Set in New Moon, the day Bella jumped off the cliff. She is in the car with Jacob, but what would happen if Alice arrived a few minutes later? What would happen if Bella admitted her love for Jacob, instead of clinging to her memories for Edward?
And yes, the first part I took it from the book.
Disclaimer: I am not Stephenie Meyer, and I do not own any of these characters…unfortunately!
Jacob stopped the truck in front of my dark house, cutting the engine so it was suddenly silent. Like so many other times, he seemed to be in tune with my thoughts now. He threw his arm around me, crushing me against his chest, binding me to him. Again, this felt nice, even right. Almost like being a whole person again.
I thought he would be thinking of Harry, but then he spoke, and his tone was apologetic. "Sorry. I know you don't feel exactly the way I do, Bells. I swear I don't mind. I'm just so glad you're okay that I could sing – and that's something no one wants to hear." He laughed his throaty laugh in my ear.
My breathing kicked up a notch, sanding the walls of my throat. His words almost made me cry: he loved me and I kept hurting him, but he didn't mind. He was just glad I was okay.
Wouldn't Edward, indifferent as he might be, want me to be as happy as was possible under the circumstances? Wouldn't enough friendly emotion linger for him to want that much for me? I thought he would. He wouldn't begrudge me this: giving some of the love he didn't want to my friend Jacob. After all, it wasn't the same love at all. Was it? Actually, I wasn't so sure anymore…
Jake pressed his warm cheek against the top of my hair, distracting me from my thoughts.
If I turned my face to the side – if I pressed my lips against his bare shoulder… I knew without any doubt exactly what would follow. It would be very easy. There would be no need for explanations tonight.
But could I do it? Could I betray my absent heart to save my pathetic life?
Butterflies assaulted my stomach as I thought about turning my head.
And then, as clearly as if I were in immediate danger, Edward's velvet voice whispered in my ear.
"Be happy," he told me.
I froze. I was right: indifferent as he might be, Edward wouldn't mind me being happy.
Jacob felt me stiffen and released me automatically, reaching for the door.
Wait, I wanted to say. Just a minute. I was still locked in place, listening to the echo of Edward's voice in my head.
I loved him. I loved Edward and I would never forget him, but he was part of my past. Right here next to me was my present and my future: Jacob Black. He was the man I now loved, and who deserved my love more than anyone else in the world; he was the one that was there for me when I needed a friend, someone to talk to, a shoulder to cry on. He never let me down. In a second I found the courage to do something I should have done months ago.
"Wait!" it was barely a whisper, but he heard it and was now looking at me with a mixture of hope and curiosity.
He closed the door of the car and pulled me back in his arms, holding me against his chest.
"What's wrong Bells?" he was looking at me worriedly, trying to guess my thoughts, as I blushed.
Why did it have to be so difficult? I loved him right? Why couldn't I simply tell him? Oh, right. Silly, blushing Isabella Swan.
"Bella?" I sighted, getting ready to confess my love for my best friend.
"Jake, I… uhm…"
"Yes?" I opened my mouth again, staring at my hands, but my voice was gone.
He rolled his eyes and took my chin in his hand, forcing me to meet his gaze.
"Spit it out Bells!"
Ok Bella, you can do this!
"I love you Jake!" I blurted, blushing furiously.
He was shocked, his eyes wide and his mouth hanging open. Ok, this was getting on my nerves… Why wasn't he saying anything? Was he mad at me? I averted my eyes, embarrassed.
"But of course, if you… if you changed… your mind… I… I…" he finally recovered, placing a hand on my lips to stop my babbling.
"You love me?!" he breathed. I nodded once, still staring at my hands in my lap.
"And what about - him?" he asked, "I don't want you to feel as if you owe me this."
"I told you I love you because it's true, not because I feel like I have to." I whispered, my cheeks still burning, and my eyes still fixed on my lap.
I could feel him smile as he held me in his arms.
"It's getting late."
I looked at the sky outside, he was right. It was getting late, but I didn't want him to go away.
"You wanna come in? You can stay for dinner if you want to…" I started, hoping he would take the hint, which he did.
"Sure, but what about Billy?" I thought about it for a moment.
"How about Charlie picks him up coming home from work?"
We got out of the car and into the house, just as it started raining.
"Why don't you call Charlie and your father while I cook dinner?" he just shrugged and grabbed the phone, sitting in one of the kitchen chairs. I could feel his eyes on the back of my head as I cooked.
I was stirring pasta when I felt two strong arms hug me from behind. We just stayed there, him holding me and me leaning my back against him.
"Why did you change your mind?" he asked, suddenly. I looked up at him and sighed.
"I just realized that it's useless to keep mourning about something that belongs to the past with no possibility of coming back, and that's it's useless to keep hurting the only one that was always there for me and that never let me down. You're like my personal sun, Jake, you're the only one able to make me forget my pain. I can't make it without you, that's why I love you." It was the longest speech I had said in a long time. He hugged me tight as I spoke as if he was afraid I'd change my mind again and leave.
