Pokemon Diamond and Pearl Gone Wrong
Meet Allen, he's fifteen and he's just been to his local post office to receive his package, a Nintendo DS Lite, a copy of Pokemon Diamond and a Pokemon Diamond and Pearl walkthrough. This cost him £59.42 of his dad's money. Meanwhile, Emma who is also fifteen went to her local GameStation with her own money and bought a copy of Pokemon Pearl to play on her classic Nintendo DS for £29.99. The thing that neither of them realised was that they would be in the game themselves purely for your entertainment. I wish them good luck and recommend they buy life insurance because the majority of FanFics that are parodies of games usually end up with one main character suffering from a running gag involving a tractor and their spine. What? They don't? What a relief! That's a lot of pressure off me.
Allen opened his eyes slowly and rolled over in bed to find a girl with long straight pink hair lying next to him. This was Emma but keep it a secret because Allen doesn't know who she is yet. Allen cried out in shock and immediately fell out of bed onto the wooden floor of a bedroom.
"What's going on?" Allen's cry had suddenly awoken Emma. She sat up to see a boy with messy light green hair and glowing yellow eyes lying on the floor looking up at her. Allen looked into the girl's mysterious purple eyes.
"So, this is the world of Pokemon? You wake up in bed with someone with odd coloured hair. They said nothing about this on the box." Allen stood up and sorted out his baggy blue jeans and black jumper. The girl got out of bed and pretended to smarten herself up by rearranging the position of her jeans and tried to hide as much of her stomach that was showing as she could, which was very little because her white sleeveless top revealed her belly button and a few centimetres above. The two faced each other and made first impressions. They both thought the same, the other is extremely weird.
"I guess introductions are in order. I am Emma, you are?" Emma offered a handshake. Allen immediately shoved his hands into his trouser pockets.
"Allen, but everyone calls me Awesome." Allen produced a very cheesy grin.
"Sure they do, Allen." Emma said sarcastically as she went over to the stairs. Allen groaned and followed her downstairs. When they reached the bottom of the stairs a blue haired woman who had been sat at the table in the middle of the room ran over to them.
"Hey! Who are you? I don't have two kids! I only have one and whoever my kid is they look nothing like you! Now get out of here before I call the Police and report you for trespassing on private property!" The woman who was shorter than our heroes raised a fist very angrily and pointed to the door with her other hand. Allen and Emma looked at each other for a moment and left the house.
"That's very odd. If she's got a kid and the room upstairs is the kid's room, where does she sleep?" Emma wondered why there had only been one room on each floor.
"She may not speak like it but she acts like she's from Alabama so they must sleep together." Allen laughed while reading a book.
"What's that you've got there?" Emma looked at the book.
"It is the Pokemon Diamond and Pearl walkthrough. It says we now need to meet our rival in his house. That shouldn't be too hard there are only four houses here and we know it's not that one." Allen pointed at the house they'd come out of.
"You know before we started the game we got to name our rival. What did you call him? I called him Stupid." Emma asked her green haired companion.
"I called him Twat. So either way he's going to have a horrible and embarrassing name." Allen opened to door of the house behind the house the two had woken up in to reveal a man pointing a shotgun at them.
"Stupid trespassers!" the man fired a warning shot that narrowly missed Emma's left foot. Allen immediately shut the door and pointed at the house on the other side of the street. This time when they opened the door there was a happy looking woman.
"Ah, you must be here to see Malcolm. He's upstairs, but first could you tell me if he's been on any drugs lately because he's been very hyper-active?" Allen and Emma ignored the woman's question and went straight upstairs to find a blonde haired boy in a striped t-shirt running around hitting himself with the shoe that should have been on his right foot.
"Oi, Stupid Twat Malcolm, stop that!" Allen shouted at the strange boy. Malcolm stopped running and stared at the two strangers who were in his room.
"OMG! Pink hair, LOL!" Malcolm pointed at Emma, laughed in what could be considered a very disturbing way and ran down the stairs.
"I don't like Malcolm." Emma looked down the stairs.
"The name or him?" Allen pointed at Malcolm who was trying and failing to push open the front door.
"Both." Emma followed Allen out of the house. Malcolm ran around in circles and then ran out of the town using the only exit which was to the north. Allen and Emma followed the hyper-active boy west along route 201 and through some trees to Lake Verity. An old man in a lab coat was stood by the water's edge talking to thin air as if there was somebody there including pauses for response. The old man then walked past Allen, Emma and the hyper-active Malcolm.
"The senile old man's left his briefcase here." Allen walked over to look at the brown bag left by the water's edge. Emma walked over as well but then they were both distracted by Malcolm sat on the floor singing the Teletubbies theme tune. "Please can I throw him in the lake?"
"Sadly, no." Emma shook her head and sighed. Then three small grey birds stood looking at our heroes and Malcolm.
"Well, according to the book they're attacking us and we have to use the Pokemon from the briefcase to battle them." Allen referred to his walkthrough. Each Starly tilted its head and belched individually.
"But they're harmless." Emma bent down to stroke a Starly but it jumped up and started pecking on her head. The other two birds stared for a moment and then joined in. Allen opened the briefcase and took the three Pokeballs from inside. He handed one to Emma and threw one at Malcolm. When the Pokeball hit Malcolm it opened and a Piplup appeared.
"Piplup is a n00bish Pokemon for n00bs!" Malcolm crossed his arms and looked away from the small blue penguin stood in front of him. "I want a Charizard or a Golem or a Kingdra or a Pichu!" Allen and Emma stared at Malcolm. Even the three Starlys on Emma's head stopped pecking at it to stare at him.