Dancing Fools

Disclaimer: All familiar characters belong to DC or Marvel. I Own Farrah/Persiana and Lance/Diablos.

Chapter 1: The Insane Plot Begins

Flash asked,

"Why did he call us here again?"

Wonder Woman said worriedly,

"I don't know, Flash. It's probably one of Persiana13's more insane ideas."

Diablos looked around,

"Farrah's not here, either."

Superman shook his head,

"I don't even want to know what those two are cooking up."

Green Arrow grumbled,

"I bet she's sleeping with him. One of the perks about being the star in your fiction is you get to sleep with the writer and figure out ways to torture the rest of the mainstream universe."

Diablos shook his head,

"Persiana13 isn't that bad."

He noticed everyone's looks at the red-eyed hero,

"Oh, come on. He's tortured us at least once, especially his star."

Wonder Woman asked

"Diablos, how can you not think that Persiana13 is the most insane, self-centered, egotistical…

Diablos' eyes widened,

"Diana…"

Wonder Woman continued,

"Masochistic, devious, ludicrous, evil…"

Diablos said,

"Uh, Diana, you really should turn around."

Wonder Woman scowled,

"He put my underwear on E-bay. Who does that man think he is?"
The guy that gives you your paychecks.

Wonder Woman blinked and turned,

"Did I ever tell you you're handsome?"

Farrah shook her head ,

"Don't bother, princess. We heard everything."

Yeah, I hate to fire you in this economy. Although, I could give you a glowing recommendation to Playboy and…

Wonder Woman said,

"I'll shut up now."

I figured you would.

Superman asked,

"Are you going to tell us what we're all doing here?"

Yes I am.

The author moved out to a podium raised above the stage,

My brothers and sisters, I have seen the light-.

Flash teased,

"It's an oncoming train."

The heroes snickered at that. The author glared,

Do you really want me to write you're Shayera's lover? I can make that happen, you know.

Hawkgirl slapped Flash upside the head,

"Shut up, stupid!"

Thank you. As I was saying, I have seen the light. I have found inspiration in my dreams.

Hawk snickered,

"I bet it's when he has too much coffee and mint chocolate chip ice cream."

The author shook his head and continued,

We have a new show idea. Dancing Fools!

Farrah explained,

"We're going to pair up members of the Justice League, and, every week, they'll dance for America!"

Wonder Woman raised her hand,

"Isn't it like that show 'Dancing with the Stars', and you're ripping it off?"

Do I look like the Fox Network to you?

Flash quipped,

"No, they're actually snappier dressers."

The author shook his head,

Now, Farrah and I have compiled a list of people participating in this event, and, after the couples are introduced, we'll meet our judges. Now, Farrah can't participate because she and I collaborated on this, but she is in charge of all the dance outfits.

Wonder Woman groaned,

"We're dead."

Farrah grinned,

"Chill, Di. It'll be fun for me to dress you all up."

Batman said,

"I'm not doing this."

He began to leave.

I wouldn't try to escape, Batman. The doors are all locked until I go down the list.

Batman growled,

"Do you want a concussion?"

Do you want a lawsuit?

Flash grinned,

"I think the show's a great idea."

Good, because you and Shayera are one of the couples.

Hawkgirl shouted,

"What? Have you lost your mind?"

Superman was stunned ,

"You're asking him?"

Farrah smirked,

"Come on. Let's just play along."

Green Arrow, you're partner is Black Canary.

Wonder Woman folded her arms,

"Big surprise there."

Metamorpho, you're paired up with Crimson Fox.

Crimson Fox lustfully gazed at Metamorpho,

"Bonjour, amour."

Metamorpho pleaded,

"Can I take a rain check on this?"

No. No cop outs, and no turning back. I already signed the papers.

Hawk said,

"He forged our signatures."

Diana, you and Batman are paired up.

Batman gruffed,

"Figures."

John Stewart and Vixen, Roy and Donna, and Guy Garnder and Ice.

John nodded,

"I can do this."

Roy shrugged,

"At least we got a few canon couples."

And, last but not least; Superman and Fire.

Fire squealed,

"This is going to be good. I mean, I had doubts before, but I'm not complaining now!" She hugged Superman, grabbing his butt.

Superman squirmed,

"Uh, thank you?"

He glared at Persiana13.

And now, for our judges.

Hawk rolled his eyes,

"Oh, goody."

First up…LEX LUTHOR!

The chair turned around, and Lex was tied to chair, a gag in his mouth and a lump on his head. Lex said through his muffled mouth,

"MFHAHAHAHMMAHAMAMAAMM!"

Superman was surprised,

"Lex is judging?"

He couldn't resist coming.

Wonder Woman asked,

"How did he get the bump on his head?"
You don't want to know, trust me. Now, for the second judge…THE JOKER!
Joker grinned,

"Hiya, Lexie!"

Superman groaned,

"We're dead."

Wonder Woman rubbed her head,

"Just what we need; two psychotic lunatics in the same room. This is going to end badly."

Joker said to the League,

"Oh come on. Crazy's good for ya. It's done wonders for me!"

Hawk groaned,

"Yeah, you're a barrel of laughs."

Hey, no comments from the peanut gallery!

The author pulled out a bean bag gun and fired at Hawk's head. Hawk falls unconscious

Now, for our third judge…

The author turned and shouted,

Catman, what did I tell you about wearing that?

Catman dressed in a shirt reading 'Persiana is my Mate' said,

"Like my shirt?"

Get rid of it.

Catman took off the shirt.

And the signs

The author ripped up a 'Persiana Rules' sign.

And the letters.

Catman groaned,

"Oh, come on. Those are innocent.

The author snatched the letters from Catman,

Catman, there is no way in hell Persiana is doing THAT, or THAT, or THAT, or even considering THAT with you.

The author ripped up letters, pulled out an extra large mallet and slammed it into Catman's head. Catman was delirious,

"Look at the pretty kitties!"

He fell on table, unconscious.

Now that that's settled, let the show begin!

Superman wailed,

"We're doomed!"

Next Chapter:

The Show Begins