"Bells…", I turned around so I was facing him. He placed his hands against the counter on either side of me and leaned forward. He looked deep in thought, almost concentrated as he stared intently at me; I stared back into those deep, beautiful brown eyes. He moved his gaze from my eyes to my lips, unconsciously licking his lips as he did so, he then looked at me again, uncertainty in his eyes, as if he was asking me permission; but one brief look at my lips again was all it took to change uncertainty into determination. He leaned forward and softly pressed his lips to mine, but pulled away almost immediately, much to my dislike. I guess my expression gave away my disappointment because he chuckled softly before leaning in for another kiss. Our lips moved together, slowly, in the sweetest kiss ever. But I yearned for more; I leaned against his chest, putting my arms around his neck and playing with his hair. Our lips started moving faster, our breathing ragged. Slowly he moved his hands to my lower back, pulling me closer to him. Seconds later our kiss – at the beginning so sweet and loving – became very passionate. My hands were holding tight onto his hair, pulling him closer to me. He too had a hand in my hair, keeping it out of my face, while his other arm was around my waist, holding me tight against his broad chest.
He deepened the kiss and licked my lower lip, asking for entrance which I immediately granted him; our lips were sealed while we fought with our tongues for dominance, separating only to breathe.
He then moved down to kiss my neck, making me shiver. Me knees nearly gave out as he kissed the spot right below my ear, my weak spot.
"I can hear the car", he whispered.
"Already?!", I whined.
He chuckled lowly in my ear, leaving a trail of butterfly kisses from my neck up to my lips. "Yep, already."
He kept kissing me softly 'til we heard Charlie park the car outside; he then left my side to go sit in the same chair as before.
Charlie walked in pushing Billy's wheelchair in the kitchen.
"Hey kids! How was your day? Did you have fun?"
"Yep, lots of fun." Jacob answered, looking at me and smirking widely, making me blush.
I saw Bella jump from that cliff and got on the first flight for Forks, even though I knew it was useless. Once I was there I drove to Bella's house, hoping I could be of some use for Charlie, but when I got there, I was very surprised – and actually, even hurt – with what I saw: first of all, Bella was alive, and that was such a relief! Even if I didn't understand how she survived. But what surprised me the most was that she wasn't alone; she was with that Jacob boy and he was looking at her back while she cooked. I didn't know what to do: should I stay or should I leave and give Bella the human life Edward wanted for her? I decided to go park the car at my old house, and run back. When I returned, Jacob was hugging Bella. I could hear them, even though I was hiding in the woods.
"Why did you change your mind?", he asked. What was he talking about?
"I just realized that it's useless to keep mourning about something that belongs to the past with no possibility of coming back, and that's it's useless to keep hurting the only one that was always there for me and that never let me down. You're like my personal sun, Jake, you're the only one able to make me forget my pain. I can't make it without
you, that's why I love you."
Bella... w-what are you saying??
"I can't make it without you, that's why I love you." This wasn't even possible… this couldn't be possible.
I mean, for her to forget us so quickly? She could be angry, broken, hurt… but to forget us completely?
My eyes snapped shut, as I turned away from the scene before me, betrayal settling deep inside my heart. But she wasn't betraying only me, she had left behind the others too: Esme, Carlisle, Jasper, Emmett, even Rosalie… and most importantly Edward.
Oh God… Edward. She had already moved on. She wasn't waiting for him. How the hell was I going to keep this from him? I couldn't. Sure enough, he would find out on his own one day, and then… he would never forgive me.
But that wasn't the only shock these two were giving to my silent heart.
The next thing I knew, his arms were wrapped around her as their lips collided together, both acting with such an intense passion… that all I could do, was stare. I couldn't keep my eyes off of them; it was like a painful magnet.
That was it. How dare she do something like this to my brother? She claimed she loved him, but one word was all it had taken her to lose faith in him when we left, and now she was already throwing herself at someone else!
This was going to kill Edward… I knew it, even if he kept saying this was what he wanted for her, it was a lie. He wanted her for himself; to spend the rest of eternity together… because he would never stop loving her. I had to convince him to come back and tell her the truth, it was the only way! Otherwise he would never be happy again, he would let her have a human life, let her die and then put an end to his existence.
I couldn't, and wouldn't let that happen! I loved him – I loved both of them – too much to let that happen. But how was I going to convince him to come back?
I looked in Bella's future to see who she would choose… but I didn't see her. I couldn't see her. Something was blocking me and my visions. That's when I smelled it: it was like a wet dog. It reminded me of something, something about the past, but I couldn't place my finger on it.
Just then I was interrupted by Charlie and Billy's arrival.
"Hey kids! How was your day? Did you have fun?"
"Yep! Lots of fun", Jacob answered, smirking as he looked at Bella, making her blush. Fool… I growled, slinking into a crouch. How dare he believe he could compete with Edward?".
They all sat down to eat, like a normal family. Like a normal, human and happy family.
I couldn't watch anymore… to see her happy, all the time knowing that my brother was somewhere, knelt in a corner, his face pressed deep into his hands, as he silently and tearlessly sobbed, letting his broken heart rule over every other emotion.
I sped towards the airport, waiting for the moment to tell Edward what I'd seen.
Maybe he'd find some peace in his heart – knowing that she was safe and happy, and that she was living a normal, human life.
Or maybe he would try to follow me back.
I really hoped so.
It's my first fanfic, please be nice. I hope there are not too many mistakes, I have problems writing in words the stories I have in mind. Constructive criticism is very welcomed! Please review! =)
Ps: the title "the alternative" refers to the alternative Jacob gives Bella, to give her a choice instead of letting her pain consume her from the inside!