a NEW AUTHOR'S Gonna be posting in a few days. her name is Shirosaki-sama, and she's a good friend of mine. Ya'll better be nice to her! Note: This is a divergence from will you be my queen. What would have happened if Ichigo remembered his human life, and wasn't polarized against it?

You'd be surprised.

--

"You poor creature."

A hand was extended with those words, and the vasto lorde eyed it warily. "Come, Kurosaki." Beckoned the man. "I will give you back some semblance of your human form."

--

And then suddenly everything went blank.

As soon as he shook off the sudden urge to curl up somewhere and sleep, Ichigo realized that something warm and soft was crawling up his limbs; he looked down and saw countless streams of light gushing from the floor. Their every stroke brought solace and hope, their every withdrawal broke one's heart in many ways.

It must've been pure spiritual essence, for nothing else could ever caress Hollow's reiatsu-hardened skin so sensually.

Ichigo wanted to drown himself in this energy; the power manifested, the eternity itself. The trickles of energy avoided touching his mask, though; they restlessly tried to slide underneath the white of the bone. The Vasto Lorde levered up the mask with his massive arms; the essence slid under the opening, soothing the sharp pain. He heard somebody shout; the sudden noise echoed very close – too close – to him, destroying the blessed atmosphere of the moment.

An inch higher. A sharp cry, a litany of indistinguishable curses.

whyareyoudoingthistouswhathavewedoneWHATHAVEWEDONE...

Two inches more. A wall of wails, a distinct crack of a bone.

wehaveaccompaniedyouWEWERESOCLOSETOYOUandnowyouaredoingthisstopnow...

The streams of energy suddenly retreated, leaving Tesla in the middle of screaming voices. Alone.

stopnowstopnowstopnowNOWNOWNOW!

And when he was about to give up, to let the mask go and make those ear-piercing noises vanish, after the last convulsive throw of his arms the mask broke and darkness engulfed everything

Mayble following him was a mistake.

--

"AGH!"

His howl of raw agony sounded like nails grating down on a chalkboard.

It was agonizing.

He screamed for what felt like a hellish eternity.

After the pain, he forced his eyes open, and blinked at the ceiling. The ceiling was completely unamazing, smooth, and stark white. He knew this ceiling, had woken up to see it many times before. But he couldn't figure out why he was looking at it.

Wasn't he dead?

"You're awake." a soft kind voice said, and he bolted upright, turned his head to see a...

Woman smiling at him.

"I'm alive?" He murmurred, one hand touching his face, where his mask should be.

It was there, or rather, part of it was. It was still there, but now only part of it covered his upper left face. On his right ear, at the area where you would get your ear pierced, the whole edge was covered in the remains of his mask, from the top to the bottom. The top then curved up and attached itself to his face, running down his cheek a bit. But not far enough to be very noticeable. He brought his hand up and touched it with his fingers. Most of the time he forgot it was even there.

But when he did it still seemed so foreign to him.

"Yes you are." She murmured, and placed a cool hand on his forehead.

She had flowing teal hair with bangs that fell into her eyes, and a skull mask with curved horns was intact on top of her head. Her face was even more beautiful up close, large viridian eyes looking over his bloody, scarred body with the utmost concern the spots of blush under her eyes adding a bit of innocence to her persona.

He could not help but notice that she was impressively well endowed.

She extended her other hand to him.

"My name is Neliel. Tercera espada."

Ichigo blinked, then noticed the number tattooed on his hand, when he went to shake with her.

It was a large black 1, in a gothic style.

"Kurosaki Ichigo."

Only then did he realize he was naked, with only a sheet draped across his lower groin region.

He turned a deep red.

"Gah!"

Neliel tossed him a white jacket, black sash, and a white hakama which he hastily donned. Suddenly, he felt the strong desire NOT to expose himself like that ever again.

"Th-Thanks."

"The standard uniforms are too plain for my taste" remarked the pink haired man called Szayel upon hearing that. "Besides, they won't complement his figure" he added with a small smirk, ogling Ichigo's figure from behind his spectacles-shaped mask. If the Hollows were able to blush, Ichigo would've blushed; yet they weren't and he was grateful for this small convenience.

"The hierarchy of Las Noches is a rather simple issue" the older Arrancar began as Ichigo got dressed. Then, with Neliel, they were walking down the long corridor – or at least one of them walked. Getting used to a small, humanoid form was not a simple issue, thought Ichigo as he stumbled forward, leaning heavily on the nearby wall.

Taking pity on him, Neliel draped one arm under his, and let him lean on her.

"Every Arrancar is assigned a number from eleven to ninety-nine, proportionally to the order in which he was born. You are currently bearing number...one, and it most likely won't change" Szayel continued without turning back to look at Ichigo and Nel. "Of course, the system has its faults. Take this failure of a brother, for example. His number is fifteen; yet he is much younger than many of our higher-classed kinsmen" the Arrancar sighed with exasperation.

"Ichigo, do you think you are up to visitors?" Neliel asked this, curiously, kindly a sharp contrast to Szayel.

Ichigo looked at her strangely.

"Visitors?"

"Hai."

Aizen-sama wants you to pick out a fraccion." Szayel added this last part.

Ichigo did not seemed to pleased about this.

But then again, he didn't entirely understand it either.

"What in kami's name is a fraccion? And who the hell is Aizen-sama?"

Neliel giggled.

"You'll find out soon enough, Ichigo-kun."

"Indeed he will."

They now entered a room, and upon doing so, the first thing Ichigo saw was a massive sword.

"Ah, there he is." Commented Szayel, strolling over to the massive cleaver. With little difficulty, he hefted the blade up, and tossed it to Ichigo. The vasto lorde, now able to stand on his own, caught hastily.

Almost immediately, the cleaver was warm to the touch. This was no he. Everything about the blade felt distinctly feminine. It was a living part of himself, warm and pulsating under his fingers, clearly longing for his touch. Despite its obviously masculine appearance, its guard was elegant shaped like a curved, three pointed shuriken. (No, its not Zangetsu)

Hello, Ichigo. Purred a woman's voice, and he nearly yelped in surprise.

I've been waiting for a long time.

'Wh-Who're you?"

A laugh.

"You may call me... Endriago." The voice cooed.

Hold it, why the hell could he still have a zanpaktou?

He then turned to the door, as someone had knocked.

"Tell the new guy that we're having a meeting!" Came a harsh voice from the hall.

"Shut up Grimmjow." Neliel replied brightly, to the voice taking Ichigo's wrist and pulling him off the table upon which he had sat.

"We're coming!"

"Whoa-hey!"

Ichigo had no choice but to follow Neliel.

This was a very strange day.