but had found that she couldn't stay away from him for so long and tried to come back. She would risk her brother's cold and help him through his time of need! Unfortunately on her way back to the school she was attacked by a bear, but she managed to wrestle it to the ground and strangle it to death and get back to find beloved brother.

"Really?" England didn't believe France would willingly share a room with Belarus.

"Yes. Don't you remember, after Japan attacked him we offered to look after him. And we will. I need France's information on Russia, because I know a year ago they had to do a biology project together. Not to mention, apparently France knows about romance and I NEED brother to LOVE me. So I will ask for his advice in wooing."

"He's all yours!" England said ecstatically. France walked over to the group.

"What's going on here?"

"You're rooming with Belarus! Have fun!" he shoved France into Belarus's arms.

"What!?" he yelled as she started dragging him to her room by his collar.

"Come, we must talk about Russia, yes?" she gave everyone one final glare before disappearing off around the corridor.

"Excellent! I'm going to go read in my, now alone, room! See you la..." England cut himself off when he caught sight of Japan looking lost and confused outside the classroom door, reading the rooming arrangements.

"Umm... Are you okay?"

"I'm... not on this list."

"Really?" he grabbed the list and examined it, "It's probably a misprint. They must have forgotten you."

"So where do I stay?"

"I don't know. Probably with China and Korea." England tried to take back his words as he saw the panic cross Japans face.

"But...but... I can't live with them! China will smother me and Korea will... do things I'd rather not think about!"

"Oh. Well... you could always; I don't know... possibly, but only if you want to! You could... stay with... me?"

"Really, England-kun?"

"But only if you want!"

"Yes, I would love to sleep with you. I.. I... mean... Not like that!" He blushed deep red at his wrong use of words.

"Oh no, of course not! I understand... Err..." both of them shared an awkward silence after their extremely awkward conversation. England looked around and noticed everyone had gone to their room, including America.

"We should go."

"Yes. Let's."

Canada and America sat on the floor of their room, playing snap. At first both had waited for their new roommate, Russia, to barge in, but they had long since given up on waiting as it was obvious he wasn't coming.


"You win again; you are truly the master of snap. God, this is so boring!"

"Well we can only wait till that axe is found, eh? Now let's play again."

"I have a better idea. Guess what I have!" America pulled out England phone from his pocket.

"Oh, I forgot about that! Let prank call someone!"

"Yeah! Let's see who's on his list." America scrolled though the list of names.

"How about we just text 'I want you' to everyone."

"Not only are you the master of snap but you are the master of evil, Canada. I knew we were related somehow!"

France wasn't quite sure whether or not he was terrified or overjoyed. It wasn't everyday he stayed in the same room as two gorgeous women, but then again it wasn't everyday he was tied to a chair with a knife to his throat.

"Tell me about Russia! What does he like?!"

"I don't know what he likes! Vodka? Sunflowers? Mass murder?"

"If you don't tell me something useful I will kill you."

"OKAY, OKAY! Umm... soyou want Russia to love you? Have you ever considered being less intense."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, mon cheri~ you may find this hard to believe but forcing yourself upon a person is not always the best way to go about things. Especially when it involves knifes."

"Are you saying I should get something better? Like a gun? Or maybe a bazooka! Yes, he will never be able to deny me if I have a bazooka!"

"No, not exactly."

"Then what are you suggesting?!"

"I'm suggesting that, you are a very beautiful woman and I'm sure your dear brother would probably be head over hills in amour with if you just... didn't act so scary."

"Scary? I'M NOT SCARY!" she screamed brandishing her knife at his chest.

"Okay! You're not scary! You're not scary! Just don't stab me!"

"Sister... ah, I hate to butt in but you are... a little bit scary sometimes." Ukraine stuttered.

"Am I? Am I really? Is this why brother doesn't like me? Because I scare him?"

"Oui, But do not fear, for I am the master of love and I can solve all of your problems! I can teach you how to be as sweet as candy! As long as you put the knife down." Belarus glared from Ukraine to France to her knife. Slowly and with what looked like excruciating pain she placed the knife on the table next to her.

"Good, good. You're doing well. Now step away from it." She did as instructed, "Could you now untie me?"

"No. You'll try to escape me!"

"I promise you I won't. A Gentleman like me would never leave a damsel in distress to fend for herself in the woes of love! If I try to escape, I give you full permission to grab that knife and do whatever you wish to me."

"Fine." as she untied the ropes, France sprung up from his seat.

"Let's get started then! Oh wait, I've got a message on my phone."

"Well, I actually don't know who to choose." Hungary said, staring at Turkey and Greece, "You were both absolutely terrible and I feel like firing you both. But, I'm sure you're both aware that Spain was fired and that asshole Austria has unfortunately taken his place. This means that he won't be taking one of your jobs so your both safe."

"YES!" They both yelled in unison.

"I'm right here you know." Austria said scathingly.

"I know." She responded.

"It's very unbecoming of a lady like you to be so rude and vulgar."

"I'll have you know I'm a fair maiden, and can be as rude as I like."

"Pfft, hardly."

"Excuse me, what are you insinuating?"

"I'm just saying, you're the furthest from a fair maiden I have ever seen."

"Shut up or I'll wack you in the face with my frying pan."

"So does that mean that we all go back to teaching lessons?" Liechtenstein asked, her arm in a sling from the chocolate incident earlier.

"Yes." Switzerland replied.

"So what are we going to do about the axe?"

"I guess the best we can do is try and find it. I suggest we split up into two's." Switzerland started separating everyone into groups. He put Greece and Turkey together, Hungary and Austria together and then placed himself next to Liechtenstein. "Let's go."

Romano slowly regained consciousness. The first thing he did was go to brush his hair out of his face, but found he couldn't because his arms were handcuffed above his head.

"Ah, you've woken up!" Russia giggled, sitting in a chair in the middle of the large room.

"Where am I?" he groaned, eyes circling around his surroundings. It appeared he was in a large empty hall, the brick walls caked with grime and the windows boarded up. The only light was coming from a flickering light strip above their heads.

"You're in an abandoned part of the school. It was shut down after it was deemed to unsafe for children. Don't worry though; the walls are thick enough so no one hears your screams."

"Don't worry?! Are you a fucking nutcase!"

"Maybe I am. Now, Estonia, hold the camera." Romano watched as Estonia and Latvia stepped out from behind Russia. Both had equally scared expressions on their face as Estonia took a handheld camera from Russia hands and aimed it at Romano.

"Where's Spain?"

"He passed out on the ground. Don't worry though, because I'll be giving him a video of you that i'm sure he'll love!"

"Stop telling me not to worry, Damn it!"

"Okay then. You should worry, because you've been a very bad boy and Latvia can tell you that all bad boys need to be punished. Tell him Latvia."

"B-bad boys n-need to b-be p-p-punished." He stuttered.

"Now, pass me that taser gun." He silently passed it over, shivering.


"What are you willing to do to stop me?"

"Anything! I'll do anything!"

"Kill Spain?"


"Wrong answer." He pulled the trigger


"That's the idea." Russia smiled, playing with the taser, "So here the deal I'm willing to make. And be thankful, because usually I just skip strait to the torturing. Iv'e been thinking and maybe I've been a little bit eccentric in wanting to kill Spain. I have a temper problem you see. Anyway, I realised what I really wanted wasn't the kill Spain, just to make him feel the pain I went through! You're not the person I'm mad at. Of course I am angry at you for stopping me, but you can be forgiven, da? Either way, he has to pay, how he pays depends on your decision. "

"W-what's the deal then?"

"Either I torture you, film it all and send the video to him so I can see his pretty little face cry. Or you break up with him, break his heart, and make him cry. Either way, I want him crying."

"But... If I break up with him he'll move away from the school and I'll never see him again!"

"Are you going with the torture option then?"

"I... No. I'll break up with him."

"Damn, I was hoping you would go with the other one. I got my camera out for nothing! Anyway, stay still." Russia knelt down to where Romano kneeling and pulled out a collar from his pocket.

"What's that?"

"It's a dog collar. It can electrocute you from a 20 mile radius with this button." Russia showed him a small box with a big red button on it. "I know it works because I tried it out on my dear friends. In fact I make sure they have their collars on at all times. I'm hoping I can force Lithuania to wear one too. Yours has a camera attached to it so I can make sure you're not going against our deal."

"So I just break up with him, is that it?"

"Make it as painful as possible."

"And if I don't?

"Well, if I don't think you're being insulting enough I'll electrocute you while you're doing the break up. Actually, maybe you'll need an earpiece too so I can tell you what to say. Hmmm, Latvia, go get me one of those."

"O-of c-c-course sir." Latvia came back holding a clip on earring. Russia picked it up and put it around Romano's ear.

"Excellent! Oh this is going to be so fun!"

Thanks for reading! I'm feeling a little low because of exams at the moment and I would love it if you reviewed :)